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I loved him —
more than anyone should ever love
someone who couldn’t stay
You were the only you
I ever had
and I never will again.
You
I never thought
those words I wrote
would matter this much.

I never knew
letting go
could tear me apart.

And I never believed
I’d still be here
remembering you.
I was the only one
who loved
and the only one
who broke.
All my memories ever talk about
is that one person
who left
somewhere in the middle of my life.
I always told you —
I’ll never forget you.
And I haven’t.
Even when I tried.
Even when I wanted to.

You were my happiness.
The one I looked for
in every room,
in every laugh.
The only one
I felt that safe with.

I said,
“After college, it’s just us.”
No more best friends
only you.
I believed that with my whole heart.
But I never imagined
that years later,
it would still hurt like this.

You didn’t leave with anger.
Just distance.
Just silence.
And that’s what stayed with me.

Now, it’s the quiet things
that bring you back
A line in a song,
a quote I once loved,
I can’t finish anymore.

They come out of nowhere.
They steal my breath
and put you right in front of me,
when I’ve worked so hard
to let you go.

I want to forget
just enough
to stop hurting.
Not the memories
just the weight.

Because you meant so much.
Still do.
But I need peace.
I need to stop crying over echoes.

You’ll always be a part of me
but not all of me.

I’m learning
to carry you lighter now.
Quietly.
Kindly.
And finally,
free.

—Me
Him
If my writing ever feels like poetry,
it’s because his absence still lingers
leaving behind beauty
in the places he once belonged.
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