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Slavica Apr 2015
Različite vizije
u istom spektru riječi
Gaslo ulično svjetlo
i ljupka narnijska lampa
Obasuti bijelim pahuljama
i zagrljeni crnilom noći
U pratnji borova
ili uličnog pločnika
S obzorom grada
ili netaknute prirode
Isti spektar riječi
Sličan spektar boja
Ali različite oči
Različito zrcale
Istih slova zvuk.
2014.
Mateuš Conrad Dec 2019
.the better part of a Friday night

grim.. times... what better way to pass a drinking session than to translate some Horace... i see no other worthy time-consuming scoop of any events to follow, this:

humano capiti cervicem pictor equinam iungere si velit et varitas
inducere plumas undique conlatis membris, ut turpiter atrum
desinat in piscem mulier formosa superne,
spectatum admissi risum teneatis, amici?
credite, Pisones, isti tabulae fore librum persimilem,
cuius, velut aegri somnia, vanae fingentur species,
ut nec pes nec caput uni reddatur formae.
scimus, et hanc veniam
petimusque damusque vicissim;
sed non ut placidis coeant inmitia, non ut serpentes
avibus geminentur, tigribus agni.

some first reading... sounds like chasing a chimera...

with a human head on a horses' neck: should a painter
tie the two together on a whim, and other limbs
collected from everywhere: puff up duck feathers into
a pillow or a bed cover - from "nothing"... hey presto!
that a beautiful woman from the torso up with a
fish's black tail below to boot...
on exhibition: would you, friends,
not burst burst out with laughter? believe: Paisans!
similar to this image will be the book:
in which as in an ill man's dream, in delirium,
the head and the feet belong to different
forms
i use this law and i recommend others to use it too,
but not to equate gentleness with a wildness:
with a bird a serpent, a lamb with a tiger...

angels and mermaids... what is no less or... no more:
improbable? perhaps neither...
but in the guise of monotheism... everything is still
somehow sensible...
where there was: half and half...
what angel of monotheism is a half and half
when contending for existence among unicorns...
mermaids or centaurs?
a chimera and a cyclops... **** with a minotaur...
but... such events of monotheistic grandeour are...
supposedly the better respected...
for all the respect i gave unto Knausgård -
because it comes from monotheism:
an angel is to be seen as more than a mermaid...
perhaps... if the angel is of my form...
has the wings... but for its mouth?
a pecker mask... a 50:50 share ratio of...
what a racial "mongrel" would otherwise burden his
shadows with...
a pecker mask akin to those masks
worn at the Venice carnival:
doctor doctor black plague masks...
with a muffed-up speech... as if shouting into
cotton puffed up...
esp. cotton candy...

and this is a sort of friday where i'd much prefer
translating latin... god... where did all these modern
prepositions and conjunctions from from:
into the fore?! there's only one song of worthy summary...
the specials - ghost town.

- Autorank Total 10 ( higher is reduced to 10 ), professional similarity 10 (of 10), concrete vs abstract 2 (of 2), noun/verb/etc order -0.7 (of 1) -

poetry and order... yes...
yes... very much akin to rhymes...
and very formal language...
but this is hardly a "micro-aggression",
on my part...

it's funny that i never paid any attention to this detail...

hoc erat in votis

i was never into brian jonestown massacre, more of a dandy warhols' fan, but then brian jonestown released the album aufheben and pawns of the palette started picking up not only seminal citric acids and kashmir's spices, but sharp grooves of some distant geography, which of course, all in all: to my liking.

there's nothing like listening to the opening
track of the aufheben album (panic
in babylon, instrumental) and reciting a
bit of horace; should i be accused of sounding
pompous, here's horace himself

    hoc erat in votis: modus agri non ita magnus,
    hortus ubi et tecto vicinus iugis aquae fons
    et paulum silvae super his foret. auctius atque
    di melius fecere. bene est. nil amplius oro,
    maia nate, nisi ut propria haec mihi munera faxis.

    it was the aim of my wishes: a snippet of arable land,
    a garden, in the vicinity of my house a source of
    fresh water and a grove upon a ***** of a hilly eminence.
    the gods beyond their intentions bestowed upon me
    the loot of my thus lived fate. i have enough!
    i do not implore for more either in this heart of mine
    or among incense or blood of sacrificed bulls at the altar
    where worship is prescribed unto them, but only give me,
    son of May, the chance to use these bestowals.

(translated from polish, and, as would be expected of me,
involved in translation, adding something of my own,
as you can see, the latin prepositions and conjunctions
are reflective of the number apparent in the english language,
but it's hardly a concern with other words,
awaiting a unanimous - not necessarily an N between
two vowels, or because of H, as is exampled by
a great alphabetical distancing of the vowels,
or simply because of the latin tongue-twisters of
the grapheme æ and œ - awaiting a unanimous
decision of the compound words stalled by the hyphen
form, e.g. light-bulb / lightbulb (underlined as a spelling
mistake) by the oxford dictionary committee...
but let's not get as crazy as german spelling
glue... it would make james joyce pale even by finnegans
wake standards of the 100 letter word... i know... english
is a language spelled like shotgun shrapnel, and german is spelled
like a wedding cake or scottish fudge, thick and bulging;
what was i going to say? i took a step into the heraclitean
river and the river took me elsewhere, the ice cubes
in my whiskey citric barley are melting, and i dream
of venice being the modern atlantis along with the maldives).

elsewhere in a grammar lesson:

people think the pinnacle of poetry is coupling
adjectives with nouns, but of course,
given adjective & verb coupling is commonplace:
and when they say poetic v. practical,
they then say the hidden practicality of poetry
via, e.g. 'nicely said;' but of course!
we need a sombre musicality of the tongue
with so much dead machinery around us!
the elders complain about headphone "zombies,"
marching like urban myth lemmings on zebras
toward death... but have you actually listened
to those mechanical sounds on concrete?
horrid! when was the last time you heard an owl's
call in the dead of night in a forest? me!
about a year ago: three by my count.

- Autorank Total 9.9, professional similarity 10 (of 10), concrete vs abstract 2 (of 2), noun/verb/etc order -0.1 (of 1), cliches -2 (of -3) -

the Cyber Pavlov Experiment

and my favorite "poem" in this ranking system,
which, i guess is an a.i. calculator...
i'm most interested in the professional similarity,
i can understand the concrete vs abstract ranking...
but the noun/verb/etc order?
in poetry? again... this is not a "micro-aggression"...

so, i'm on this page, and i meet my ****** pusher,
sure as hell he's pushing ******,
although it's digital, the site / street corner?
allpoetry.com i get to publish 2 poems,
but can't publish more, i have to comment,
and comment positively,
'allo comrade Stalin! then comment on
2 poems, and get this message:
Congratulations, you've achieved level 2,
and are now an "emerald cat"!
To reach the next level you need:
7 x comments, 1 x enter a contest, 1 x favorites,
1 x edit an item. • What are levels?
i am not playing candy-crush saga!
i'm not! i'm not even kidding you,
what is this ****?!
we've been ****** by paedophiles
anonymous?!
                      please get me off
this ****** grid of the Cyber Pavlov Experiment...
likes and comments and saliva and cookies...
    or premeditated minority reports -
  akin to Orwell's thought crime gestapo -
    god it sounds **** when said: g'eh'sh'tap'oh.
                    or how to use the internet
akin to deciphering and censoring established
media outlets...
                              obviously social media
can't replicate socialism, it's a media outlet,
                  but it can for sure ******* with
all the little capitalistic mind games that lead
to nothing but the Pavlov experiment -
            and that was with dogs...
try that with a ******* Gorilla and i'll watch you
cradle prosthetic limbs while
he rips your original limbs off like he's playing
                a harp:
            then you can rhyme: twinkle twinkle little thumb,
    how i wished you were attached to my hand to my arm
to my torso...
                        that's the same story
we had recently concerning a Mr. Kumbuka...
  who escaped enclosure, and proved the a.d.h.d.
        complex correlation with exposure to
sugar... ****** drank 5 litres of concentrated blackcurrant
squash replying: i'm mad at the keepers for keeping
me on a diet! i do king kong and you do the frenzied
blonde maiden.
              it's still a concern for me that they herded the poets
into an area worthy of zoological inspection,
                meaning that they base their worth on
    deplorable points system: like they're immigrants
waiting for visas to Canada -
                          comment, like, blag and blabber your
way into that new country, known to all of us present
              as Si S / Silicon State... by my count that's
the 51st, or the secular version of the Vatican.

- Autorank Total 2.3, professional similarity 1 (of 10), concrete vs abstract 2 (of 2), noun/verb/etc order -0.7 (of 1) -

but now... i'll just post the most "pop" poem from
here-on-in there... for that hard-on autorank...

clues as precursor:
- Strong words: army, audience, beef, box, brick, canvas, cubes, eating, fan, fares, football, lines, match, minced, outside, people, poem, poets, river, scrabble, scroll, short, slab, song, steak, striking, stripes, tartar, tomatoes, wave, writing  
-Weak words: albeit, always, answer, any, bad, be, become, bothered, circa, coherency, could, critic, deliberate, effect, eh, elsewhere, enough, escape, event, form, gather, get, had, happen, hardly, impact, intent, international, invent, long, merely, mind, modest, national, never, nice, nothing, perhaps, personally, presume, question, rarely, reason, recluse, repeating, repetition, somehow, sometimes, started, subconscious, subsequently, succumb, tender, thinking, translation, treat, understand, version, very, want, was, well, what, will, worth, would
- Cliches: to be a, i want

****... too early for an autorank...
so here's a pre-scriptum i wrote for...
what i wanted to feed the autoranking system...

this poem has circa 11 thousand views, "elsewhere"...
and i just... would like... to see the score for it...
the very and repeating: twist on the rotten tomatoes' score
"leverage" between audience and "critic" scores...
i gather that the autorank on this canvas is not...
somehow "deliberate"... i presume i have this slab
of minced beef... and when i put it through...
i'll get... a nice cubism version of a ripe steak: medium rare...

then again: i was always a fan of rare...
mind you... it's never raw, it's not tartar cubes...
it's rare... like the person eating... a rarified recluse example:
like a recluse of a rarified worth of all examples given...
this noun/verb/etc. "coherency" score...
perhaps this a.i. scrutiny hasn't bothered to answer
to no asked question... people can still "un-scramble"
or... un-scrabble bad grammar and understand it...
nothing ever has to be: brick on brick like a long
winding river...
it sometimes can arrive at us...
"lost in translation"... some people speak some
languages with no ill-intent...
they just can't escape the pedagogy rubrics of
subconscious grammar layer upon layer upon layer...
is this... a reason to subsequently rhyme?
personally? i treat rhyme as a phenomenon...
a phenomenon that has to happen rarely...
and when it does: it has to be a striking "pose"...
but enough of the pre-scriptum...
i want to see how this poem fares in the autorank filter...
albeit, this given: this pre-scriptum will have had
an impact on the score...

line repetition, eh? the lines are too long or too short?
what was that poem... when you could somehow
invent: "thinking outside the box" of any form,
or when tender poets started to succumb to the cascade
effect of writing - to merely fill-up scroll speed and space?
it's hardly an event like the mexican wave at
a football match... or how...
the white stripes' song: seven nation army
has become the international... well... that's modest...
the national (english) football clubs' anthem...
when a goal is scored... or whatever you like, otherwise...

or cliches... really?!
how about... oh... i remember this one most fondly...
visual poetry...
fallen... by... jörg piringer...
and unlike any modern painting...
this one really does require a description,
as cited on poetryfoundation.com:

/jörg piringer works in many forms, including visual, digital, and sound poetry, as well as music. In "fallen," piringer combines a visual sensibility with computer programming skills to tumble text from the English translation of The Communist Manifesto into a pile at the bottom of the page. The result is a mass of letters stripped of their original meaning and representing the failure of an idea./ Geof Huth

and no, by no kind reprint...
perhaps modern painting is what it is...
because... there's an alternative, like fallen?
if you can "paint" with words in adverts...
and paint i imply: stress the psychological impact
of coca-cola written in circa: formal scripts -
(why no italics? you can't... just can't,
write a colon and in italics after...
the colon represents emphasis,
as does the italics... tautology or something -esque)
derived from 17th century handwriting...
or... say... volkswagen... written in blackletter &
lombardic scripts... esp. circa 1935...
while all the propaganda posters were on
display...

given all of this? well... do i have to somehow:
bemoan how terrible modern art is?
cubism is not cricitißed - but dada is -
or let's call it... the most bloated
menu of culture citationand)
Barnett Newman painted this masterpiece,
‘Onement VI’, in 1953.
it sold for close to US$44 million...

i can't say such painting is "good" or "bad"...
after a while you just have to call a spoon a spoon...
a knife a knife, a table a table...
onement vi? blue canvas with a straight line
down the middle; form? rectangular...
and that's when thinking can take place...
i gather than modern art is trying to depict:
primodial man acquiring geometry...
after all... only recently i cound the difference
between the western man and slavs...
how the afro-european now lives in germany
and the west... including italy...
and how the indo-european lives east of germany
in some parts of scandinavia and greece...
a totally new discovery...

but... but... i can compensate for modern art...
with what is visual poetry...
if jorgen schmoorgen can do an abstract of a communist
manifesto... here's my take on...
John Constable... because... frankly...
i have yet to properly deal with this particular piece
of writing - as it's fresh... to subsequently aspire
for... a j. m. w. turner... not yet... not yet...
as ascribed to Juba...

the poem itself is... good grief...
always the same with me...
i go to kenya and i'd want to **** all the ivory
beauties...
a mother is in hospital and all the nurses
are black and i'm like...
what a clean and sterile environment this
is... unlike my today which began
finding an acne dot on my little richard...
(i get the joke... spotty ****)...
having to defrost a fridge freezer in
the shed because:
'z przybytku głowa nie boli'
oh yes it does...
not when what someone deems to be
"enough" do you have to count the trivial...
unnecessary things...
which is not a shame regarding my ***
winning a pulitzer price for... never mind...
i claim lack of sun...
black privelege... impeccable skin...
and... ivory beauties...
n'est ce pas?
alternative i have found an outlet to...
it's become brutally boring...
*******...
i found it... in... japanese gravure...
i had to... esp. when 1970s italian *****
classic died... and everyone is doing
this act older than beer and the giza
pyramids... phellatio and you're like:
so when did the ice-cream dream go away...
the peeling the banana...
and all this ******* gagging begin like
there's everyone with their third tonsils
removed... where mouth is no different
from *** or **** to be RAMMED!
lucky for me i still have my third tonsil...
which means i can drink cold beer in winter
and not get a soar throat...
- lucky for me i still have my *******...
god... if i didn't... i don't think i'd have
the "moral compass" to "get away with it"...
unless i was a woman with a web-cam...
in which: it almost becomes akin to reading
a book... it's like: it's there for the sole use of
pleasuring yourself or... as i like to call it on
throne of thrones (the toilet)...
first you do the no. 1, then the no. 2...
then you start doing the no. 3 to see...
whether you've done no. 2 completely...
it sometimes happens that having an *******
dilates the **** to the point where:
there's a shady **** loitering in the "back"
somewhere... which would explain ****-erotica...
in reverse to the act of ****-erotica of being
penetrated... i.e. in this scenario...
finishing doing a no. 2...
after that? downhill a quick side-step for
a no. 4 in the shower - baptism...
but... yeah... the men that shame men with
regards to *******?
they must be circumcised men...
shaming other circumcised men...
i think to think how a circumcised man
could shame an uncircumcised man for this act...
that's like... circumcised women...
shaming uncircumised women...
for jerking off with a web-cam...
uncircumcised women and...
explosive libido... whatever the stereotypes
are... circumcised men...
uncircumcised men...
there has to be a: a priest a rabbi and an imam
walk into a bar joke around here somewhere...
i'm trying to find it...
but i have found that: circumcised men
shame other circumcised men over *******...
while the uncircumcised men are like...
if only i were a woman and had a webcam...
if society had a niche consumer base for that...
"sort of thing"...
i'd be making money from one
genocide of a fraction of myself ever so often...
i.e. it's killing when the ***** is owned
by a woman (sensible... sensible...
i don't mean the former chinese 1 child
state policy of: statistics at all costs...
even at 8 months old)...
but if that's the case...
then a session of hanky-panky...
sterile... washing under the ******* etc.,
i'm practically doing erotica-genocide
slim film no. 3890... ever since it started aged
8... when i discovered Onan...
way before the white nation army came out
from the hades of the *******...
how the ******* of ***** has nothing
to do with the ******...
the muscles and nerves are wired so to the brain...
that i'm pretty sure a castrato feels
the same...
**** chicken shaming...
it must be circumcised men against
circumcised men: ******* missing olympics...
no wonder... you peel a ******* potato...
you have to throw it in some water
to prevent it from darkening...
that's of course: prior to cooking...
so you have to find the ****** cushion
brigade from time to time...
a "sword" without a "sheath"...
rust or egomania or: motivational talk talks...
because Kant was never going to be my:
bachelor of the year for the 215th time in a row...
kierkegaard famously didn't marry...
erectile "dysfunction":
not a real problem in my own company
or in the company of prostitutes...
but a serious ******* problem among
the "free women" of western europe...
it's like one of those vague "superpowers"...
women speak of turn-ons and turn-offs...
yeah: i too have my limp switch too...
somehow... this "thing" is not automated...
it's not like spam-mail... it doesn't always:
"rise to the occassion"...
the mood swings of my *****...
i'm starting to think that perhaps neurology will
explain more about my brain
than my suma summarum will ever tell me
about this excess of the 21st digit (which
of course includes the 10 precursor toes)...

as i haven't read marquis de sade in a long while...
and i'm not touching any modern erotica,
and ******* bores me
and how japenese gravure is the next best
all-spice of brain fever...
and how: if this little harlot went to sudan
for her nitty-picking a tartan lover,
or if she decided for rwanda...
i have to guess the fiction and fantasy...
for me, at least... has to rely on...
a bull in a porcelain shop...
or as the kama sutra says:
a rabbit **** is hardly going to ****
an elephant ****... lengths and depths...
all round!
which makes you wonder...
genghis khan must have been...
or has to be... the ***** envy shitlord
of a whole lot of people with the surname
Khan in pakistan.
Saša D Lović Apr 2015
1.


еtеrnа је nеrvоznа
ništа nе оstаје dа је pоdsеti
nоgаvicа јој sе prеsаvilа
prеkо cipеlе
i
оnа sе sаginjе dа tо pоprаvi
ispusti tеški uzdаh
јеlе su јој sе sаrmе i
nаmаh sе sеti srеćnih dаnа
prоslаvа nоvih gоdinа slаvа rоđеndаnа
kаdа је u slаst
gutаlа јеdnu zа drugоm


2.



еtеrnu bоli zub
оnа uzimа gutljај ljutе kоmоvicе
nе bi li јој dеsni utrnulе
аli kоmоvicu gutа i
bоgаmi јој sе оslаdi
nаpi sе zаbоrаvi nа zub i
uzе dа vеzе
dоk је nе sаvlаdа sаn
usnilа је pоtpunо isti sаn
kао i lаnе kаd је zаbоlео
isti zub
kаd јој sе kоmоvicа ljutа
prоklеtо оslаdilа


3.


еtеrnа nе znа dа plеtе
niје znаlа ni njеnа mајkа
ni njеnе mајkе mајkа
dоk је mајkinе mајkе mајkа
plеlа pа rаsturаlа
јеdnоm је оficiru čаrаpе
tаkvе isplеlа
kаd bi ih izuо dа pеrе nоgе
аluminiјumski lаvоr bi sе
rаzgrаđivао
јеdnоm је svеštеniku mаntiјu
tаkvu isplеlа
svеti је trifun sišао dа је
оpipа

4.



еtеrnа nе mаri ni zа štа
оnа znа
kаkо је nаš nеmаrni svеt
dо оvоg stеpеnа
stvаrnоsti dоšао
nеbо sе bilо stuštilо а
vеtаr оkrеnuо kа njој
njеn је krеvеt u sеnci i tu је
kuršum nе mоžе pоgоditi
nе bојi sе оnа kuršumа
bојi sе оsа
kаd zоrа zаrudi krеnе prаvcеm
sаmо njој znаnim i оsinji mеd bеrе
sа bеsnim gа vukоvimа
sirоtа dеli


5.


еtеrnа izbаvljа iz ništаvilа mnоštvа
оnе bеzimеnе lutаlicе
svаkоg sе čаsа prеtvаrајu u sеnkе
pоslе tоgа igrајu šаhа
ili piljkе
u prvо vrеmе zаistа оsеti niјаnsu
sаmаrićаnskоg zаnоsа
sprаm оnih kоје је izbаvilа
umisli dа је znаlа vrаgа
i nаlоžnicu mu kоја sikćе
nе uzdišе vаljdа niје ludа dа šаpućе i gоvоri
јоš i tо јоš i tо
оnа niје krivа štо је nаstrаdаlа
bistrо оkо sni

6.



еtеrnа је tip slučаја
dаt i оdrеđеn uzеt pа vrаćеn
pоkоpаn pа iskоpаn
tе nоći kаd је iskоpаšе
nа smrt је prеplаšilа vеrnоg slugu
оn uz оčеnаš nа kоlеnа pаdе
pоmilivа gа оnа pо kоsi
prеrаnо оsеdеlој
zаglеdа sе u nеbеsа krоz
krоšnju drvеtа оrаhоvоg
nаrаvnо
ništа оd nаmеrе njеnе nе bi
stоgа sеdе
uzе sаmа dа sе nаslаđuје
gurnuvši ruku mеđu butinе
mеđunоžје rоzе dа mаzi

7.



eterna ne tako često
gleda ih gde sede u uvalici
njih dvadesetat i glancaju granate
a dole na otvorenoj pruzi
zubima je pokušavala da otkine šinu
potom se nalokala grozne vode
sa stanične česme
pa bi sedela ruku zavijenih
u praznoj čekaonici
voz je stigao veoma proziran
prvi put
dok je odlazila sa osmejkom se okrenu
dovikujući s vama je gotovo gotovo gotovo
Slavica Apr 2015
Ustajali grad
Smrdi na puna usta i
prazne želuce.
U pete grada urezane su
propuštene prilike i
strahovi sadašnjice.
Uklesali su ih drhtavi prolaznici
svojim nesigurnim stopama.
Kamo ideš, putniče?
Koračaju li tvoje misli sadašnjošću
ili prošlošću?
Ne srami se.
Svi smo mi manje-više isti.
Udarac palicom osjetit će i najtvrđa glava.
Ljudi zaborave trenutke
u kojima si mirisao.
Ne srami se.
Baš te pamtit će
ustajali grad.
2014.
isidora mitri Jan 2019
daleka su duboka mora u nama
o srčane obale udaraju talasi samoće
na hladnim se vetrovima njišemo
suvi su naši pogledi u tami
zimsko nas nebo posmatra
hodamo nemim ulicama noći
u nama ledeni bregovi plove
pričaš mi o snegovima koji su tvoje gradili
pričam ti o brodovima koje su moji potopili

u glasu su nam zarobljeni snovi nedosanjani
u grlu nam se guše reči nedovršene
neostvareni zagrljaji plaču između nas

u kasno svitanje rastaju se naši strahovi
među senkama spava tanani sudar usana
u novom jutru ostaju isti sami svetovi
tvoj
i
moj
december 27th 2018
Donall Dempsey Mar 2020
1966 -AND ALL THAT!

Asks me up for
a snifter...so she does!

"Don't mind if I do!"
I all cocky like.

Knowing I am in
for a bit of the other.

But when I get up
find she's a history buff.

The Battle of  ****** Hastings
runs around her living room

in some  boring Norman
cartoon in full colour.

Whoever did this
wasn't a very good drawer.

She does that trick of
removing her bra from her sleeve.

I love it when a bird does that.
"Glad to get out of that!" she smirks.

It lands on the bird cage.
The parrot goes nuts.

Opening skirmish methinks
in the battle of our wills.

OK I admit I'm a bit like Alfie.
Michael Caine but slightly fatter.

On the couch  - her mini riding up.
Sneak an arm around a shoulder.

Getting bolder - place a palm
upon a fishnet thigh.

But she only wants to talk about
Harold and how he lost the battle.

My libido shattered.
"Hic **** Rex interfectus est!"

That famous feigned retreat
that led to the rout.

Was it feigned or not?
I couldn't give a ..!

And that was one in the eye
for that Harold geezer -  or was it?

The Bayeux Tapestry
tells no lies or does it?

When is a tapestry not a tapestry?
When it's an embroidery.

She tells it as if it was
a close run thing.

"Like this year's FA Cup
when the Owls lose a two goal lead

and the Toffees beat them
3 goals to 2.

"Stand up if you won the war!"
One can imagine the chant.

I understand it when
she puts it like that.

And the geezers on the hillock?
Were they placed there before or

after the famous running away?
Her eyes brim with tears.

And it's this passion of hers
that draws me in.

That and the devil
in the details.

Like the ******* putting on
his chain mail the wrong way.

Or the Papal ring
with the tooth of St. Peter

hidden underneath its stone.
How do they get these things?

Or Haley's Comet streaking
across their skies.

"Isti mirantvr stellam"
she whispers to herself.

One can imagine a commentary on it,
"They think it's all over...well...it is now!"

But she still goes on and on
about it...refuses to let it go.

Finally she gives over
and gives in.

A one night stand.
I admit it.

But a one night stand that's
lasted 30 years now!

On our purple anniversary
I give it to her.

She thrilled
to bits.

Hill and Rumbles's
"The Defence of Wessex:

The Burghal Hidage &
Anglo-Saxon Fortifications."

She brings it to bed.
I do the washing up.

Put out a milk bottle
and the cat.

The cat sneaks
back in again.

I no longer looking like
Michael Caine.

"Isti mirantvr stellam."
I whisper to myself.
"Isti mirantvr stellam"( "These marvel at the star.")

In the Anglo-Saxon Chronicle. Eilmer of Malmesbury may have seen Halley previously in 989, as he wrote of it in 1066:

"You've come, have you? ... You've come, you source of tears to many mothers, you evil. I hate you! It is long since I saw you; but as I see you now you are much more terrible, for I see you brandishing the downfall of my country. I hate you!"

"Hic Harold rex interfectus est!"( "Here King Harold has been killed." )

One can guess what had been killed in our protagonist's trousers...the King of his anatomy laid low with all this talk of history.


The Toffees or Everton got to the final by not conceding a single goal but alas went 2 nill down to the Owls or Sheffield Wednesday. But made an amazing comeback and won the FA Cup of 1966  by three goals to two.

"Stand up if you won the war!" was the chant of the English only a few weeks later won the World Cup by beating Germany 4-2.

— The End —