Life passes through when im hear with out you,
I'm on a totaly different side beyond the out,
hearin all the ghetto my new ***** gotta dead bro,
I've bin with all these red rags mind graffiti sketched tags,
So I miss my girl my sister,
My story tellin listener
my main true,
my blessed  boo,
seen my life she has the real clue,
when I got hit right there stuck wit me,
step dad did uncalled for beatin, cant help me gettin eatin
when we got caught callit go book free,
played a role got your back,
look forward. erased the wack.
no mom,
I gotta stoney,
didn't lisson always roming,
growin with my one friend never was a loney
one two I got you,
three four I'm out the door
five six, new home cant fix,
seven eight, I lost my great,      (hailey)
nine ten, I'll be home when?.
when I got In foster so close I could of lost her
your my completion I'm your creation,..
ying to the yang
the big,
the loud,
The shoot the bang.
we never for the reppin but we ain't afraid to steppin,
got our own gang ,
me and hailey togetha daily,
our name no shame same heart from thee start
aimin for big,
bullseye I'm the dart
walk our own way,
head up with no say,
got my noes in the sky cause you know I be high,.
finger In the air for the ******* that stare,
why the ******* stalkin?,
cause you scared to be talkin,...
make out my way before i get cray
best get to walkin before I get sockin.
               whatever I'm a youngin,
I'm blessed that I hung in,

Life passes through when im hear with out you,
I'm on a totaly different side beyond the out,
hearin all the ghetto my new ***** gotta dead bro,
I've bin with all these red rags mind graffiti sketched tags,
So I miss my girl my sister,
My story tellin listener
my main true,
my blessed  boo,
seen my life she has the real clue,
when I got hit right there stuck wit me,
step dad did uncalled for beatin, cant help me gettin eatin
when we got caught callit go book free,
played a role got your back,
look forward. erased the wack.
no mom,
I gotta stoney,
didn't lisson always roming,
growin with my one friend never was a loney
one two I got you,
three four I'm out the door
five six, new home cant fix,
seven eight, I lost my great,      (hailey)
nine ten, I'll be home when?.
when I got In foster so close I could of lost her
your my completion I'm your creation,..
ying to the yang
the big,
the loud,
The shoot the bang.
we never for the reppin but we ain't afraid to steppin,
got our own gang ,
me and hailey togetha daily,
our name no shame same heart from thee start
aimin for big,
bullseye I'm the dart
walk our own way,
head up with no say,
got my noes in the sky cause you know I be high,.
finger In the air for the ******* that stare,
why the ******* stalkin?,
cause you scared to be talkin,...
make out my way before i get cray
best get to walkin before I get sockin.
               whatever I'm a youngin,
I'm blessed that I hung in,

Written   By   Jesse   Mckush   Dedicated  For   Hailey   *Haglund

So much pain, and whose to blame -
So much pain, and easy to say it wasnt me.
But if I look into the mirror of my heart,
And if I am honest with myself I will see
That much of the blame belongs to me.

How many times have I accepted the stories
Ive been fed, in the stories Ive read,
about them and me Who is them and who is me,
We call ourselves two nations but if we go back
we will find we are really brothers and sisters,
with the same father-Abraham

In this land  Palestine / Israel that we call home
That both nations consider that we own,
What was done then, created a rift so vast so painful.
Could Sarah then have known or conceived
That that her actions would continue for so long.
And would leave ripples of separation for her family.

How many times have I read the slanted news
That made me and my family right so we could make
our brothers in the wrong, and visa versa.
Is it possible now after so long
That we can change the path we walk along.
Is it so important to prove who is right and who is wrong.

It is not too late to change the state of mind,
To bring down the barriers that we have created,
To share the land and prosper, and return to being family.
All it would take is to remember Love to remember that
the separation starts in our minds,  
And that there are always two sides to every story.

We hurl rocks and missiles at eachother
We forget that we are hurting our brother and our sisters
We forget that children know how to play
And make up and return to love, a heartbeat away.
Two rights cant make it wrong if we remember eachother
Two wrongs remembered - separate eachother
It is time to recreate that what we have done wrong
And not one side or the other is totaly right or wrong.

4/20/17

This is a public service announcement.
Attention
There are cockroaches in the walls of your body
Mold in the ceilings of your eyelids
You cry so often they can't dry out.
We paint over them with makeup
we have no idea why
we think paint
will fix your roof
There's still mold
There are still cockroaches
in the walls of your body.
We called them butterflies to be cutesy
it's time we told you
they are cockroaches.
In this familiar metaphor
where you are a grand hotel.
You were actually an AirBnB
Someone decided one day:
"AHH **** it.
We can open our house
to strangers
for a quick buck.
What's the worst that can happen?
They rob us?
HAH!
what are they gonna take?
We got nothin'"
then you did.
And they did.
they smelt bad
brought their girlfriend
and ****** in your guest bedroom

I mean it was your den,
with a sleeping bag
But they ****** in there!
In YOUR sleeping back
And stole your coffee maker!
YOU DIDN'T EVEN HAVE
A COFFEE MAKER
BEFORE YOU STARTED BEING
A HOTEL
you bought that ******* coffee maker
for airbnb guests
and now look at you.
Spent more on ammenaties
then you made.

Should have gone to walmart
but no
you had to "buy local"

Yes
we are still talking about your body
And cockroaches.
That ******* tennant brought cockroaches
You don't know how
but he was from new york
so it was totaly his fault.

now you need to hire pest control

BUT WHO IN THE HELL
CAN CONTROL THE PESTS
IN YOUR GODAMNED BODY

Not you.
You buy local.
These hippies don't use pesticides
thats their whole shtick.
You gotta use dirt and pray.

So you do.
You open up the wounds they left
Or you found
Or made last night

And you shove dirt in them.

And I'll be ******
if it doesn't make the cockroaches
leave.

The voices in my head the fear of losing, the fights to my demons and the monsters inside my head, im trying to escape from my past, but something gets me down time at time, the fears the emotions i can't handle. Nothing gets right, i can't escape iam too weak too slow too much in pain. Why? Why is life so awful? Why isnt there any light in the dark? No end in the tunels of fear and darkness, every time i compleetly break down when the voices shout demons begin to talk and the monsters wake up. I see no way out. Pick up the blades,, do it, you've no way out.

ive the same body the same face and voice but my gohst isn't the same anymore from the inside iam a totaly different person. The monsters inside me picked my body for
                        e
                            v
                          e
                               r

it sent me to hell
it sent me to die
it made me lie
i try to keep it in a cell

it wont let me sleep
it wont leave me alone
it has an eerie moan
it made girls weep

it wont **** just me
now its black as night
never to see light
its a criminal to be

it plays a dangerous game
now it sick and twisted
their souls are listed
leaving me full of shame

my dangerous heart
i cant trust it now
its killing me inside
as i try to hide
for i will not bow

death shall come sweet
the pain is endless
im totaly mendless
as i listen to its beat

Yesterday you scolded me like anything
But now what your doing??
Is it you have planned everything??
Never Excepted
Even in your last message i felt your are leave
only at this time
But you have gone totaly