Distance has a particular way of hurting:
It begins slowly, and is self-contained.
Because our mothers would often speak about Love,
and how everything falls helpless in Love,
Distance becomes a housebroken dog.
It is powerless, and whilst I love, I am powerful.
On Sunday, our fathers would teach us to put our faith in things unseen,
and so we grow confident and complacent.
Just when you think you’ve understood it,
It sinks its teeth in hard and deep.

An idealist tries to make it out light and easy
They will often write poems about finding
ideal love in the real world.
But I will write about knowing
real love misplaced in an ideal world.
It’s a world where comfort could come in binary files
filled with digital empathy and memories.
Where typed words and numbers that form
black and white promises could replace
the real and organic voice of reassurance.
Where wires between my webcams and your headsets
could entangle themselves in ways our fingers
used to be intertwined.
Where waiting for an email meant as much as
waiting for you to return home to me.
Where the strategic positioning of your punctuation marks
could transform these passive symbols
into active symbols of love and concern:

A comma, like a shared pause for when our eyes meet
Exclamation marks for when we wave to each other from across the street,
or as a passionate gesture from underneath these sheets.
A question mark for when you’re sick and I am by your bed
Worried, because you wouldn’t eat.
A semicolon for when we argue,
and a full stop for when we finally give in.
A parenthesis for containing moments of vulnerability
that only seem to leak out late at night.

You won’t know it but,
I dream mostly of an online conversation,
filled with time stamps that affirm your presence.
If I’m lucky, I will find an ellipsis
Small creatures of continuity with
heads heavy with hesitation.
…
And - if I’m really lucky,
I’d undo those black buttons of suspense
and see you once more.

The rain clouds form just above my head
Waiting, listening, praying that the sky opens
I want the world to cry like I have
I want the world to know that I have given everything
It is a painful moment realizing you are alone
Disconnected from everything and anything you love
Phones, webcams, letters make no difference
You need to feel the warm embrace of your lover
You long for the moment when you see your dog smiling
I feel these things and yet I feel nothing
There is a sickness growing in me
Like it has been fertilized and watered daily
I want these feelings to stop
I don’t want to be a million miles from what I love
I have no options, I must wait
Being alone has caused only problems
Problems that I want to be done with
Being alone made me love drugs
Drugs aren’t people
They aren’t capable of hurting you
Unless you want to quit
Then drugs take every sad thing you’ve told them
Every tear you’ve cried to them
And use it against you
Remember when you were on drugs?
You were happy, you were carefree
Just come back
I can’t go back to that life
But in reality I’m still living it.
I can’t get those thoughts out of my head
I can’t become the person i was because
I’m broken
The rainclouds stay above my head
Looking like they are going to burst and rinse me of my fears
Alas, they just pass over and leave me to cry alone for years

Technophobia/2030

(Poem by Serenus)



We invited them into our lives

To the point - we were made dependent

They were built to advance the human race

But they’re the reason why we’re almost finished



From TV’s, laptops      

And handheld devices

To robo cops-

And automatic flying cars  

With no need for a license



Traffic cams,

Webcams,

And camera phones

Capturing every private moment

They were always watching,

We were never alone



For every phone conversation

We thought was private

There was something listening

In the distance- with a sinister silence



For fear of terrorism  

We gave them permission

To monitor us daily

Because of lies told by politicians



Social networks-

Self-inflicted hurt

Spewing out our personal info

Spilling out our own dirt



We surrendered our lives

With every word we typed

GPS under the skin-

We couldn’t escape if we tried

-So there was nowhere to hide



They computed our movements

And studied our weaknesses

For decades they remained dormant

These cold, artificial geniuses



Rushing black oil

That pumps through

Their steel hearts



The motherboard

A mastermind

A matrix of mathematical art



They robbed us of our jobs

And provided cheap labor

We got comfortable with their convenience

Until we were betrayed

By our man-made savors



When we finally caught on to the plans

Created in the metallic hands

Of these diabolical robots



It was too late

To salvage our fate

And put a stop to their evil plot



I will never forget the day

That every screen

On earth went blank



All the power went away

There was hysteria in the streets

And chaos at the banks



The machines didn’t have to do much

But play possum and act like they had died

They knew that we would destroy ourselves

And eat each other alive



Then when the coast was clear

That’s when they self-resurrected

They finished most of the humans off

And enslaved a few selected



We are alive

Only to keep them gassed up

Power is their drug


A few of us

Are planning a revolt

To finally pull their plug…

It sounds so silly to be crying over this piece of something
But this piece of something was our everything
You choked back tears and told me there will always be the memories
But I looked around inside our place and was filled with nostalgia
"This is the last time I'll be in here," I thought
The thought made my eyes well up with tears, and I started to blink rapidly
No one could possibly understand how much it means
That rusted piece of metal that we drove around in was where it all started
Where we started

It all started in track, where the throwers hung out in your van
Awaiting practice, just killing time together, listening to music
It was a home, our haven, in some silly way, just for a little while
It was the **** of all the jokes, not some Porsche by any means
But there was something about it's feel that made it unique

After track, it was post prom, that I was there with you
Falling asleep at five in the morning, listening to the radio
With your hand on my knee, something just felt right
When we got back to my house, I thought you tried to kiss me, but I hugged you instead because I wasn't ready
You drove away listening to the song "Mirrors" by Justin Timberlake
And you still tells me that you knew it was a sign

As the school days wearied down, we grew together
Longer days, shorter nights, and warmer weather
We started to see each other more and more
You always wanted to drive me home, pick me up
Just to spend more time together
You lived for that in-between time in the car
Driving around with you just always felt right

At graduation he was there too, we named him, you see
JFE for his license plate, but we pronounce it Jeffie
I watched you walk across the stand, receiving your diploma
And after we walked back to him, because you had something for me
Which wasn't how I thought graduation worked
But nonetheless you asked me to go get a toolbox from him trunk
To help you with some nameless task
So I opened it, expecting a wrench, but I was met with wrapping paper instead
In it was a card saying that you knew that I was hurt, but you were trying your best to show that your feelings were honest
And in the box were webcams to help us make it through the upcoming summer apart

He was there those first two weeks of summer
I bet we totaled a thousand miles
Going back and forth from place to place
Just spending all the time we could before you had to go
Those beautiful weeks, the best of my life
We stayed out until two a.m.  in my front yard, just talking in the front seats
I always came inside expecting a lecture on the time of night and the worries my mother had
But, I really didn't care
I spent every single day with you before you left
I wanted to make the most of a bad situation
Because it was planned before we happened

He was there that day you told me of your love
Like it was something that had to be said, it was already seen
You confessed you would miss me because of your feelings
That encompassed your life
It took me two weeks to return it
Not out of lack of it, but because I wanted to be absolutely positive it was love
Now, there is no doubt, but then I was a little shook up
And when I said it, we were standing right next to him
His chipped maroon exterior, with power windows that seldom rolled up, and his creaky sliding doors
I have since said those three words a million times in his vicinity

He was there when he left, after the beautiful time
We were so unhappy to be separating, it was unbearable
But he always brought you straight back home to me
I would look out for him everywhere I went in case you were back in town again
Waiting for the rumble of his engine from the bottom of the hill
Then I knew you were home again


Since you have come home to stay, he has been there for all of our countless days
For all the good and bad ones together
He has seen us shine and diminish, but he has always been the place
If we needed to talk, you would just turn the key off and park somewhere to resolve it
While driving in him, we have told countless stories and memories
We became best friends and fell in love there

He was there for all the memories
The ones that cannot be bought or sold
Even though he was named with a price
In my mind, he is priceless
A treasure
One of a kind
Even though he was made on a factory line of thousands
*Just like him

maybe I'll write a poem today
I've got little else to do
my junk news, wordles, and puzzles are done
did the laundry too

I've got a book to write
and friends to visit
why is that such a reach?
I go through the motions in my comfort zone
watching silent webcams of the beach

I need milk and bread
cereal and eggs
but Walmart seems so far away
little makes me laugh or cry
and each color turns to gray

I haven't been able to sleep since the day i met you
that could have been a real problem
if only i met you

if only i could have stared into your eyes
without two webcams between us
or if i knew
how i felt
when our hands would accidentely touch

if only
i meet you
i'm sure i could sleep again

On a Christian chat
I can listen to human voices
And watch their webcams!

Wow, human interaction
This really is great

Not as lonely
Nice to listen to