Girl lives her whole life lost, but like a goldfish in the small glass bowl
The youngest out of all her cousins that are more so brothers and sisters
The endless screams, the repetitive punches and slaps
The shakes and the nightmares that left her in a cold sweat every single night
Most of it I don’t remember,
I just know everything that happened to a child gave birth to a more sinister darker hollow shell
Girl grows up, isolated and alone.
Not to protect herself, but everyone else that surrounded her
The screams and nightmares continue
It feels like a horror movie that she has no recollection of
But somehow was there.
Blackout, she purged every single trauma out of her mind trying to save herself the pain.
She knows the monster that was raised, the voices inside.
Girl turns 22 and transitions.
Rebirths to a new personality, a fresh start
A girl calls herself Joshua,
He’s learning everything new,
He found someone who says they love him
But do they really?
After years of survival, the girl he fell in love with expected him to easily love her
How could he?
He never knew what love was
He still doesn’t
All he knows is, sleep, eat, work and play the part
But he started feeling, she drew out humanity in this hollowed out shell
And he trusted her, because she said all the right words
He ran to her when she was broken, he waited up nights on end to make sure she was okay
He was always a phone call away
He was there,
But not how she wanted
And he’s the villain, she’s gone now
And he’s suppose to go back to being alone
What she didn’t know is that he’s okay
He’s used to people leaving when and only if he lets them in
And shows how broken he is, how nothing can fix him
He just needed someone to love him while he attempted to even begin to heal
But she taught him a valuable lesson...
Broken people don’t find love,
No one can truly love a broken person
Alone keeps you safe
And that emotions are a weakness
He’s a monster
He’s the one who hurt her
He’s the problem
He’s too much