you must love the control
you must love the lies
you must love the mind games

brainwash me
brainwash me

my life is a dream

everything I know
unfolding
a lie slips out

tell me again
your twisted fairytale
sounds so real

your magic
doesn't work on me

I love you
for trying

all my life
I fed off your tragedies

your shadow
your reflection
I broke the mirror
and cut myself with the broken pieces

it's not your fault

you must love
you must love it

She wore a baggy sweater, on the cold colorless night. Walking down the corner of ******* boulevard and  litter lane.
Bleak as it always was, she dreamt of wearing a red dress to give color to the black and white.

But she was too afraid, and she didn't.

Would you think it's stupid if I told you I remembered something you forgot.
I try not to say, I don't want to upset you.
I always remember things you tell me, or I try to. The things that are important to you.
Sometimes I wonder, do you think to do the same? Am I in your memory?

Do I roam your thoughts,
Or do I run through them and become nothing but an afterthought?
I don't want to be the last thing you remember or the first you forget.
I want to know how important I am to you.

Is that stupid?

I've been broken up into pieces. One says I'm being a fool and that I should wait for you.
The other says I'm a fool because I'm waiting for you.

Why am I still up?
A combination of sadness and uncontrollable coughing.

If you knew me, you might think," Why the sadness? You have your family, you have the girl. Why?"

Well I don't know, but it feels as though my body does before I do, that I'm going to lose something. It's kept me up late at night. Coughing up a lung, my blood heats up, and goes straight to my head. I feel something coming.
But is it my gut, that's always right? Or my heart that steers me wrong..?

I can't tell..