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May 2021 · 122
Hopeful
RobbieG May 2021
Tomorrow I’ll be
better than today but now
I must just give in
RobbieG May 2021
A room on wheels
with my storage platform bed
and my solar powered devices

A party on wheels
with a roof rack that holds 4 camping chairs, table
and a trunk with a propane grille, charcoal grille and fire pit

A room on wheels
with my built in closet that keeps all my work clothes  wrinkle free and organized  and two drawers for my fold-ups

A party on wheels with my 6 remote controlled led lights , laptop with built in WiFi to stream movies and play games

This is my work car and many nights on long trips it has been my sleeping quarters and many nights it has provided a night full of camaraderie

My co workers and I sit around a fire in comfortable chairs as we cookout on my two grilles  from food we all chipped in to provide

At first glance people think I’m crazy but once they get to participate in the environment they can’t believe the fun

I average 28 miles per gallon , I can shower at any Planet Fitness, Flying J or Pilot truck stop as well as stay the night for free in their well lit parking lots

I have screens that go over the outside of the windows like a glove covering the open windows for airflow without the bugs being able to get in

I have a solar powered fan that mounts above my head as well as one that mounts up front to create steady airflow

Underneath the storage bed houses anything and everything a road trip could desire as well as necessities for survival

The glovebox a small hidden pantry for protein packed snacks and healthy alternatives

My workout items hang on the exterior of the closet wall behind my headrest: resistant bands , hand grips and my protein powder tumbler all with designated hooks

I love my small resort on wheels. As it has provided some lifelong memories and always gets a stray smile from others that know not of it’s powers

But the most important reason I love my Cruze is it has provided a really neat father son project and one that shapes a young mans mind and lets him realize anything you think truly can become possible

Regardless of what others think or say because everyone that told us we were crazy has enjoyed a spot around the fire and a well grilled meal

They say “ you know what this is pretty cool after-all, I just didn’t think it would be possible.

The best part is within 10 minutes and 4 fasteners the front seat can be put back in  to it’s original working position

However we designed it so a passenger can still be buckled up while it remains a car camper

Now if only school would get out soon so we can begin our planned adventures for this summer
May 2021 · 119
DONE!
RobbieG May 2021
Is it the $800 mortgage that prevents you from the $8 cofeee or is it the other way around

Is it the $400 car payment that prevents you from the $12 lunch or the other way around

Is it the $200 phone bill that prevents you from the $16 to go see a movie or the other way around

Priorities, Priorities. Priorities

Its the $8 coffee, the $12 lunch and the $16 movie that keeps me having to loan you money so you can keep your phone , car and house

Well I’m done being an ATM for everyone else because I need to put my Priorities first

TOUGH-LOVE

As I stream movies for free and only pay $50 a month for my phone plan

As I have a car that is paid off and still decide to pack my lunch to save money

As I brew coffeee every morning for pennies on the dollar to enjoy and I don’t even have a mortgage

But yet you keep borrowing from me,
GET LOST
RobbieG May 2021
Not comfortable
within your own skin or mind
you are not to blame

For this is his fault
I promise you can trust me
I will help you grow

Day by day we will
move slow and I’ll be patient
together we will

Conquer these feelings
of those insecurities
until they are gone

You’re worth it My Love
you deserve to be happy
we both deserve that

You know I love you
together just you and me
that is our future

A life that allows
you to be comfortable
however you are

Because I love you
so unconditionally
and I accept you

Only for yourself
whatever or whoever
that truly may be

Because love is blind
It’s what is beneath your chest
and those pretty eyes

That have me willing
to risk it all, you’re worth it
I will be patient
May 2021 · 48
Gift or a Curse
RobbieG May 2021
Words heard that meant so much

Words felt that meant the most to you

Words expressed to others in love

Words used with compassion to help

If only these were the only types of words

Words used as tools to help heal wounds

Unfortunately my relationship with words

Hasn’t always been a caring one

I know the importance of words powers

Words of weapons used against myself

Words of violence hurting my feelings

Words of others shaping my insecurities

Words of the jealous breaking me down

Words from birth to a graduated man

Creating a monster inside my head

Words learned and used in the same way

Causing my adult relationships pain

Words I cannot take back nor return

Words I cannot speak of but wish I could

Words describing who I want to become

Versus the words that currently reflect me

Words read to learn about desired change

Words wrote to help grow through poetry

Words are the answers to our problems

Words are our demise if used wrongly

Words are what we make them to be

So don’t blame words when we are to blame

So use them wisely with good intentions

That’s when words can benefit us the most

To provide support, to heal and help

To build others up when they are feeling down

To relate and conquer others loneliness

To share and prove this world has hope

Words our everlasting remedy afforded to all

Words a gift we all have been given

Words a true blessing we all can create

Words might be the difference you can make
May 2021 · 81
Blind Decisions
RobbieG May 2021
Victims to ourselves
captive to our minds
hostage to our hearts
Lost and found thoughts
weigh heavy in our hearts
Lost and found love
weigh heavy in our minds
If only we could see
what it is we need
But the fact remains
our thoughts and love
will always remain blind
to each-other
Unlike our feelings
those forever will show
even when it’s not in
our benefit because
our minds and hearts
know what they want
but it’s not always
In our benefit
So we remain
victims to ourselves
captive to our minds
and hostage to our hearts
May 2021 · 139
Dead
RobbieG May 2021
No longer bleeding
No longer breathing either
A lifeless victim
May 2021 · 58
Bored
RobbieG May 2021
Bored you are
alone and afraid
Those demons
in your closet
Call your name
when absent from
DISTRACTIONS
So you act out
to avoid the pain
But I don’t take it
PERSONAL
As I can read
between the lines
Its their fault
not yours
As they are
the ones
That made you
who you are
RobbieG May 2021
Yesterday’s newspaper becomes today’s toilet paper

But yesterday’s toilet paper is today’s newspaper
May 2021 · 68
Self-Remedy
RobbieG May 2021
WHAT DO YOU MEAN ?
Please just give me a name ,
tell me there’s a pill, or a specific treatment that can fix this but please ... Whatever you do, don’t tell me it’s all
IN MY HEAD !
FU*KED

THERE HAS TO BE SOMEONE ! That can fix this problem for me.

THERE HAS TO BE A PILL
I CAN TAKE!  That can help take my issues away.

THERE HAS TO BE SOME KIND OF TREATMENT! That can provide me a cure.

BUT... If you expect me to believe there’s nothing you can do to help me and this is all: SELF-INFLICTED , than I’m definitely ******* !
May 2021 · 110
Service Human
RobbieG May 2021
Therapy human
he’s a needy little guy
that Buster of mine
May 2021 · 391
TRUST
RobbieG May 2021
Please don’t ask for it
   I promise you can earn it
          It’ll just take time
May 2021 · 31
Sad Reality ( freestyle )
RobbieG May 2021
Mental health
your brains gravity
When it’s missing
your mind is gone
Outer space
in orbit rotating
Thoughts of self hate
afraid to be yourself
Always trying to be
someone everyone
wants you to become
So you fit in
where you can
get in
That’s no life
for someone
Where’s the self-love
a foundation of self-worth
you can build from
Lost in translation
your subconscious speaking
a dangerous language
Crowded contradiction
mixed with clouded values
Not aware of the disarray
because your whole life
you have been this way
Born a star shinning bright
with each day and night
they took the sparkle
little by little out of your eyes
and every year
you began to fade
until now and it seems the dream became a nightmare and your faded all the way away from anything that resembles back in the day when you felt okay but now you don’t and won’t ever, it seems no matter the whispers you hear of a different pattern waiting for you to jump ship to but out of fear you’ll drown , you remain stuck abroad a battling one knowing you can fight just fine all the hits and adjectives you’ve taken to the flesh and ears both relaying to the heart your worthless,  still hasn’t broken you yet so why chase a possible outcome that might lead to positive change or it could cost you your life but isn’t your life costing you yourself and then the doubt kicks in , the door is wide open and that scares the hell out of you being vulnerable so you quickly slam it closed and put the chain and bolt through the receiver as you twist and turn the deadbolt and lock on the doorknob , falling to the floor sitting Indian style against it with your head down this is where you feel the most comfortable but yet there’s a whole world out there but it doesn’t matter because regardless your heart and passion your mind can’t just fathom the fear of loss for hope to gain your a train wreck and it’s not your fault but **** it you must deal with it because the real culprits don’t give two ***** about the mental warfare they started and left you to handle but you aren’t willing to grasp it , your mind can’t wrap around what needs to be done you keep questioning every thought that might lead to somewhere more positive , the bad always outweighing the good so you justify staying the same and remaining a pawn in the victims chess game serving a life sentence of giving into a past that is behind you and forgetting about the future ahead of you out of fear of your own thoughts ....... lost.... hurt ... insecure..... bitter... mad....angry....unworthy...sad...decided....undecided...can’t make up your mind , hostage to comfort of bad patterns not realizing a whole other side to this dark spectrum , not understanding why , not realizing a change necessary to carry the burdens and discard them, but you keep giving up on yourself as a result of lack of confidence , why do these feelings always work against you , you ask yourself . Does anyone care and the answer is never as much as you do about yourself so why won’t you quit giving up and give in , why keep sitting head down in the comfort of your sorrow dreaming for tomorrow to come and it be different knowing you’ve remained the same versus standing tall , head up and taking today and making it your own so tomorrow will follow today’s lead and today’s grief tomorrow becomes yesterday’s pathetic sad story and tomorrow marks the beginning of the new chapter filled with battles and disasters but as a result of the pursuit to laughter and happiness , so get up off your *** and quit feeling sorry for yourself and make today’s problems tomorrow’s yesterday’s and tomorrow’s story a happier one than today’s
or NOT , it’s only your choice to make!
May 2021 · 73
A little less
RobbieG May 2021
I don’t miss the darkness
that held my subconscious and mental health captive however the writes about those battles and fights were fierce

I don’t miss the pain from my last heartbreak as it’s been almost a year  and I finally feel over it however the writes about those battles and fights were heartbreaking

I don’t miss the blood and tears from my childhood years as those battles and fights are far gone now thank god however those writes were the most raw and intense poems I could ever write and now it’s all behind me

So that leaves me with a little less fierce, a little less heartbreaking, a little less raw and intense writes but I guess there’s a certain happiness that comes with the more missing
May 2021 · 66
She Calls
RobbieG May 2021
She calls your name as her voice whispers amidst your subconscious making broken promises trying to convince your voice of reason to tell your self lies in order to give in to her attempts to reclaim your soul
for her purpose as she misses her sidekick

You always were the life of the party and now your gone and it’s driving her crazy knowing the ability and power you have to convince a whole room to join you in sin as you all live it up faithfully

You were her biggest supporter, she always could count on you but now you’re letting her down. How? she asks herself as she sees you sitting at home doing nothing but writing poetry and drinking non-alcoholic seltzer

Her biggest fear is what her boss will think when he realizes she allowed you to give up drinking and start thinking for yourself .........

Yeah that is her biggest fear isn’t it, well be scared because I’m through with you , I don’t need you anymore Temptation or your calls because they will always go UNANSWERED, but keep trying as it’s giving me really good practice at saying NO and teaching my brain and subconscious that I SOLELY CONTROL MY THOUGHTS and NOT ANYONE ELSE so just remember that !
May 2021 · 72
Broke
RobbieG May 2021
Freedom costs, can you spare
some change says the guy
holding the sign
———————
|      NEED       |
|     MONEY     |
———————
           |
You look at the stoplight and think please turn green but it remains red

You grab your wallet and take what little bit of cash you have and hand it to him

You reply back “ you are 100’/,
correct, it isn’t free is it ? as the green light appears
May 2021 · 77
Win/ Win ( compromise)
RobbieG May 2021
Dad: son let’s sit by the fire tonight and have some father son time

Son: dad let’s sit in front of the tv tonight and play video games and bond

Extension cord ran
from the garage
Folding table grabbed
from the storage shed
Camping chairs gathered
from the cars trunk
Television moved
from the spare bedroom
And together we
set it all up
in front of
THE FIRE-PIT
WIN WIN
May 2021 · 64
Blind Date
RobbieG May 2021
Sunshine is useless
against enormous white clouds
man, I hate dating
May 2021 · 272
Manure 💩
RobbieG May 2021
If your mind is full
with an abundance of ****
plant some good thought seeds
May 2021 · 193
Squash Litterbugs
RobbieG May 2021
Vibrations
magnetic force fields
Pyramids
gravitational pull
Mother Nature
runs her course
Ashes to ashes
dust to dust
Canyons, Mountains
waterfalls, valleys
Earth’s stones
laid to rest
An outer galaxy
with random threats
Comets, asteroids
and meteorites
DEBRIS
Complexity
in movement
Spin, rotate
and Directions
North, South, East and West
Compass directs
Our Fate
beyond known
Knowledge
The key to unlock
all these secrets
Amidst the bottom
of the oceans
SOMEWHERE
Maybe , maybe not
somewhat unlikely
the magic 8 ball
displays on the Circle Screen
Fast forward
current time
Added stresses
to age old problems
Pollution
overpopulation
islands surrounded by
PLASTIC BOTTLES
Overcrowded landfills
extinct animals
periodic oil spills
Where’s Mother Nature’s
MASK ?
When is tomorrow ?
and who’s living for then ?
In a world that’s all about
NOW NOW NOW
HOW did it come to this
when did happiness
come in the form of
POSSESSIONS
The comet already came
the asteroid already hit
the meteorites everywhere
When mankind landed
it may have been
friendly fire
But that was then
and not now
Every step we take more debris we leave falling behind
Doubt that ?
Then look back
COMPARE
Stare , but please quit pretending
you can’t See, or afford to
PAY ATTENTION
It’s the season for littering , let’s all do our part to keep this earth clean and hold people accountable .
RobbieG May 2021
Mommy and Daddy
apart like the Moon and Sun
each doing their part
RobbieG May 2021
Forecast calls for ?
Brainstorm
Topic choice
dark humor
Said the weatherman

With a chance of ?
thought cloud
wait for it
Punchline
heavy winds

On and off
light switch
brain showers
random thoughts
grab your umbrellas

If I had a dollar
for every time
the weatherman
was wrong
Well , I’d be rich
sometimes I think
he forgets, who is
in charge

It’s the big guy
upstairs holding the phone
as this is, his write
Poet God
well not really
but it sounded good

As the blue lights
from the television
keep the eyes lit
that are heavy
from a long day
COMMERCIAL
ADVERTISING
replies keep them up

Something is on your mind
you can’t quite place it
if only you could
but every other distraction
and you forget about it
but deep inside the pain
is still ticking
Marco ...... the call goes
unnoticed , if only it was
that easy but no Polo
to point it out

What’s wrong
your significant other asks
as you’re lost in the show
before answering
you think to yourself
why ask now
instead of during the
COMMERCIALS

Snap back from that thought cloud and answer
“nothing dear”
you sure ? “Uh huh”
meanwhile amidst your mind
a pinball machine
of stress from A through Z
isn’t it obvious if they ask
“ you sure ?” then they know
SOMETHINGS WRONG

Im just gonna go to bed !
you get up , they shake
their head AKWARD
yeah being single
isn’t so bad after all

Wake up in a sweat
info commercial advertising
cha cha chia pet
with clay dish
3 payments of
$9.95 , it was a dream
thank God
but then you hear
“what’s wrong dear”
you look to your side
and SCREAM ... NOOOO!
It’s your life After-all
May 2021 · 91
Reap What You Sow
RobbieG May 2021
Words to seeds
as
mind to ground

green mouth - green thumb

Spoken to planted
as
they both are injected

Behavior to sunlight
as
actions to rain

Both become nurtured

Now sit back
and
watch them grow

insecurities or strength
healthy or unhealthy

Only the gardeners
know
what they planted
May 2021 · 80
PuPpEt MaStEr
RobbieG May 2021
Puppet Master”
I consume you
own you
it’s all you know
I lift you up
raise you high
for all to see
my love for you
is so toxic
without me
you cannot breathe
I consume you
move you
left to right
tell you how to feel
place you on
a pedestal
just to tease you
release you
from the sky
I consume you
drag you
across the floor
disregard your feelings
leave you with scars
tell you I love you
only to break your heart
I consume you
your every action
at the mercy of my hands
I’m your puppet master
your body drives me mad
I consume you
Hide you
put you away
only I decide
when you come out to play
I own you
that will never change
I’m your puppet master
it’s me
that pulls these strings
I consume you
without me
you wouldn’t exist
your very existence
quenched between
the palms of my fists
thank God
I love you
regardless the
lifeless limbs
with no voice
you possess
for I’ll control you
you can trust me
I’ll always
have your back
I consume you
use you
like a host
my hands hosting
your motions
I breathe life through you
don’t you ever forget
I’m the master
your my puppet
May 2021 · 135
Love Me Like That
RobbieG May 2021
Love me like you want to be loved
but not now

Love me like you wanted to love
when you were young

Before your first love let you down
before your first heartbreak

Before you cried those sad tears
before you felt the pain

Love me like that
if you can

I promise I won't
let you down

I'm sorry he did
but I'm not him

In return I'll love you back
how you expected the first time

Before all the insecurities were born
before your trust was broke

Love so pure and unconditional
love so raw and unaltered

I think that's what
we both long for

I could be wrong
but I hope I'm not

I love you like that
will you love me back?
May 2021 · 58
Third EYE 👁
RobbieG May 2021
Beware it truly exists

Danger when it stares

Just stay hidden amongst the world

You don’t want to be spotted
or SINGLED OUT

Its watching us all BIG, small,
T
A
L
L

Any and all

You , me
him, her
and THEM

Power of three
triangle strongest shape
with three sides
3 stooges
3 little pigs
Big bad wolf
3 houses
or The most famous
“Third time is the charm “
let’s not forget
ABC to market the alphabet

123 to market the numbers

I know the powers of three , but do you

YOU
HIM
HER

Three words with 3 letters to cover all the sexes

Don’t take the 3 for granted

Don’t let the THIRD EYE
catch you OFF GUARD

1.Through him
2. with him
3. in him

1. G 2. O 3. D
GOD

Or
Lets

Not
FORGET

Mom, Dad, Dog, Cat

The list goes on

1. seconds 2. minutes 3. hours

1. days 2. months 3. years

Feet , inches , centimeters

Every Ruler READS

Spark , ignite, flame
123

Warm yourself up
here we go
its to easy
creating A poem
writing all verses
with 3 words
every single time

3.....2.......1........
AND BLAST OFF
here we go
space ship rocket
Off in sky
to another planet
to be victim
to the 3
and the power
it truly has
they too will
worship and follow
THE THIRD EYE
May 2021 · 156
WORLD PEACE PROTEST
RobbieG May 2021
🇦🇫LM🇦🇽LM🇦🇱LM🇩🇿LM🇦🇸LM🇦🇩LM🇦🇴LM 🇦🇮LM🇦🇶LM🇦🇬LM🇦🇷LM🇦🇲LM🇦🇼LM🇦🇨LM🇦🇺LM🇦🇹LM🇦🇿LM🇧🇸LM🇧🇭LM🇧🇩LM🇧🇧LM🇧🇾LM🇧🇪LM🇧­🇿LM🇧🇯LM🇧🇲LM🇧🇹LM🇧🇴LM🇧🇦LM🇧🇼LM🇧🇻LM🇧🇷LM🇮🇴LM🇻🇬LM🇧🇳LM🇧🇬LM🇧🇫LM🇧🇮LM🇰🇭LM🇨🇲­LM🇨🇦LM🇮🇨LM🇨🇻LM🇧🇶LM🇰🇾LM🇨🇫LM🇪🇦LM🇹🇩LM🇨🇱LM🇨🇳LM🇨🇽LM🇨🇵LM🇨🇨LM🇨🇴LM🇰🇲LM🇨🇬L­M🇨🇩LM🇨🇰LM🇨🇷LM🇨🇮LM🇭🇷LM🇨🇺LM🇨🇼LM🇨🇾LM🇨🇿LM🇩🇰LM🇩🇬LM🇩🇯LM🇩🇲LM🇩🇴LM🇪🇨LM🇪🇬LM­🇸🇻LM🇬🇶LM🇪🇷LM🇪🇪LM🇪🇹LM🇪🇺LM🇫🇰LM🇫🇴LM🇫🇯LM🇫🇮LM🇫🇷LM🇬🇫LM🇵🇫LM🇹🇫LM🇬🇦LM🇬🇲LM🇬­🇪LM🇩🇪LM🇬🇭LM🇬🇮LM🇬🇷LM🇬🇱LM🇬🇩LM🇬🇵LM🇬🇺LM🇬🇹LM🇬🇬LM🇬🇳LM🇬🇼LM🇬🇾LM🇭🇹LM🇭🇲LM🇭🇳­LM🇭🇰LM🇭🇺LM🇮🇸LM🇮🇳LM🇮🇩LM🇮🇷LM🇮🇶LM🇮🇪LM🇮🇲LM🇮🇱LM🇮🇹LM🇯🇲LM🇯🇵LM🇯🇪LM🇯🇴LM🇰🇿L­M🇰🇪LM🇰🇮LM🇽🇰LM🇰🇼LM🇰🇬LM🇱🇦LM🇱🇻LM🇱🇧LM🇱🇸LM🇱🇷LM🇱🇾LM🇱🇮LM🇱🇹LM🇱🇺LM🇲🇴LM🇲🇰LM­🇲🇬LM🇲🇼LM🇲🇾LM🇲🇻LM🇲🇱LM🇲🇹LM🇲🇭LM🇲🇶LM🇲🇷LM🇲🇺LM🇾🇹LM🇲🇽LM🇫🇲LM🇲🇩LM🇲🇨LM🇲🇳LM🇲­🇪LM🇲🇸LM🇲🇦LM🇲🇿LM🇲🇲LM🇳🇦LM🇳🇷LM🇳🇵LM🇳🇱LM🇳🇨LM🇳🇿LM🇳🇮LM🇳🇪LM🇳🇬LM🇳🇺LM🇳🇫LM🇲🇵­LM🇰🇵LM🇳🇴LM🇴🇲LM🇵🇰LM🇵🇼LM🇵🇸LM🇵🇦LM🇵🇬LM🇵🇾LM🇵🇪LM🇵🇭LM🇵🇳LM🇵🇱LM🇵🇹LM🇵🇷LM🇶🇦L­M🇷🇪LM🇷🇴LM🇷🇺LM🇷🇼LM🇼🇸LM🇸🇲LM🇸🇹LM🇸🇦LM🇸🇳LM🇷🇸LM🇸🇨LM🇸🇱LM🇸🇬LM🇸🇽LM🇸🇰LM🇸🇮LM­🇸🇧LM🇸🇴LM🇿🇦LM🇬🇸LM🇰🇷LM🇸🇸LM🇪🇸LM🇱🇰LM🇧🇱LM🇸🇭LM🇰🇳LM🇱🇨LM🇲🇫LM🇵🇲LM🇻🇨LM🇸🇩LM🇸­🇷LM🇸🇯LM🇸🇿LM🇸🇪LM🇨🇭LM🇸🇾LM🇹🇼LM🇹🇯LM🇹🇿LM🇹🇭LM🇹🇱LM🇹🇬LM🇹🇰LM🇹🇴LM🇹🇹LM🇹🇦LM🇹🇳­LM🇹🇷LM🇹🇲LM🇹🇨LM🇹🇻LM🇺🇬LM🇺🇦LM🇦🇪LM🇬🇧LM🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿LM🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿LM🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿LM🇺🇸LM­🇺🇾LM🇺🇲LM🇻🇮LM🇺🇿LM🇻🇺LM  🇻🇦LM🇻🇪LM🇻🇳LM🇼🇫LM🇪🇭LM🇾🇪LM🇿🇲LM🇿🇼LM
    
      ALL  LIVES  MATTER
      LEAVE  YOUR  FLAG
      IN  THE  COMMENTS
Great grandfather brought family over from 🇨🇿 when the country divided , so we now line in  🇺🇸.
May 2021 · 120
EXPIRED FEELINGS
RobbieG May 2021
Insecurities rest in peace
the day has arrived
Cremated
Flames are finally gone
from the fires you caused
Me
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust
one day I’ll rest with you
But
Until then I’ll continue to live
the way anyone deserves to
Comfortable
In my own skin and in my own head without your doubt so
Farewell
You had a good run but we both knew I would get better
May 2021 · 128
Deaf
RobbieG May 2021
Temptation calls you
hands firmly over your ears
I cannot hear you
May 2021 · 102
Old Brain / New tricks
RobbieG May 2021
Good luck with that dog
he’s old and that’s a new trick
good luck with that brain
May 2021 · 43
I Woke Up Today
RobbieG May 2021
I woke up today
well **** thats a start
How optimistic I am
for I know some have not
That’s just life though
one day  you’re  thriving
The next you’re barely
SURVIVING
Today marks day 8
since I took my last sip
May not seem like much
or a big difference to some
But to me I see and notice
how little things are different
Like my watch, it’s no longer
tight on my wrist, it fits loosely
My stomach isn’t bloated
My energy does seem a little
fatigued but that’s a normal
side effect
My brain and body are used
to operating the last 11 years
on alcohol as the nightly fuel
source, so it takes some time
to shake the curse and get things back on the right course
but the good news is I’m staying strong and most importantly my subconscious is my biggest support , the same voice in my head for 25 plus years telling me of fears from a blurred childhood, failed relationships and past is my strong point now, who would’ve thought
Well today not only marks day 8 but it also marks day 1 as I’m making the leap in faith today on May 23rd to go and seek about learning about Gods word
sure I’m not excited about the awkwardness of day 1 at a new church as everyone can be cheesy and over the top but maybe that’s the wrong thoughts to have , I don’t think it’s awkward to go into a random bar in a new town and drink and dance among strangers so why are our minds programmed so different when it comes to things that benefit versus things that can hurt or be a bad influence ..... well the devil works in mysterious ways is all I can think or maybe we just don’t love ourselves enough to have the confidence to know we deserve better , well no different than a hole in the wall , the right church will take you for who you are and accept all but If they don’t then just like that bar you have had  a bad experience at you can leave and try a different one
OPTIONS , for the record I’m not a very religious person at all but I will say what’s the worst thing that comes from gathering once a week with people that all believe in a higher power and have faith versus not ? That is the question I asked myself when weighing the good versus the bad and realized the good outweighed and won, so here I go with my best foot forward , standing tall and most importantly doing it sober
Happy Sunday everyone !
May 2021 · 65
Perception
RobbieG May 2021
Before her my cup was half empty

While together our cup became totally full , from her half full cup added to my half empty cup , creating one

After her, our cup became hers and I left with an empty cup and a **** ton of OPTIMISM
May 2021 · 55
Dropped Call
RobbieG May 2021
Purchased
used phone
upgrade
jail broke
good deal
but no
insurance
Fall call
phone cell
call dropped
concrete
cracked screen
works still
microscopic cuts
from screen
touch fingertips
hurts to
text message
voice text
speak to
speak through
phone mic
to prevent
touching screen
if only
You purchased
phone insurance
scam
maybe not
after all
especially
after fall
cell rings
answer carefully
please
to close
to ear
and it
hurts
hair gets
caught
in cracks
or it
cuts ear
from head
movement
from cell
phone
to touch
screen
to
fail phone
touch scream
all because
you literally
and physically
dropped your
call
on concrete
sidewalk
moral of
story
buy insurance
and save
money
fingertips
ear
hair
and prevent
from looking
crazy
speaking aloud
into a
cracked screen
or from
saying ouch
from the
pain
May 2021 · 51
Liquid Hell 🔥
RobbieG May 2021
Imagine a waterfall of HELL
———A : ACKNOWLEDGE
🔥🔥🔥 L : life-threatening
     🔥🔥 C : codependent
          🔥 O : overbearing
            🔥H : HELP ME
              🔥 O : obtainable
               🔥  L : lost cause
🌊🌊🌊 🔥🔥🔥🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🔥🔥🌊🌊🌊🌊
CAUTION !! DEEP-END !!!!!!!!!
🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🔥🔥🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🔥🔥🌊🌊🌊
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥ALCOHOL is an addiction that is hard to shake but the first step you must take is to 🔥🔥
ACKNOWLEDGE 🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
It can become life-threatening
due to your body and brain 🔥becoming so codependent 🔥
from continued use over time 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Quitting cold turkey can actually be dangerous due to how 🔥🔥overbearing the side effects can be HELP ME 🔥🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Although obtainable to 🔥overcome this addiction you 🔥must have a strong game-plan and support system because all it takes is one mistake , one 🔥relapse and you’re a lost cause
DEEP-END 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥       🔥🔥🔥🔥

🔥     🔥   🔥🔥🔥      🔥     🔥
🔥     🔥   🔥                🔥     🔥
🔥🔥🔥    🔥🔥🔥     🔥     🔥
🔥    🔥    🔥                🔥     🔥
🔥    🔥    🔥🔥🔥      🔥     🔥
May 2021 · 118
Bachelor Party
RobbieG May 2021
Piercing hazel eyes
whispering **** secrets
across the table
May 2021 · 71
Drinking Buddies
RobbieG May 2021
When one quits drinking it can be quite hard

Not just from the temptation of the alcohol withdrawals

But from the drinking buddies that you feel the need to avoid

Just like you before, they don’t see you as having a problem

Not that they don’t want to be able to support you

But they don’t want to think that they have a problem too

I will say that’s where I have been pretty lucky

During this battle amidst the troubles I’ve only lost a few

But the majority of my drinking buddies have remained in my
CORNER

I’ll start with my buddy Subconscious for example

He’s been staying strong and keeping his voice to himself

Only speaking up when it gets really tough saying things like

“Don’t give up Rob! You have come so far during this journey !”

Or how about our other good buddy Imagination

Imagination has been helping to be a positive DISTRACTION

Always weighing in with his many thoughts to ease the pain

Giving me support and advice like why take a drink when you can create a write

One of my other drinking buddies that has been a huge help is Memory

He’s not really close friends with Subconscious or Imagination but rather acquaintances

He still has been a big part in my transformation

As Memory always reminds me of the reasons from my personal past that help keep me from desiring another
RELAPSE

He promised me no more drinking and driving down his lane , like we used too

If only our other drinking buddies could be as supportive as these three have been

We all 4 together think sometimes how bad it ***** that we find it hard in our heart to hangout with the other few like :  Kyle, Ralph , Chris and Brandon

But as I get stronger with the support from my other strong friends then maybe one day we can all meet again .....
WITHOUT  TEMPTATION
May 2021 · 119
Work Hard
RobbieG May 2021
Physical work
physically draining
Social work
socially draining
Emotional work
emotionally draining
Mental work
all of thee above
MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS
RobbieG May 2021
Unlike words
we can create
our own antonyms
SEPARATE YOURSELF  

Unlike words
we can create
our own synonyms
RELATE YOURSELF

Unlike words
we can create
our own definition
DEFINE YOURSELF
May 2021 · 419
Contracted Love
RobbieG May 2021
Most love wrote in ink
   Our love wrote in graphite
                             THANK GOD

     True love wrote in blood  PERMANENT or
supposed to be

   Ink eventually will fade
Graphite easily can be erased
   Blood heartbreak vulnerable

After the last contract in blood, moving forward I’ll stick to GRAPHITE ! I’m just not comfortable with being vulnerable again.
May 2021 · 57
bItTeR tRuTh
RobbieG May 2021
My life’s demise
was in the disguise
of a love potion
but really a notion
in ALCOHOL
to allow me to
**** things up

My life’s entirety
relies solely on
my ability to face
my problems with
my SOBRIETY
no longer a victim
to numbing the pain
May 2021 · 51
Shake It Off
RobbieG May 2021
Etch A Sketch Love
When heartbreak calls
I’ll shake it off
May 2021 · 90
B A C 0.0
RobbieG May 2021
It’s
contagious  
outrageous
an illness
with
no fulfillment
if you will
And
all it takes you
to make you
into a victim
Is just one drop
pressed to your lips
mixed with
the scent
of it
will make you
go weak
relapse
ALCOHOL
But not anymore
as that door
has been closed
regardless the calls
from the deep-end
I refuse to give-in
when I can
REMAIN in
Shallow Waters
never willing to
take you
B A C
0.0 ‘/. Chances
pun intended
B A C = Blood Alcohol Content
RobbieG May 2021
................NORTH
                      

                      C
                      R
WEST      CROSS           EAST
                      S
                      S
                    
                 SOUTH
May 2021 · 39
Trinity / Power of 3
RobbieG May 2021
Our eyes mirrors     THROUGH
we look to the light                  I
to reflect God’s eyes              M
shinning bright
CONNECTED
As our eyes reflect    
the strength of                 WITH
the Holy Ghost                       I
directly to our soul               M
CLEANSED
The blood of Christ        
his only son runs                 H
through our veins                IN
pumping life                        M
SACRIFICE
The last part needed
only you can decide
for yourself
FAITH
May 2021 · 67
Faith Based
RobbieG May 2021
................... MORTAL  
Limited time            I
Limited growth        FAITHLESS
Limited opportunity E


                  IMMORTAL
Unlimited time            I
Unlimited growth        FAITH
Unlimited opportunity E

PICK YOUR OPTION ?
May 2021 · 96
An Eternal Soul
RobbieG May 2021
Life suffers
it’s upon us all

Death lingers
it’s upon us all

Born to both
raised until we fall

Down, down, down
hopefully not to far

But rather raised again
from the ground

Regardless the soul
it must live on

Upon us all
May 2021 · 107
BrEaK fReE
RobbieG May 2021
Ball and chain
BRAIN
CAPTIVE
thoughts and actions
PRE-DETERMINED
PROGRAMMED
insecurities and trauma
INGREDIENTS
WITHIN  
constant struggles
INTERNALLY
HARVESTED
unacquainted values
ROLE-MODELS
NONEXISTENT
desired changes
ACCEPTANCE
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
investigating history
PERSONAL
PAST
dissecting situations
REGARDLESS
DARKNESS
managing behaviors
BREAKING
PATTERNS
using exercises
SELF-TAUGHT
EDUCATION
moving forward
WITH
GOALS
staying focused
EVERYDAY
AHEAD
May 2021 · 66
Bedtime Battles
RobbieG May 2021
DREAMS            DREAMS
  E       T              DEATH
   A     O               STORMS
   T     R                HOME
   H O M E
           S

LIGHTNING ⚡️ BOLTS

NIGHTMARES  NIGHT-MARES
O                  A    SAFETYNETS
 N                F        NONSENSE
  S              E               ESCAPE
   E             T                    LOST
    N           Y
     S          N
     ESCAPE
                 T
            LOST

STORM ⛈ CLOUDS

B                             BRAINS
RAIN                            RAIN
A     I                          NIGHT
I     G                            STOP
N  H 
STOP
 
RANDOM 🧠 THOUGHTS 


 DREAMS TURN TO 
NIGHTMARES AMIDST 
OUR BRAINS 

DEATH WITHOUT 
SAFETYNETS POUR 
DOWN RAIN 

STORMS OF
NONSENSE 
AT NIGHT 

HOME WE 
ESCAPE 
PLEASE STOP 

LOST !
May 2021 · 91
evoL sdrawkcaB
RobbieG May 2021
efil evol ym sdrawkcaB
rehtie ti pleh t’ndid ehS
sniamer evol sdrawkcaB
May 2021 · 61
NMOp ƎpISԀ∩
RobbieG May 2021
☁️ ☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️
uʍop ǝpᴉsdn pooʇs I

spnolɔ ʍǝu ǝɥʇ ǝɯɐɔǝq suɐǝɔo

ʎʞs ǝɥʇ ʎʇᴉʌɐɹפ
🌊 🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊
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