I am amazed more
and more
how much the mind can be stuck
in slavery
to thoughts.

I am less afraid of people
who commit suicide.
Suffering is so intense.
It makes me think of how
low our minds can take us
down to where
we feel we
might drown.  

No one, not one person
is to blame for
suicide.
There should be no anger,
no shame.
Be real in life.
Do not shelter shame
as if it is a friend,
a payback,
or a way of life.

Shame is as deep as
******
is the devil.
Deep in an inkwell
Black tar stuck in
the pits searching
for free skies
for air
the soul is not for sell.

And it can come to this.....

Dead Enders

Places we have been to
Places we compare to
Travel light-years
In circles around us
Overtime
Around and around we go
Spiraling through the
self-disparaging
Thoughts we hack ourselves into.

Until,  Sense-less
Dead enders.
So, unthread,
Un  thread,
Un      thread.
Unwind
Before your prospects
Leave this space.

Around and around
we go
Transcenders
Looking out, looking up
and
Down
Sinking
Please me here
Take from there
Give to him always
Without a dare
Sunk and done
Dead end right here.

They say
Girls in glass houses
Shouldn't throw stones.
So how about they leave their house
And throw a boulder?
That's what I did

Don't let people mock you through glass...

I want to do something
But I can't seem to do anything
I just sit on the couch
Cat on my lap
Blanket over me
And read

Everything I write
Right now
I feel isn't complete

I want to get up
And walk with my music outside
But I'm tired
Why is this so hard for me?

Like the rose pricked from it's own thorns,
I have lead the rein to my destruction,
I cohabitate with loss,
That stems from my very own blood,
Thus my blood is a curse,
It heals,
And when I cut it,
is pours,
It lets me live and drown while ashore,
I am drowned in my blood
Yet my thirst isn't quenched

There is no wound that time doesn't heal,
Why then, is it getting harder to breathe?
Like a rope tightened around the neck slow.

Smiles, laughs, and memories we shared,
doesn't seem to dim the pain and remorse.

I had a child in me, I realised,
when I fought with you like one,
with my eyes shining, a wide smile,
and a laughter breaking out...

Didn't think twice before I blurted,
couldn't care less of what lay ahead,
out came the bottled up excitement,
with just your presence near me...

Felt what happiness in real is,
shared whatever was in the mind,
talked for hours straight with a smile,
what more could I ask for...

If this isn't love, tell me what is..