To be honest,
What is it,
We construct promises,
Built solely on hope and lies,
Just to watch it fall...

Is this what honesty is,
Polite lies,
Created for the ease of every person,

Or to hide intentions,
Hidden behind a vail of promises,
Greed, power, fear, personal gain,

I pray I’m an honest man,
I hope that my Lies have not hurt,
I believe that  I did it to help,
I didn’t mean it to hurt someone,

Politicians can easily be blamed,
We are clean,
While everyone else is not,
No one and everyone is to blame,

I ask,
Are you honest,
Or is that a lie,
What is honesty then,

I go to work and I have had a good day so far, I’m on the bus,
Then it happens,
I think to myself,
        -Hopefully work will be the same, I have a lot of stuff to do. I hope I’m  going to make it on time.

I know I will because I knew I would get anxiety from not being on time,
        -I’m going to be late and my boss is going to hate me.

My breathing starts to become shallow,
My stomach starts to clench,
       -I wonder if my boss thinks I’m a failure in his eyes?

My stomach begins to hurt, Yet I continue to think deeper,
       -I hope that my boss won’t fire me as soon as he finds someone better.

I smoke cigarettes to get my mind to fuzz,
       -I wonder if he hates me?

The pain from my stomach becomes excruciating,
      -I think my coworkers think I’m slow.

I try to hide the pain to keep some pride,
      -Why are all the people on the bus sitting at the front, am I scaring them?

My breathing becomes very shallow and I forget to breath,
       -I need to get all of my assignments done soon.

I become angry at myself and I get off the bus,
      -This isn’t my stop, I’m going to late.

My hands are shaking as I am bent over in pain trying to light my cigarette,

One puff,
      -I’m going to be late

Two puffs,
      -I’m going to be late

Three puffs,
      -I’m going to be late

Four puffs,
      Relief

The deepest wound
is one inflicted
by the hand
that once caressed,
for it knows
where the softest
parts are…
A Broken Heart
    A Loved Heart
are not so dissimilar,
for they are both
the most fragile things
you will ever hold.

Hold them with care!

Anxiety anxiety,
O my anxiety,

I fear all and fear all of my fears,

Anxiety anxiety
O god my anxiety,

Distractions, distractions,
I try to fill my mind,

Anxiety anxiety,
O god please end the torture,

I’ll want to scream to empty my mind,
But I’m afraid of what  people think of me,
If it would actually help,

Anxiety anxiety,
Why do I think about everything,


Anxiety anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety,
anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety, anxiety,
anxiety...

The moon’s pale light caresses me
My desire wakes by the moon’s glow
Dreaming under the Willow tree
The moon’s pale light caresses me
Passion is ignited and set free
Dark lust leaves me feeling ******
I dream of him in naughty glee
My desire wakes by the moon’s glow

Kelly Rose
© April 8, 2018