My lungs are deep & shallow,
My breathing still can’t follow.
My heart cracks in mysterious rows,
My eyes sees all but they definitely aren’t hollow.
As they fall off one by one, another is built in its place,
Except this heart is made out of steel, as my eyes are filled with your face,
and my mind but a name only my soul can reframe,
That you might be one of my other lost lace that’s the color of a red string that was once lost in all my daydreams.

I hate the color yellow
I hate the color pink
I hate blue and green together
Is there any piece left that’s me?

My clothes all feel tainted
They all remind me of you
It is so hard to feel myself
Stupid wardrobe I can’t afford to renew

Can I still like essential oils
Are these journals even me?
I don’t even like anything
It’s so hard to feel pretty

My plants are all dying
My family is scared
I can’t carry everyone’s bags
I’ve been losing so much hair

Everything I write is sad
I feel that if he knew he wouldn’t care
I loved him as hard as I could
He is the harshest tear

I was never enough
And it’s only after I can see
Hindsight is 20/20
My love…I was all I was able to be

I woke up from a nightmare
I could not stand to keep
to myself

you were stretched across the couch
coffee going cold on the table
a half finished cigarette
still burning

you wrapped me up
in kind words that
I could not bare
to hear

whispered into my ear
"one day we will go wandering
and this tiny house will overspill
with dreams'

you are not your memories, darling
you are not the bad things
that have been done to you
you are a fierce flame
that warms my heart

forget them, my love
they are nothing
and you, and you
are everything

I forgive you, I forgive me, I even forgive the Yggdrasilly tree that swung me. I forgive them, I forgive us, I forgive the festering wounds, infected with pus. Forgive the collective, forgive unrespective. It's time to free us to give up ghosts and get this.

I met love in a field of flowers
It sat alone in the sunlight.
“Can I sit beside you?”
I asked it.
And it nodded its head.
Its small hands folded softly in its lap.
“Do you ever get tired?”
I asked it.
And I heard it exhale.
“Can I sleep beside you?”
I asked.
And it nodded,
Resting its head next to mine.
“We’ll just close our eyes for a moment”
I said,
“Just long enough for the spinning to stop.”