Am I living or am I doing
Am I living or am I doing
Am I living or am I doing
Am I living or am I doing
Questions that keep migrating between my right and left brain
Unsettled bee hive
I pull at my hair hoping to stretch the stream of thought beyond physical limitations
Elasticity
Girl like mystery
I lived in the darkness
Till you fixed the lighthouse
And now I'm lost in the light

Brick by brick
Building pyramids to signal home
Sometimes I just wish I was alone
What I knew is like a cut down forest
Just a past to reminsce in
Stuck in this limbo of love and death
Whose breath can't I steal next

Siren be
Siren unhappy
Cause how do you know if love is real
How do you know how to feel
Friends, grandfathers, grandmothers
Too many of them live in the dirt
Too many times has the home burnt down
Misunderstanding lingers in the doorway as echoes of parents no longer lovers
Dark things the only familiarity...family
Becoming angry at nightlights

**** I'm falling in love
Like the first time like the last time
Do we all imagine a finish line in our lives
**** I'd rather go fishing
Pull the lady from the lake
And ask if she's happy

Two strangers
Opposite of a bridge
Meet center
But he dropped the fire
"I don't want to be in love anymore"

I feel like all I inherited from my father,
Is anger

You are like spam.

Honest feelings
Born in the indulgeness i'm lingering from
in touch in time
Fall for you existence

Trying to tame a black cat
As pebble stone washed upon shore during moon peering home like health inspection
uncertain necessary
There we lay happenstance of high tide gifted each other liminal
I wanna kiss you again

I used to date letter
A boy who wrote like an apology
Then I realized,
He was only good at explaining himself

The stars in my eyes are becoming black holes
Soon they will consume me whole and in my mind I cough up blood
The rivers of the stuff spell words like Mistake and Broken and Forgotten
I just can't stop
I've held it all back like a dam that's finally bursting Through
The seams like a shirt too Full and the buttons go flying like Bullets

I hurt those around me
Thorns are growing from the remaining skin and bone
Protecting me from human contact
I'm disappearing like a little houdini
fading from view like a vanishing point

My meaning in life dissipates
Within my lack of discovery
Place cells eradicating memory
Like forest fire

"All I want to be is your antidote"

And on that day
my Curiosity died.

'Cause being alone
Is its own form of home

I don't write
I don't sleep
Eating is optional
Less human
More whim

I sit on this porch
Waiting for rain
To wash away