As the train stopped, we saw flames rising from a tall chimney into a black sky.
We stared at the flames in the darkness, and left behind our illusions.
Human being were being burned, children thrown into the flames.
The smell of burning flesh was in the air.
The child I was had been consumed by the flames.
They consumed my faith forever.
They turned my dreams to ashes.
Thick smoke had poisoned my soul.
It had been invaded—and devoured—by a black flame.
The desire to live had transformed into smoke,
And it disappeared over the horizon forever.
Were this fire to be extinguished one day, nothing would be left but the dead.
Anguish on their faces, and hate in their eyes for all eternity.
To this infernal hell for all eternity we were condemned.
Hate lit the fire that was the beginning of the end.

I’m suddenly bombarded by a wave of panic I’m slowly drowning
A unexplained darkness starts to surround me

I can feel the adrenaline course through my veins
I’m flooded by it’s sweet pain
I can’t wait for when this is over finally
My hands start shaking violently

Blood rushes to my cheeks turning them bright red
I can’t move I’m trapped inside my own head
I can’t think I can’t see everything’s getting foggy
An invisible serpent slithers it’s way up my body
Squeezing and squeezing it tightens as it’s makes its way to my neck
It’s slithers around me it’s so grotesque
Slowing curling around. It grips tighter and  tighter
My lungs are burning now they’re on fire

My throat starts to close and I can’t speak
My legs turn to rubber and they become so weak
***** is slowly rising burning its way up my throat
My chest feels as though it’s going to explode
I gasp for air as I silently choke
And the pressure will just increase
My stomach knots and hot tears slide down my cheeks
My heart beats rapidly to an ominous beat
I’m burning and sweating I can’t handle this heat
My panic clouds my brain and I can’t think
I collapse and shrink

My jaw is sore from gritting my teeth
I look fine on the outside but I’m fighting a silent battle underneath
I can’t breathe I can’t breathe I can’t breathe
Why won’t it stop why won’t it cease

With all this pain my teeth start to grind
I’m Held captive within my own mind

I’m going to die I’m going to die I’m going to die
Why won’t it stop why why why
My anxiety is exploding in my brain
Im engulfed by this excruciating pain
It’s like a tidal wave of suffering I’m just trying not to be drowned
I’m screaming and suffocating but no one seems to hear a sound

But suddenly my anxiety starts to slowly relinquish its power
It’s only been a few minutes but it felt like hours
My heart  starts to slow and I start to relax
My ability to breathe slowly comes back
I look down surprised to find my body intact
I’m fine it was just another panic attack

I’m fine
The little lie I tell every day
I’m fine
Besides the anxiety and depression that won’t go away
I’m fine
My insomnia just keeps me awake every night
I’m fine
I’m just always violently shaking with fright
I’m fine
I just cant seem to get out of my bed
I’m fine
I just cant escape my own head

My mind is a messy bedroom
It’s an endless void of anxiety and gloom
Littered with the words I never said
Drawers ready to burst with all the thoughts inside my head
My insomnia is thrown across my bed
Anxiety covers the cluttered ground
Depression is found all around
The smell of old rotting dreams fills the air
Thoughts are scattered everywhere

My sanity slowly starts to unfold
I’m Tethered to my bed like my safe haven in the storm that is the world
But it’s just a mirage my demons follow even in my bed
You can’t outrun your troubles when they’re confined to your head

My mind is a prison
I can’t move i can’t see I’m losing my vision
Serving this life sentence in my mind for a crime I didn’t commit
I wont admit or come to grips
With the fact that my enemy is me
My anxiety, depression and insomnia won’t just let me be
I may be alive but I’m already dead inside
The old me has died
I’m Held captive within my own mind
Chained to the wall of depression and anxiety I built
Nothing grows here my dreams all wilt
Im bound to the confines of my own mind
My sanity is slowly slipping out of my grasp
I’m just sitting here as life goes past

My mind is a tidal wave of pain
I’m drowning inside my own brain
I’m suffocating  in a sea of my own tears
But I can’t stop crying I’ve been doing this for years
My anxiety is crashing around my brain
Im engulfed by this excruciating pain

I have forgotten what the surface looks like
I’ve been drowning for so long
Swept away in a sea of despair
It’s Unfair I’m Tossing and turning
The waves pound me in my sleep
I’m screaming and suffocating but no one can hear a sound
I cant remember when I stoped swimming and started to drown