One minute she's flying next minute she's dying
Trying
Fighting
Crying
Wonder why and
What to do to get back the feeling she once had
Is she trying to bring back a dead situation
Is God telling her to stop and let go
But what does she do when he is all that  she knows
He has her
Mind
Body
Heart
And Soul
How does she detach those strings he has embedded into her.
How does she cut those ties that's forged deep within
Her relationship all filled with sin
Holding on to lust
When the heart is what really matter
Connecting with bodies
Forgetting the pain
Putting  aside her brain
And spirit
And falling victim to her flesh
He kisses her chest and make her forget about what's next and just focus on that moment of pleasure
For 5 mins in time
Then she looks at sky
And ask God why ?
Why do we do the things we do
When we know it will hurt us in the end
Feelings intertwine in lust , love and life .

Tears , stay in ,
Tears don't come out ,
tears don't reveal to the world that I am weak
Tears why don't you allow me to speak , Tears why do you come out at the worst times .
tears stop it ,
your fooling with my mind ,
tears your  causing bag under my eyes , How am I suppose to hide my emotions inside when I can’t stop this leakage  ,
Tears why do you haunt me so,
Yeah my heart's broken but I don't want the whole world to know ,
Tears do me a favour ,
Help me put on a show when I'm out in public you don't have to be known
So When I’m all  alone in my room in bed by myself ,
You can grow and burst and do whatever you please.
But tears please don't patronize me
Cause me to plea ,
Sacrifice my pride
I'm weak ,
I need to be strong ,
I need to be meek ,
So tears allow me to be free. Please

Scared to go into the light
So you hide
Try to change your disguise
But in the end it’s futile
Because the you that was then
That closed the door
Shut out and ignore
Is here to haunt you once more  when your
Bored,
Hurting,
Alone,
Depressed ,
Stressed ,
Had enough
And when you look around and see that there’s nobody there
You only have yourself  to blame
“Serves you right “
It’s all your fault.

It’s all her fault
She let it happen
Who knew she  played the part of an insignificant  person oh so well
The extras in those movies
Yup that’s her
Everybody’s the main character in her life story but her  ,
So she settles  and hide
And politely pushes herself   to the side
Says everything all right
Pretend
Disguise
All the feelings she  tries to hide
Always come back to haunt her
Then she’s  left alone
And then ask “why “ ?

She’s  kind
And sweet
And ties everything together so neat
And then she’s  left alone
Everything unravels
And then ask “why”?
  
She says the right things
Always been supportive  
Never really cared about herself  only others
And then she’s  left alone
And resorts to writing her  emotions on a piece of paper
And then she asks “why” ?

She’s  responsible
She’s  always relied on but when it comes to her there’s never a person she can rely in
Does what she’s  told
No matter how much she breaks
She doesn’t show one crack
Her heads off the rail but she makes sure it appears on track
Never pushes anything to far
Calmly keeping up the act
She doesn’t  step but tiptoes
around everyone and anything around her
And then she’s left alone
And she really wonders “why”?

she gave me her nudes
she was bare
and naked
and so out
and open
and i willingly
accepted it
because it wasnt the nudes
that showed her body
the physical aspects
that made her beautiful
it was the words
she didnt choose
and the spontaneity
that left her
either from her lips
or her fingers
or ink

she was as bare
as her nudes
and i accepted
her for her.

I’ve always felt unhappy
I’ve always felt alone
The city I lived in for 20 years
I don’t feel at home
Everybody feels like strangers
Connected humming to the same tune
But I am like an alien
Far away from home
I never fit in
I don’t know how to blend
My being is so awkward
I don’t have any friends
I struggle to figure out
Why I don’t belong
Why can’t I catch the tune of this outmost popular song
But I’m stuck humming quietly in my own zone .
I’ve always wondered why I was left all alone .