I know a girl, whom I believe to be angelic.
She flew in one night from perhaps a heaven.
She set me free.
From a dungeon full of traps I could not flee.
Benevolent, wise and beautiful as could be.
This angel, pure as soy, I fell in love with.
But I a mere boy.
Tempted of sins, a number of seven.
My angel, my love from heaven above.
Bestowed upon me a gift of true, true love, with pain, anguish and all the above.
Her decision to leave me.
I'm sure even her angelic heart, which could only sing of joy.
Would sting with her decision to leave this dear boy.
Alas, her supple yet steady hands, leaving mine;
Set me free and made them a man's.

it’s crazy how I’m waiting again
just can’t get my head around it
i’m no longer anxiously chewing my lip
no more nauseating  summer saults in my stomach
i no longer kid myself that i won’t answer your call
i am resigned to my faith
pathetic girl so silly so needy
i am defeated just sadly tired accepting that i’m waiting again
routinely checking my phone.

I close my eyes
The darkness consumes me
I venture into nothing
Embracing the feeling
Wondering what waits
But I think I know…

All the walls are white
My mind didn’t color them tonight
But this isn’t the hospital
The stairs do spiral
But not because I’m sick

I walk up the contraption
Carefully placing each step
On my weightless legs
Searching for…
Memories a blur…
I’ve reached the top
He’s been waiting
I should have gone to bed early

I needed to be with him
Or was that my intention?
Do I even know this man?
He seemed so familiar
Just a moment ago
He seemed like…

He motions me through the doorway
I forget what was on my mind
His brown eyes are urging me
I clear the threshold

And now I’m outside
The grass radiates green
The sky oozes blue
The colors are so vibrant…
Wasn’t I on the second floor?
Where’d that man go?
I’m always chasing him around
He’s always telling me what to do
Always misleading me

There’s a redundancy in this nightly game
I wish he’d go away
But my mind wants me to remember his face
I turn back towards the door
He thinks he fooled me again
I’ll find him soon…

I walk through the strange meadow
Over the flat terrain
There’s a hill on the horizon
This stays the same
I walk faster
The hill is no closer
So much frustration
I hear his voice calling me over

I turn around
He is there
Wearing a giant grin
He’s won again
At least it’s somewhere beautiful
I’m not dwelling in a nightmare
But as soon as I’m content…

The ground drops out
There is nothing around but dark
I remember seeing his face
Remember him…
I try
And then I weep
A speechless dream
Is all he’ll ever be

Music playing in my head
and in my fingers,
through the light in my eyes
music in my elbows and knees and toes
music in my every glance, every thought
poetic expression
gently demanding respectful acknowledgement
My long hair, every hair
in silent awe of the music
my music
living, not with the shadow, but in the shadow
and around it and everywhere I am
Inside of me and my shadow
my darkest corner, it fears nothing
neither rejection nor criticism
music in my pulse
every drop of my blood, every movement
and When I Sleep...

And when I sleep it carries me away
it haunts me and protects me
fueling my every dream
my every word
my truest self

Music is my lover
passionate and comforting
It is my demon
torturous and consuming
And I worship it as it worships me
I need it as it needs me
the songs of my soul
the melody of my nightmare
horror, lovely horror
terrorizing my being
lifeless, empty I cannot be
for I am never alone.
The music shall be my love, my love
and the music shall be my love

"I do love you, you know, love
It's just too late
to do anything about it now."

Heartfelt words spoken
at the end of a day
that'd seen six heart attacks
come and go

Across the hours
your silence spoke volumes
marching time as it did through your pain

Eyes closed to the world
until those last words
spoken with such passion
as I steeled myself to leave

You grasped my hand
held it tight to your chest
your gaze like a cloak encircling me

Gravity carried my tears
anguish spotting the floor
yours a lifetime of sorrows
staining the pillow

How I walked away
I will never know
my heart breaking with each step

Death was expected
the very next day
already it was knocking
but you didn't open the door

Not for another
forty-four days
finally leaving wrapped in my embrace

Ready you were
after our time together
your room in the hospice
our port in the storm

We laughed and we cried
we talked and forgave
we journeyed far and deep

You had said it was too late
to show me your love
but truly it wasn't
you know, Pa

You did an excellent job
at the end of the day
and in your own way
my  life through

I may have nothing material
to remind me of you
but my memories will never fade

Let me take you to a place where the sun is shining.
Where there is no misery or agony.
Let me guide you home and get you out of this darkness.
Take my hand, I’ll hold you close.

Smile.

Come here, let's sit on our own.
There is nothing you should fear.
I swear I'll dry your tears.
Open your eyes, you're not alone.

We’re together in this.
I’ll scare your demons away, infect them with my light.
I’ll be there to catch you when you fall apart.
I’ll end your fright.

Laugh.

See the colors all around.
See the moonlight, see the stars.
Hear the silence, hear my voice
Let it be your only thought

Open your heart.
I'm coming in
I'm cleaning everything
Let yourself be free

I promise I won't ever hurt you
I’ll be your hope,
Your light
Your savior

I’ll pick up the pieces of your broken heart,
Glue them back together
I’ll keep them safe inside.
Let me keep you warm at night

I promise I wont let you down
Hush
Turn the lights back on
Feel my touch.

Take a deep breath, smell the flowers
enjoy the silence.
Lets lay here just a few seconds
Because there's no anger or violence

No pain or blood.
Can we stay here for hours?
I’ll wipe out every sign of pain you’ve ever had
I’ll end the sorrow that’s in your heart

Let me take you to a place where the sun is shining
Follow me.
Where there is no misery or agony
We’ll run forever

Let me guide you home and get you out of this darkness
Lets hide together, no one will find us. Not now or never.
See the moonlight, see the stars
See the raindrops as they fall

Hear the silence, hear my voice
Take my hand I’ll hold you close
Feel the wind, feel the peace
Feel the tears as they dry on your cheek

Keep on going, you're strong enough
Look at my smile
Listen to my words
I promise I wont let you down

Glimmering lights from the powerful skyline,
reflected like jet flames in the River Thames.
Lights multiplied by the flash of a camera,
capturing beauty in it's searching lens.

I wasn't so sure of here before,
but now I know there will always be
a place in my heart for this great city.
A home, a hub for the bustling race.

Some say mind over matter,
I say heart over mind,
but my heart has learned to love
that which my mind has made a matter.

She wore red satin
Dancing discreetly under stars
Love's hatches were battened
Riding in freshly painted cars
She swore off men
With big mouths and no ears
As she longed for her story to be told
To everyone, young and old

She came from ***** streets
Trash bins filled with beer cans
But she was born to keep a beat
Tapping, tapping her feet
Until everyone had gotten up from their seats

She works the stage
Like its the only thing she's ever known
Pacing and swaying
It's where she knew she had truly grown
A strong woman
With a heart of gold
Flowing hair of the angels
And a demeanor truly bold

Her daddy was a stern man
He'd come home
Still with drink in hand
Looking to pick a bone
But her face could calm
Even the most violent of men
Her occupation then was diffusing bombs
When she got older
And realized her life wasn't hers
She grew colder
Left her father
And became the killer
Everybody wants

I will have to gather
All my shadows together,
Not like an army
Defending my body and mind,
Not like a wall, stone cold-
No; more like: to find
What is left of the real things
In me.

Because look; it’s like this-
See: shadows are not shadows to me
Any longer-
Black is not black in the way
It is to others.
And white, in a sense, is not white
And I am not even fighting
Not even-
Writing about it.

For here is why:
Daylight makes edges too sharp
For their contours to melt.
So, as for my heart, I speak
Only to you-
Do you see them-
Do you see the shadows, too?

And even now-
Even this was not a question.
For it is only why I want to be
With you.