Ayn: Poems

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Ayn Oct 2020

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Sliding through
a mountain of confusion;
My ghastly body shattering
the weakened illusion.

Crow’s feathers fall in reams...
This world really is
As sad as it seems.

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Ayn Jul 2021

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Scorching the clouds
Like a fuming inferno,
Only to be smothered
Without a moment to breathe.

Highlighting the bleak gray
With layerings of radiant white.

The purest form of energy;
Destroying all it touches directly.

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Ayn Nov 2020

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Wills,
Dragging beyond minds.
Paper,
To receive the soul’s signature;
An inken mark of individuality.
Ink to paper, fire to ice,
The continuity of the duality.

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Ayn Feb 2022

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Your faith in me
Scared off what’s left.
I thought I was free.
But you’re still a burden i heft.

You can never see this mess,
For I’ll hide it until the end.
Ill never be any less
Until my soul begins to blend.

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Ayn Jan 2022

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Echoes permeate the muffled air,
Bringing the song of life
To this old barren landscape.

Ripples in the water
Beckoning the snowfall,
Like the call of death
To an unsuspecting passerby.

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Ayn Jun 2022

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As the final wisps of daylight fade
Your eyes become so clear
And the dimly burning streetlights
Become the silent starlight,
Lighting our lover’s path dear.

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Ayn Aug 2020

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Leave me for the worms,
Run, or let me run.
I don’t care what you do.
I’ll only hurt you
By being here,
So you should just hurt me,
And save yourself
From a corrupt heart.

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Ayn Jan 2020

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Life chained me down with roses.
Gave me a forsaken heart attack,
Let my poisoned blood seep out.
And I watched it all fade to black...

Spinning round and round
For this endless eternity
On this infernally angelic
Carousel of bloodlust and agony.

Inspired by a song called “Bad Apple!!” (idk the original artist)

Jan.2.2020

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Ayn Oct 2020

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All the sighing ashes disappear,
Worries drowned out in my own fear.
An endless void lies inside their mind.
Any more defiance and I’ll go blind.

Leave me to be
For a lifetime now lost,
We all lived our wasted lives,
Until the cat’s path is crossed.

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Ayn Mar 2020

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Icy lakes
Freezing until tame.
Ashen snowflakes
Glimmering in flame.

Steadfast ice,
Atmospheric lights.
Blocks frozen twice
Into towering heights.

Aqueous infernos
Casting a flaming rapid.
A burning soul grows
A seed so trepid.

Water to grow the ice,
And quench the inferno.
The aqueous paradise,
Sitting among this rapid flow

I think the ending’s a bit weak...

#fire #ice #water

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Ayn Jul 2020

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As the creeping doubt
Draws shadows of trees
Onto my mind’s canvas,
I silently look away,
Wishing the water’s reflection
Could distract me.

Rippling across the surface;
Distorting what I see.
The inkwell’s matte mirror
Changing what I’m to be.

I’m tired. And a bit sad. But who cares? At least I’m writing it out.

#love #doubt #shadow #paint

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Ayn Jan 2021

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Shrouding every waking breath,
And stifling my sickened cough;
Weakening me.
Forcing broken promises,
And dealing only half-truths,
Making my regret vile.

I wish I could’ve met you,
I would’ve saved some face.
But your face is mine.
And your mind,
Well it’s on the same line.

There is no solving you.
Believe me,
I’ve tried it too.
Only in avoidance
Will I save myself
From your remnants.

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Ayn Aug 2020

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Maybe if I become the bird
To break the egg;
The world,

I’ll shatter the ice locking
My heart in place.

Throwing off these chains
Of human connection,
And hatching into a dove.

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Ayn Nov 2020

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Within unburdened walls
Lies the embrace of space
And it’s forceless relation
To the movement within us all.

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Ayn Feb 2021

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False whispers
Sounding alarms,
Poisoning the will;
Drowning the ill.

Pulling you down
Just to push you up,
And burrow inside you,
To be a viciously vicarious
Vile remnant
Of whats long gone.

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Ayn Apr 2020

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A world to repair
And a wrench in your hands.
The rusted bolt of despair
Has long since plagued these lands

Where are the birds that flew;
Through the sky, in pairs of two.
Where are the trees that grew;
With leaves and sap that stuck like glue.
The golden world’s in your hands too,
Why not make this gray sky blue?
Show us the world that’s true,
Bring out your natural hue.

Bring out our natural hue.

Inspired by the song “Flamingo”

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Ayn Apr 2020

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The persistence
Of silence
Resides
Inside
A web of individuality.

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Ayn May 2020

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Maybe life
Just wants me to suffer.
It’s not like anybody ****** up,
Because I’m already ****** up.

Maybe cool metal
Can freeze my sunburt arms...

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Ayn Jan 2020

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I would like to see
What would come to be
Of a moose and rabbit
Roaming free.

It is a rather stupid idea, you must think.
And i wholly agree
But where might the fun be,
If you cannot think freely?
I think of all, from the smallest flea
To the largest bee.
Or from the makeup of tar,
To the largest star.
It is fun to think,
That is what I decree.
But in real life,
The moose and rabbit would just flee

Sept.23.2019

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Ayn Aug 2020

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If I disappeared
Would you give a ******* ****?
Stop the ******* farce.

Ugh not gonna deal with this **** for much longer. Your wishy washy nature ****** me off a lot.

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Ayn Jun 2020

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The roses kneel
Before the trees
The shadowed reveal
Before the breeze.

The smell of rain
In the sky.
My tears are gone
And the well is dry.

Why am I welcomed
By burning pages
And culling voices?

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Ayn Nov 2020

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The stars all look brighter in the sky
Sometimes i get so lonely I could—

The darkest flares
Burn within the brightest bonfires.

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Ayn Jan 2021

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Laying newfound gemstones
Upon the fields of springtime citrus,
The sun rises once again.

We are here to witness
As the earth’s moonlight visage
Is burned away by the rising fire,
Leaving us free to start anew.

Hey, this is for a friend named s, and probably everyone else. Who I wrote it for isn’t important. It’s important to remember that sometimes all you might need is a reset. To take a nap during the day, or sleep through the night can help you a lot. Remember that. I don’t want anyone making the mistakes I have.

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Ayn Dec 2021

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The vile thorn
Piercing like an unseen razor.
Infecting the wound
Like a midsummer overcast;
Sudden and volatile.

It whips and warps you,
A slight touch of the thorn;
A graze with death’s finger.

Within my mind the thorn resides,
An affliction to my mind.

I am dull,
I am vile.

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Ayn Jan 2022

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Crawling through the wastes,
I wish for the flame.
To fly above the rest
To have nothing but a name.
My hope and interest
have kept this dream alive
And allow me to thrive
Even in these darkest moments.

Fire is purifying and equivocal.

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Ayn May 2020

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In time,
Sparks will fall.
Flames will roar
Over the shimmering horizon.
A well-done sky,
No way to return,
But one way to cry.

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Ayn Sep 2021

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Like a solitary tree in a silent plain
Awaiting the blight; the everlasting rain.
Life has come and gone;
The span of a second
With the grace of a swan
Like a shrouded mosaic
The mist reveals piece by piece;
A picture is formed
Of a concrete world,
Built on the fragile sands of time.

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Ayn Dec 2021

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How many small lies
Have I imprinted
How many are left?

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Ayn Dec 2019

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Oct.25.2019

Sammie, it annoys me
That you called my question sweet
It’s not you, it’s me.

What to think of it?
It confuses me so much
Know that I love you!

Christ almighty I forgot that I asked someone out to homecoming that day and got rejected in a really sweet manner that avoided telling me weather my feelings were reflected or not. It’s in a double haiku form. There were hundreds to choose from my drivers ed book, but this one was the least bad.

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Ayn Nov 2021

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The last streams of daylight fade away,
Like the frail afterimage
Of melancholic memories;
Drifting quietly like seaglass,
Submerged in an unfamiliar world.

I got nothing to add to this, so imagery is what it all is i guess.

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Ayn Oct 2020

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Maybe it’s not
A needle and thread,
But a voice.
One which carries words
On waves above a crowd.

Someone does need to weave words, but I now know that the truly unique people can do that, and then speak those words flawlessly. To ignite a spark of emotion that lights a flame of passion. That’s what I wish to be.

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Ayn Jul 2021

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Through the mist
A quiet voice echoes;
A booming announcement,
Following a silent predicament.

Calling upon the dormant engine,
Remembrance has arrived.

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Ayn Mar 2021

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As we listen to the silence,
A world of noise
Populates our barren mind.

We bring life
To the once subdued void,
Only to ***** it out
Like a whimpering candle
When we inevitably forget.

Me writing poetry at 12:30am lol. Time for some ice cream.

Edit: after rereading this in the morning, I realized I never ate any ice cream.

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Ayn Apr 2022

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Thoughts lie adrift, like the mist;
Fading into the dawning light.
With this hew sun, I am blessed;
Renewal will come when the time is right.
For now, I must spread my wings,
Readying my soul to take flight
And bask in the vernal sunlight.

I’m alive, so yay! Working on being better now, it definitely was rough for a bit tho.

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Ayn Jan 2021

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I’m the whisper
Among the piercing scream;
The subtle vertigo
Of an early morning dream.

I’m the darkest burning star;
Your wandering mind
When you’ve gone too far.

I’m the voice you could not hear;
The voice you should not fear.
Advice that most abhor,
Given with an air of valor.

Don’t follow my whispered suggestions,
All it becomes is bad recollections.

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Ayn Oct 2020

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Flowers mill about
The field of conceited sunlight.

For pleasure?
For knowledge?
No,
Forsworn.

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Ayn Feb 2021

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The tug,
The pull,
The snap.

Giving way to the fall.
Time, flowing like water
Among glittering beaches.

Darkness moves in,
But a flaming defiance
Rises like a screaming gale
Along the gap
Where the string once existed.

In the flames of renewal
A new string is born,
Holding back
With a grip like thorns.

Spiraling in and out
Of a fruitful Existence,
We stand on the brink of life.

Hi~ hi~ everyone! I was listening to some Bring Me The Horizon today, and I caught myself thinking what would happen if I just drove my car into a tree (while I was driving my car I thought of this). I knew it was a dodgy thing because I don’t know how fast before I die. In the end I figured out one thing. If I went fast enough, I’d be dying, blinking out of existence, but I’d be screaming to live, in every last cell of my body. This poem is to reflect that. I didn’t crash my car. I’m not dead yet *******! (Said in a joking manner)

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Ayn Oct 2021

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Like a stone in the ocean,
Or a drop of water
In glistening oil,
A hole begins to fester.

Deep within my core,
The inching shadow grips my fears,
Throwing away my desires,
And beckoning my tears.

I have no title for this. It’s definitely dark. All of my work is at this point. I’m in a tense national competition and today’s the last event. I don’t know know my competitors are doing because I can’t actually see them compete. But based on how well I think I’ve done, I have a chance.

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Ayn Dec 2020

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As guilt for my actions
Burns like a seeping acid;
Pervading every layer of my soul,
I wonder where I wasn’t whole.

Where did I stumble off track,
How much have I destroyed,
And what meaningful relations
have I cannibalized oh so brutally?

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Ayn Jan 2021

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Streaks of rose-gold radiance
Elevate the scarlet plateau.
Through watching skies,
And ethereal cries,
The peak of the world draws near.

When all’s said for all to hear,
A hidden motive is made clear.
There’s no reigning power
As pervading as our fear.

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Ayn Feb 2021

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Hold the rain;
Follow the fall,
Catch it before the splash.

Little umbrellas
Are all I have
Lay upon the grass
And feel the silencing grasp.

Live vicariously
Through my rain;
Through my pain.

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Ayn Jan 2021

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Youthful spring,
Slowly drawing itself towards winter.
We wish it would stay forever,
But time grows old,
As all things do,
And barren days
Arrive in a haze.

All seems lost and lifeless,
But hope is not yet futile,
Because spring lies beyond
The approaching horizon.

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Ayn Sep 2020

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The little widow’s weeping
Stopped my heart from beating.

The hourglass branded up on its spine,
Signaling the end of my time.

A teardrop stains my arm,
But that’s just the venom in my souls.

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Ayn Jul 2020

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How many more times
Will I die
Before I find life
In its scarcest places?

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Ayn Oct 2021

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He’s back once more;
The icy presence held at the door.
My heat is drained away
Like a fleeting fall leaf,
And all that’s left is an empty shell;
Something he wouldn’t sell.

Why all the meaningless slander?
I know you love me at heart.
There’s everything left for us;
A world of experience to handle.
Take my hand and I’ll show you,
You’ll see a world better than blue.

Get out of my head. You aren’t welcome.

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Ayn May 2020

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How
Many
More
Words
Before
My
Denial
Turns
To
Realization?

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Ayn Feb 2020

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This duality
Of my vicariously divine
Mental principality
Divides an entire world
Between the realm
Of heaven and hell.
Opening a foreign door,
seeing no more

Does this even make sense?? It’s talkin’ about how a split mind splits a world. The divided principality (one mind of a nation or planet of minds, unified by humanity) gives a divided worldview.

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Ayn Jun 2023

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The silence was inevitable, however, the light she shone soon became their harmony.

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Ayn May 2020

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Amongst a storm,
Inside the raging current,
Iridescent light
Shines once again.

Things are going
To be all right.

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Ayn May 2020

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The pages lie before me, still lined.
The night is stalking closer,
I don't need to mind.

A light lies beyond the wall;
A wall to block it's flares.
even in this darkness, I'll stand tall.

These pages have now turned blind,
it's too dark for them to see,
and no more are they lined.