"suffucating" poems
go take out the trash, a little voice says
no, you reply
I'm comfortable right now
lying here on my bed in my pyjamas
but you have to, the voice insists
not now, you reply
I'll do it later
it goes on like this
it happens every day now
but you always answer
later
later now becomes much much later
you're getting more and more skilled
at ignoring the little voice
every once in a while it pikes up again
take out the trash
but you don't listen
you're too comfortable
too lazy
too tired
too anxious
too hurt
too anything
too everything
you never take out the trash
until years later
you have to vacate the space you're living in
and the suffucating amount of trash you've accummulated
becomes quite obvious
and now
you have to take out the trash
so you go and take out the trash
and you go
and you go
and you go
no end in sight
until you start to wonder
if it will ever stop
or if you're now trapped
in some kind of eternal hell
of taking out the trash
and you start resenting that little voice
that now utters something that sounds a lot like
I told you so
you should have listened to me
yes, you should have listened to that little voice
so now you start resenting yourself
for not listening to the voice
but the one question that now insistently nags at you
that won't leave you alone anymore
if you managed to hoard such a huge amount of trash
by just never taking it out
what does your mind look like
you've never taken out the trash there either
and you nervously ponder
how it will end
the day you will have to vacate that space
Jun 27, 2016
Jun 27, 2016 at 2:58 PM UTC
Drowning from inside out, choking up blood
Suffucating from these thoughts
I am about to succumb from this flood
You turned my beating heart into this knot
That i wish i was able to wrap around my neck
You made me believe in love when you seen I was a wreck
But you had no intentions of reciporcating
You sit there and watch me fading
It was all a lie, illusions that i cant make real
Doesnt change the fact there was truth in how you made feel
Now im the laughing joke, another game won
You get to walk away instead of dealing with the damage you have done.
So when i down this bottle to numb this pain
When i swallow these pills in hopes it takes me away
Will you remember my name?
Will you know that regardless of the heart wrenching throb inside
Regardless of the fact every one of your "i love yous" were a lie
That you were the name forever engraved on my heart
And i have meant everything since the start
That the loss of your love, your beauty
Was enough to trigger my insanity
So i hope you know even when im gone,
When laying in the grave this heartbreak dug for me
I loved you all along,
I just chose to be set free
Jan 4, 2018
Jan 4, 2018 at 10:20 AM UTC