Aylin

Aylin Apr 2019

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I don’t know who I am.

I don’t feel like myself.

Where did she go?

The old me?

Why was she hurt so much when she just tried to love?

When did these walls go up?

When did she go so numb?

When did she DIE?????

Aylin Feb 2019

Valentine’s

I changed into a little set of lingerie when I got home, a blush pink mini dress, and I shook a little extra while doing the dishes. Our very first Valentine’s living together. We didn’t go out on a fancy dinner but we stayed home and cooked. I have daydreamed about every holiday to live with you, but this one is more special than I ever thought.
You didn’t give me any flowers, but you bought me my favorite snacks and you made us some yummy salsa while I prepared the food. We were high on love, and a little something extra. It was fun, it felt like home. These are the moments that are better than my daydreams.
I never get tired of falling in love with you. My Valentine.

I’m breathing in the moments that I’ve always dreamed of.

Aylin Jul 2018

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My mind thinks
              “He doesn’t want you here”
I say
              “I’m gonna leave”

“Okay”

Mind
                “You SEE I was RIGHT”

Why do I do that? Why can my mind not let me be okay, let me be happy? Why mind do you always try to make me sad? What did I ever do to you? To make you attack me every day? WHY DO I DO THIS!

Aylin Jul 2018

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It hurts to love someone who loves differently.
Where as I would cross an entire ocean to see my world in your eyes.
You wouldn’t drive two blocks to see me.
Where as I would wipe the tears from your eyes and be by your side.
You would let me cry alone.
Where as I would sacrifice my last ounce of happiness for you.
You would say “well I didn’t ask you to do that”
I know I’m not the easiest to love.
But I would take a bullet for you.

Why can’t you love me the way I love you

Aylin Jul 2018

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If I could paint the way I love you it would be a beautiful sunset.
Overcasting a sunflower field.
The beautiful blended light of the sun joining the darkness.
The canvas would be filled with so many shades and colors.
If I could paint the way I love you...

Jul 2018

Layla Emory Holt

The Waiting Game

We’ve been here before
The anticipation
The games
The conversations lasting into early morning
The knowing look in each others’ eyes

The only person who bring me so much joy and so much pain by just telling me the truth

I’ll wait
Or maybe you will
But either way
This is meant to be
Eventually we’ll see

The waiting game will be over
I promise

We’ll get our happily ever after

#love #waiting #relationships