in the dark
compass spinning
wanton wind
howling, wailing
brittle arms
in concert waving
emerald waters
whipped and raging

sky crushed velvet
sequins sewn tight
to the shattered
span of night
a million times
each time as new
with stardust eyes
with gratitude

Question
Shame eyes overted sudden noise
Buzzing in the back of the brain
The hook is left hanging submerged in the water
Fogging the thoughts until they disappear
Words ran away at a thought of being spoken
Thoughts those complex layers of
Experience feelings impulses values
So much insight and potential
Running out the door
Atom by atom splitting hanging in the air above
Spoken sounds are escaping the tongue
Oh what a torture to be at a mercy of
Limitations
Unknowing and lost in the bubble with only self
And the gaping hole of loneliness
And everything unsaid

Through acceptance i find my way
To only that within the grasp
The truth begging to be said
When in no doubt
Or finding dignified peace in silence

Hello halo
Up there where I can't see
How absurd you become
In days like these
Or is it you naughty sense of humor?
Was I your mother
Would have put you to stand in the corner
For a few
Why give me a rational brain
To **** me
With emotions?
Would be better of as a fish
Or a bird
Not thinking not comparing myself
To the rest of my kind
My kind that was never truly
Mine
Why make me feel other people's feelings
Loosing myself beyond the point
Of no return
Thank you for my profession
Otherwise I'd be sharing the room with those I treat
How do you suggest I pull away?
From the mess of other worlds I feel inside
No one can understand but many believe...
And if that was not enough why this encounter
With shadow that will never leave
Strange fantasy that could not seize
As if a powerful storm that became my life
Something that sank down to the core
In an instant before I even realized
Yet storm would be easier to comprehend
Too much feeling and unexplainable
Knowing taking control
Over the remains of my poor rationality
That all I want lately
Is to switch it all off
Into oblivion

Sullen irony of the estranged
Ever homeless always
Somewhere on the home bound trail
With a Phoenix of hope
Killed by day and reborn
Under a symphony of moon light
It never ends until
It's done and only time
Keeper knows when the clock strikes
The rhythm of your finale
So shall I  step from the shadow
To be or hide to be seen?

Gentle breeze engulfing every bit of
Sadness that was left it blew away
With the salt air and flocks of seagulls
Under the warmth of my children's palms
Loving heat the best of all things I ever created
Taking the moments one at a time and
Forever wishing to be more present
Yet feeling a tinkling of distant thought
The grey area of fatal uncertainly
Ever pulling in some ironeously
Self-destructive direction no amount of
Education could possibly eradicate
A glimps of the deadly silhouette the one
My insanity wished to befriend
She is here inexplicably near or is she not?
Was she ever not? that is a better way to place the question
Strange and creepling I know she is wishing
As maybe I am in some deep down irrational cave where
Fear decides to embody the joy of motherhood
Maternal towards that which never wished me well
By definition untrustworthy never proving me wrong
Yet in this vast sensory symphony by the sea
The attraction of my singularity to the core of all things
Is only beyond my comprehension
Yet forever existing in accord with some universal order
And I wish I saw her eyes