i will remember how you looked at me,
your deep, blue eyes burning holes
through me and how you gave me
every piece of you without any
second thoughts and how i offered
you what was left of me.

i will remember my cold feet
intertwined with your warm feet under
dozens of blanks and the feel of your
skin against mine, your warm breath
on my neck, your deep soothing voice
filling my ears, replacing the dull sound
of your records, the softness that intertwined
our fingers together and your tight grip on
my waist pulling me closer and closer to you.

i will always remember how you
got along great with my dad and
how he told me that he's never seen me
so happy before then
when i was sitting next to you,
wrapped up in your strong arms
or how you touched my face so delicately;
brushing a strand of hair away claiming
i had the most beautiful face you have ever
seen and i knew this wasn't true
but i let you win for once.

you pushed me and i fell,
but i know you just forgot to catch me
but that's okay; i'll never stop loving you,
my heart will never stop aching
or beating for you and the saddest thing
of all; i knew you never did quite love me
and i don't think you ever will.

o.c

I haven't been full
Since I don't know when
Or set foot in a mall
Since like two thousand ten
As for Christmas let's say
It's a good thing that it's the thought that counts

I don't have enough gas
To visit my girlfriend
I don't have enough cash
(I probably won't til the worlds end)
I can barely afford to get lunch at school!
So thanks Mrs. Obama for ruining that too!

I'm just so freaking sick of being poor.
I just want food in the fridge. Nothing more.

I have a boyfriend
I shout to myself,
Pinching my upper thigh
And blinking away from
The sight of them.

She giggles and I notice
Her laugh is lopsided
And she's too short
To be that loud.
Her shoulders are too far forward
And even I notice the
Gross stain on her
Upper left canine
Between her braces
That are bright, neon green.

She's my best friend.

I don't mean to think of her in that way,
I love her like a sister.
But it pops into the front of my brain
When I see them together.

I don't even like him
In that way
Anymore.
I have a boyfriend,*
And all he was
Was a whispered fifth grade crush.
That's what I tell myself.

He looks at her like
She's a million bucks.

Her crooked teeth
Earn her six cents,
In my opinion.

I take it back within a second,
But the thought was still there.

Jealousy makes me into a monster.

Millions have seen me this year,
But no one has noticed me.
Thousands have seen me this winter,
But no one has gotten to know me.
Hundreds have seen me this month,
But no one has cared about me.
Some have seen me this week,
But no has asked if I'm okay.
No one has seen me today,
Because I was not okay.

"Come over tonight,
I'm craving your love.
I'm begging for your touch,
I'm hungry for your kiss.
Baby, wont you come over?"

You put on his favorite perfume:
The purple bottle of Vera ****,
the one with the cap shaped
like a crown. Tonight, you're
hoping to be his princess.

Once you arrive, you walk right in.
He doesn't greet you at the door,
but that's okay. He never has.
You come to his room, he doesn't say
a word, only strips you of your coat,

your Victoria's Secret lingerie, and
your dignity. You go through the
motions of what seems like making love.
But you know you're putting passion into
something that is incapable of giving it back.

Your kiss is full of want,
his has no feeling.
Every touch becomes more caring,
but from him, its only a game.
You know that he doesn't want anything more.

When he falls asleep, you're left to
lie in the sweat, shame, and disgust.
You thought it was different this time,
but its never different. You can't refuse
his sensual offers, the stealthy ways of

getting all that he wants from you.
It isn't your fault, but it is.
Your constant requirement of love
makes it impossible to refuse him.
"Baby, wont you come over?"