'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
the frumious Bandersnatch!"
He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the maxome foe he sought-
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood a while in thought.
As in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came.
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack.
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
"Has thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Calloh! Callay!
He chortled in his joy.
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

pickneed habs in slunder covals
hicked and snayed at fair Medusa
agitated by her beauty
and the statues in her keep
all the while a stranger climbing
sword and shield upon his back  

by the entrance stood Medusa
as the pogwach sninckled closer
and the caliwhisps outgrabe
o'er the cliff she peered in wonder
at the beast's ascent towards her
gallow broamsmade in her heart

then, at last, he reached the cornice
rose and stood in briersome glaw
never facing fair Medusa
though the urge was thick and glarn
helpless there she stood in silence
motionless her angsome fra

all at once the blade ascended
snicker-snack and finished all
fair Medusa's life was ended
the wrickling beast now turned and saw
saw the pallid stoney visage
saw and wept in sloamy spow

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
    Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
    And the mome raths outgrabe.
"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
    The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
    The frumious Bandersnatch!"

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
    Long time the manxome foe he sought--
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
    And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
    The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
    And burbled as it came!

One two! One two! And through and through
    The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
    He went galumphing back.

"And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
    Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"
    He chortled in his joy.

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
    Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
    And the mome raths outgrabe.

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
  Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
  And the mome raths outgrabe.

"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
  The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
  The frumious Bandersnatch!"

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
  Long time the manxome foe he sought --
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
  And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
  The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
  And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
  The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
  He went galumphing back.

"And, has thou slain the Jabberwock?
  Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!'
  He chortled in his joy.

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
  Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
  And the mome raths outgrabe.

The ******'s Lesson

They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care;
They pursued it with forks and hope;
They threatened its life with a railway-share;
They charmed it with smiles and soap.

Then the Butcher contrived an ingenious plan
For making a separate sally;
And fixed on a spot unfrequented by man,
A dismal and desolate valley.

But the very same plan to the ****** occurred:
It had chosen the very same place:
Yet neither betrayed, by a sign or a word,
The disgust that appeared in his face.

Each thought he was thinking of nothing but "Snark"
And the glorious work of the day;
And each tried to pretend that he did not remark
That the other was going that way.

But the valley grew narrow and narrower still,
And the evening got darker and colder,
Till (merely from nervousness, not from goodwill)
They marched along shoulder to shoulder.

Then a scream, shrill and high, rent the shuddering sky,
And they knew that some danger was near:
The ****** turned pale to the tip of its tail,
And even the Butcher felt queer.

He thought of his childhood, left far far behind--
That blissful and innocent state--
The sound so exactly recalled to his mind
A pencil that squeaks on a slate!

"'Tis the voice of the Jubjub!" he suddenly cried.
(This man, that they used to call "Dunce.")
"As the Bellman would tell you," he added with pride,
"I have uttered that sentiment once.

"'Tis the note of the Jubjub! Keep count, I entreat;
You will find I have told it you twice.
'Tis the song of the Jubjub! The proof is complete,
If only I've stated it thrice."

The ****** had counted with scrupulous care,
Attending to every word:
But it fairly lost heart, and outgrabe in despair,
When the third repetition occurred.

It felt that, in spite of all possible pains,
It had somehow contrived to lose count,
And the only thing now was to rack its poor brains
By reckoning up the amount.

"Two added to one--if that could but be done,"
It said, "with one's fingers and thumbs!"
Recollecting with tears how, in earlier years,
It had taken no pains with its sums.

"The thing can be done," said the Butcher, "I think.
The thing must be done, I am sure.
The thing shall be done! Bring me paper and ink,
The best there is time to procure."

The ****** brought paper,portfolio, pens,
And ink in unfailing supplies:
While strange creepy creatures came out of their dens,
And watched them with wondering eyes.

So engrossed was the Butcher, he heeded them not,
As he wrote with a pen in each hand,
And explained all the while in a popular style
Which the ****** could well understand.

"Taking Three as the subject to reason about--
A convenient number to state--
We add Seven, and Ten, and then multiply out
By One Thousand diminished by Eight.

"The result we proceed to divide, as you see,
By Nine Hundred and Ninety Two:
Then subtract Seventeen, and the answer must be
Exactly and perfectly true.

"The method employed I would gladly explain,
While I have it so clear in my head,
If I had but the time and you had but the brain--
But much yet remains to be said.

"In one moment I've seen what has hitherto been
Enveloped in absolute mystery,
And without extra charge I will give you at large
A Lesson in Natural History."

In his genial way he proceeded to say
(Forgetting all laws of propriety,
And that giving instruction, without introduction,
Would have caused quite a thrill in Society),

"As to temper the Jubjub's a desperate bird,
Since it lives in perpetual passion:
Its taste in costume is entirely absurd--
It is ages ahead of the fashion:

"But it knows any friend it has met once before:
It never will look at a bride:
And in charity-meetings it stands at the door,
And collects--though it does not subscribe.

" Its flavor when cooked is more exquisite far
Than mutton, or oysters, or eggs:
(Some think it keeps best in an ivory jar,
And some, in mahogany kegs)

"You boil it in sawdust: you salt it in glue:
You condense it with locusts and tape:
Still keeping one principal object in view--
To preserve its symmetrical shape."

The Butcher would gladly have talked till next day,
But he felt that the lesson must end,
And he wept with delight in attempting to say
He considered the ****** his friend.

While the ****** confessed, with affectionate looks
More eloquent even than tears,
It had learned in ten minutes far more than all books
Would have taught it in seventy years.

They returned hand-in-hand, and the Bellman, unmanned
(For a moment) with noble emotion,
Said "This amply repays all the wearisome days
We have spent on the billowy ocean!"

Such friends, as the ****** and Butcher became,
Have seldom if ever been known;
In winter or summer, 'twas always the same--
You could never meet either alone.

And when quarrels arose--as one frequently finds
Quarrels will, spite of every endeavor--
The song of the Jubjub recurred to their minds,
And cemented their friendship for ever!

'Twas brillig and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves
And the mome raths outgrabe.

"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!"

He took his vorpal sword in hand
Long time the manxome foe he sought-
So rested he by Tumtum tree
And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwocky, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with it's head
He went galumphing back.

"And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"
He chortled in his joy.

'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves
And the mome raths outgrabe.

-Lewis Carroll

Why do mechanics need manuals when they’ve fixed it before?
Answer my question or I’ll walk out the door!
Didn’t they attend trade schools or get O.J.T.?
Why need repair manuals?  That what gets me.
I just want a mechanic who won’t refer to a book.
Just fix my car already, don’t give it a second look!

Why do pilots run checklists and reference their charts?
Just push the dang button and hope the plane starts!
Didn’t they go to flight school and pass all the tests?
Pilots fly most days, so who needs all that mess?
I want a pilot who knows without referencing a chart.
Just get on with the flying and prove that you’re smart!

What about the doctors who are practicing still?
Why can’t they get it right?  And that includes the bill!
They’re always researching new studies in journals
When time’s better spent attending patients’ internals.
I just want a Marcus Welby, Ben Casey or Kildare
Instead of keeping up to date, I just want them to care.

Why do lawyers review case studies and legal decisions?
Such antics in my book leave them open to derision.
All that studying in law school should have been enough.
After passing the bar they should already know their stuff.
I just want an attorney who’s a know-it-all ace,
Not a book worm mouthpiece to plead my case.

Finally, the poets, being wordsmiths their art
You won’t see them referencing a checklist or chart
But look, in their hands, just what can that be?
A dictionary?  Thesaurus?  Are those what I see?
A real poet never needs help reading Shakespeare or Keats
Using Webster and Roget would make all of us cheats!
If a poet is real, the words should just flow
I think that all poets should automatically know
The right words to use, and literary crutches forgo
How dare they try better vocabulary to hone
They should come up with good things to say on their own.
I’m looking for poets who’ll just know what to say
Like Lewis Carroll’s poems in his heyday:
“Twas brillig, and the slithy toves, Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogroves, And the mome raths outgrabe.”

Don’t bother looking up his words, for that would be a dumb thing.
Using a dictionary or thesaurus, you might actually learn something!

So I am in the process of writing a script to the sequel of 1951 Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. I have already contacted Disney to get approval to write the script and here is what I have so far. Alice falls asleep as in the first one, but this time, she's not alone. Her cousin, Johnothon goes to look for her and ends up falling unconscience and ends up in Wonderland himself. Alice is wanted for Treason by the Queen of Hearts and finds out that The Mad Hatter and March Hare are sentenced to be beheaded. Can she save them and escape Wonderland with her cousin as she did before?

"Alice's Return to Wonderland"

MARTHA:
Thomas, have you seen your cousin, Alice?

THOMAS:
Why no, Aunt Martha, I haven’t.

MARTHA:
Where do you suppose that girl could be? Have you finished your school work?

THOMAS:
Yes Aunt Martha.

MARTHA:
And your chores?

THOMAS:
They are done.

MARTHA:
Good. Help me look for Alice, will you?

THOMAS:
Yes Aunt Martha.

MARTHA:
I tell you, I cannot turn my back, without her running off. Check the riverbank. You know as well as I do, she spends her time there, nose pressed into those books of hers.

ALICE:
Where am I? Dinah? Dinah! Why, this all looks oddly familiar. What’s this now? Why, that’s me!  Wanted for treason by her Majesty the Queen? (Silently) The Queen. Oh, no! Not again!
CHESHIRE:
And the momeraths outgrabe!

ALICE:
Oh no! It’s you again!

CHESHIRE:
Well it most certainly not the white Rabbit. Which reminds me, now that the “Cat is out of the bag”, what brings you here after such a long time? Chasing more rabbits, are we?

ALICE:
Oh no, no. Those days are far behind me.

CHESHIRE:
No matter, it’s good to see you again. Welcome back.

ALICE:
I only wish I could say the same thing! And I hardly call this a welcome.

CHESHIRE:
Beg pardon? Oh! I remember now! All the trouble you started during your last stay. You’ve become quite famous here in Wonderland.

ALICE:
You mean the trouble you started. And I do not wish to be famous. No matter, I am not staying, I am going home. Straight home! Just as soon as I find my way.

CHESHIRE:
Your way? Have you not learned? All ways here, are The Queen’s way!  And she very well would have had her way with you, had you not woken up when you did.

ALICE:
That’s it!

CHESHIRE:
What? Do I have a flea?

ALICE:
No, no. I’m asleep! I simply must wake myself up!

CHESHIRE:
Oh but you’ve just got here!

ALICE:
I don’t care! I’ve had my share of nonsense to last me one lifetime, thank you.

CHESHIRE:
Well, if you insist. Oh by the way, you’re not asleep.

ALICE:
But I am! I must be!

CHESHIRE:
It’s not practical!

ALICE:
What do you mean?

CHESHIRE:
For example: if you were asleep, you couldn’t possibly feel me do this!

ALICE:
Ouch! What in the world was that for?

CHESHIRE:
To help me prove my point! If you were asleep, you would still be there, not here. Seeing as you’re here and not there, you are not asleep!

ALICE:
Oh dear! This is all so dreadfully confusing.

CHESHIRE:
Oh, I wouldn’t say that.

ALICE:
Of course you wouldn’t! You’re as mad as anything else here.

CHESHIRE:
Including you.

ALICE:
I most certainly am not!

CHESHIRE:
You must be! Otherwise you would never have come here. As I told you before, we’re all mad here. During your last stay, you associated with more mad people than I care to remember.

ALICE:
That’s it! The Mad Hatter! I think I’ll visit him.

CHESHIRE:
I simply would not recommend it!

ALICE:
I think I know what I’m doing. I’ve done it all before.

CHESHIRE:
That was before. Everything is different nowadays. As I said, I wouldn’t recommend it.

ALICE:
And why not?

CHESHIRE:
You won’t find him there.

ALICE:
Well, where is he?

CHESHIRE:
Who?

ALICE:
The Mad Hatter of course!

CHESHIRE:
It doesn’t seem to come to mind. Although, if I were looking for the Mad Hatter, I would try the dungeon!

ALICE:
The dungeon?

CHESHIRE:
Yes, he was sentenced to be executed by The Queen! He’ll really lose his head over this, if you know what I mean.

ALICE:
Oh dear! I’ve got to save him!

CHESHIRE:
While you’re at it, try not to lose your own. Speaking of which, will you excuse me one moment. That’s better. This thing is always popping off. And it’s no wonder! I knew I had a ***** loose.

ALICE:
Why you’re no help at all!

THOMAS:
Alice! Alice!

ALICE:
He’s no help. I suppose I’ll have to do everything on my own, is that it?

THOMAS:
Alice!

ALICE:
Now what do you suppose he wants now?

ALICE:
Well?

CHESHIRE:
Well what?

ALICE:
But didn’t you just call my name?

CHESHIRE:
Of course not! I was busy practicing a harmony. It’s a trio as a matter of fact! Composed by me, myself and I!

ALICE:
I know you called my name!

CHESHIRE:
No I didn’t.

ALICE:
Oh really? Then who was it?

THOMAS:
Alice!

ALICE:
That sounds like, Thomas! Thomas? Is that you?

THOMAS:
Alice!

ALICE:
It is Thomas! I’m saved! Thomas! I’m here! I can hear you! Where are you?

THOMAS:
Alice!

ALICE:
I can hear you! Where are you?

(Alice and Thomas collide into one another.)

Together:
Oof!

THOMAS:
Alice, where have you been? Where are we?

ALICE:
How did you get here?

THOMAS:
I’m not entirely sure. Aunt Martha sent me to look for you, and I found you sleeping against a tree. After that, an apple fell on my head, and that’s all I remember.

ALICE:
Oh dear.

THOMAS:
No, I’m alright, not even a bump!

ALICE:
No, do you know what this means?

(Thomas is silent.)

ALICE:
It means that you are asleep too! And that we’re both having the same dream!

THOMAS:
That’s impossible!

ALICE:
No it’s true! Nothing is impossible, especially here. I’ll prove it!

THOMAS:
Go on, go on.

ALICE:
Well, do you remember the Cheshire cat I always talked about?

THOMAS:
Of course! How could I forget? But what has this got to do with-

ALICE:
Follow me!

THOMAS:
Slow down, Alice! I can’t keep up!

ALICE:
Hurry, Thomas! We’re nearly there!

THOMAS:
What is this about, Alice?

ALICE:
He was just, now where do you suppose he went?

THOMAS:
Who?

ALICE:
The Cheshire cat! Oh never mind!

THOMAS:
Wait, Alice, I’ve got it!

ALICE:
What?

THOMAS:
If we’re really asleep, maybe we can just yell really loud! I’m sure Aunt Martha or somebody will hear us.

ALICE:
Hmm I must say I’ve never tried it before. I guess anything is possible.

THOMAS:
Let’s give it a try.

ALICE:
Very well.

THOMAS:
Aunt Martha!

ALICE:
Mother!

THOMAS:
Aunt Martha!

ALICE:
Mother!

JACK CARD:
Hold it men! I heard voices! This way!

ALICE:
Thomas, hide!

THOMAS:
What on earth for?

ALICE:
Just trust me!

DECK OF CARDS:
Hup hup hup!

ALICE:
You see?

THOMAS:
Are those, cards?

ALICE:
They are not your ordinary deck of cards!

THOMAS:
This is not normal!

ALICE:
Nothing here is! Wait, shh!

JACK CARD:
They stopped! Have a look around, men!

ALICE:
On the count of three, Thomas, we’ll sneak out of the bushes and make a run for it. Ready?

TOGETHER:
One, two three-

JACK CARD:
Well, well. What do we have here? Why, Alice! Isn’t this a pleasant surprise? Take a look at this men, she even brought a friend.

THOMAS:
Leave my cousin alone you oversized playing card!

JACK CARD:
You’re both just in time for tea with the Queen! She’s been expecting you.

ALICE:
No, thank you. I’m sorry but I haven’t got the time. We are going home! Straight home!

JACK CARD:
But what is your rush? You’ve just got here! We have some catching up to do.