Excuse me sir
The words were uttered
Surprised I turned
To see another

"If I may please have a second of your time"
"Sure" I said "That will be fine"

I'm sorry I'm at a loss for words you see
I've been out here since 8am
Everyone I've asked has passed me by
Looked me over as if I'm not a man

The time then was 1:30 in the afternoon
Dumbstruck I did the math in my head
Five and a half hours in the same spot
People treating you like you was dead
That's ****** up
Is all I could say
Open my ears
And listen away

I know you are late for a movie
And busy with your time you must be
I know you work hard for your money
That in this life nothing is free
I know people may be suspicious
Thinking with money I will burn and waste
I promise you that I am only hungry
Food the only thing I will take
For this please sir I ask you
If you may take the time
Could you please get me some pizza
I won't ask you for a dime

Please sir I assured him
If food is what you need
Take this and buy some
We all need to eat

Looking down he received the gift
Smiling back holding out a hand
Mine stretched out we did shake
The recognition of a man

"Enjoy the food" I did say
"And you the film for me"
Turning around he walked off
After hours on the street

In my mind this man did stay
His eyes burned into my brain
Worth of life measured in wealth
Class divides remain

Unconditional love
Given without pause or thought
Feel it in your veins
It's what brings us to our knees
Love for a stranger
The refusal to fight
A brother or sister
In this or another life

Painted green
No eggs and ham
Number "33"
One 12 oz can
Once from glass tanks
They do flock
Old Latrobe
The Rolling Rock

Waves rock
Back and forth
Time takes me
Back to sleep
Moonlight pools
Travelers steps
Curled up
I'm falling back

Concrete the paper
My feet the beat
My brain the pen
Sun the inspiration

When the economy tanks
Unregulated globalized free market capitalism run amuck
People are told to be thankful to have a job
Even if you are miserable with that job
And with service sector jobs making up 80% of employment
Misery is widespread
Underpaid, undervalued, underappreciated
We are human beings for ***** sake
We are starved for more than selling shoes
If being thankful for misery is the best option
It's time to re-evaluate

The wind swept dreams
Washed ashore on the beach
The sexiest thing you've ever seen
Cleopatras running in the street
Collect these desires collect them please
Keep them safe under lock and key
If ever I'm lost and my heart set to freeze
Open the box and give them back to the sea

Where did my baby go
She left me here waiting so patiently
The person who came back
Flaunts the same body
But those eyes are haunting me
Vacant of the love once there
Changed like seasons
You stumble around like a bad dream
If I feed you
It does not satiate your resentment
If I touch you
I am but hands through a screen

I bought a fish
And watched it swim for days
Put in a little bowl
Swimming its life away
I wondered what it was like
To be so incomplete
Alone in a bowl
No world at your feet
Consumed I became
In this solitary way of life
One hand to feed you
The other to give you light
It wasn’t before long
I started to grow gills
Locked up my door
And said goodbye to the world

Allergies exist on a scale
From mild to severe
I once had a friend
Who did not understand why I had allergies
Why I always sneezed
And had to blow my nose
Why I always opened a window
And looked like ****
The allergies became a nuisance to people
Annoying
In the way
Obstructive
Then one day
That friend developed allergies
He came over sneezing
Is this what it’s like?!
I feel so bad for you
I never knew how it felt
My body is attacking me
It’s horrible
You don’t have to experience things
To show kindness
Simple acts of sympathy and empathy
Carry other miles

Remember as kids
Hanging out in the yard
We never did
Those things promised from the start
Bitter ends
Keep us blinded in the dark
Silver pens
To trace the outlines of our loss

Child loves people
Child especially loves animals
Kid has many pets
Kid has many friends
Teenager loves biology
Teenager wants to become a doctor
College student majors in biology
College student wants to heal people
Doctorate student studies hard
Doctorate student wants to change lives
Doctor turns away those with wrong insurance
Doctor watches people die
Doctor makes private companies rich
Doctor feels sad and stupid

As this instant
Melts to time
I am wondering where I am
Before
After
I am taken above the clouds
Then dropped back to the mud
I thought I could hold you forever in this memory
But you are fading with me

The most abused of them all
That bitter taste
The bite of fire
Liquor and beer
The murkey and the clear
One of the coolest
Joe cool
Blow like city breeze
As romanticized as diamonds
Just as ****** - cigs
The Doctors choice (orders?)
Gets you revved up
Shot to the moon and back
With complete concentration
Amphetamine aka Adderall

If I was a child
Barely grown up
Would you resent me for my mistakes
Or learn how to love

When I was a teenager
Failing in school
Did you think I was stupid
Or just unamused

After graduating college
Now a bit older
Are you ashamed I'm unemployed
Or of the world I'm to shoulder

If I was 45
Leading your same life
Would you scold me for my faults
Or praise me that I tried

When I'm a bit older
And my hair turns grey
Will memories of you
Be the best or worst days

Used in medicines
The world over
Sent from the stars
To grow in abundance
Spared of addiction
Absence of toxicity
Breath of life
Thread of reflection
Given to the soil
Tendered to the soul
Flower of clarity
He did bestow

Invited to pick gold
Like flowers
Under burial mountains
Enlisted to pave the way
Of a rich white land
Track by track railroad Titans
Scorned off the land
Shot cut and excluded
Rebel against the worker
Yet he remains
Builds a family over generations
And prospers
Places like San Francisco
Home to sounds of Canton
Chinatowns blossom
During times of political strife
The Chinese laid down civil rights
Later to again be realized in the 60s
The Chinese fought for civil liberties
Against exclusions acts and hatred
To find a place in this new home
WWII more families allowed
Thus things began to further blossom
Painting the town you see now
Chinese Americans
Proud of history contribution and culture
Bringing art food and craft never seen
Adorn the streets for Chinese New Year
Kids excited to eat
Time to receive red envelopes
Knowing history small and large matters
Those born in America from Chinese descendants
Home is where the heart is

Love
Is
Blind

only because

Love
Is
Blinding

I must have leaded shoes
Gravity is turned up around me
I sink into the ground
When it's time to get out
I'm nowhere to be found

Going round for round
With the demons below
The heavy weight champ

On fire when I rise

Night folding into day
I barely feel awake
Turning one page
Revealing another

That plane in the sky
Holding all my dreams
Watch it taking off
Into the furthest reaches

The sand on that beach
Hiding amongst myself
Unseen painting the water
Feel me slip through your hands

Like your hair falling down
All around my face
Your breath as hot
Feeling the fire burning blue

Shade me absolute green
Pull down the blinds around me
The fire turns me to smoke
Consume the room till we breath

Ripped away my fanatic decency
I dream of that anxious calm
Floating in and out of dreams
One sweeter than the next till the first is hell

A sense of fairness felt under trees
Shades of knowledge pumping like poison
What is of the earth is always given back
Through time we stumble blind

Most of this air I cannot breath
With the fish I tried to swim but could not see

Like war
Marching on
In and endless trudge
Towards an abstract end goal
Persevering through
Battling the insults and abuses
Stuck in the trenches
Fighting until you make it
To the end
And you retire from the life of war
Left with a fractured mind
Only able to take commands
Swift with knee-**** reactions
Contemplating a life sacrificed for another
Was it worth it?

Scanning the language
To make sense
Of two different worlds
Propose
The interpretation
For one party
It translates
For the other
It is lost

The spirit it catches you
The interpreter desperately relays the message
But it does not translate
It has caught you
You are falling down
Yet no one seems to understand the message
Throwing pebbles
At a brick wall
Even when translated
To a familiar language
Those hardened in their ways
Fail to comprehend the meaning

The steps outside
That trace a fear
An aching in the heart
When your own consciounce
Betrays you
Leaves you to be consumed
By untempered thoughts

It was the most beautiful thing
He had never seen
Four corners
Sharp in appearance
Staring back
He blinked
And it blinked
He let out a long breath
Fogging the vision
Wiping it away
He smiled
The most beautiful thing
He'd never seen
His reflection

The fear of the unknown
Let it sow
Let it grow
Hiding like the monster
You have consumed
Cast in doom
The light it swirls
All in your head
Wrapped in bed
We hold on for dear life
Cast in strife

the music
to drown out the silence
the serum
to shield the arrows
the smoke
to make the pieces whole

Boom boom
Ratatat
Organized thugs
Navy blue hats

Singing songs
About murdering kids
LAPD
Pleading the 5th

Boom boom
Ratatat
Organized thugs
Carrying bats

Jumped the turnstile
That fare ain't free
That's 10 from behind
In the SFC

Boom boom
Ratatat
Organized thugs
Pointing gats

New Years passed
Face down on the ground
Fruitvale Station
A pop the final sound

Amused with his own actions
Holding on to each of his own words
He foolishly conducts the circus
With ignorant precision
As the crowd looks on
And laughs

She resented him
Because when he was after her
He already had a girlfriend
Ignored his calls
Stopped coming around
Years later
Passed him by
Resentment digging deep

She ran from him
Because she heard he was seeing another girl
Judgement calls made
Wanting to be the only one
Running back to the boy she was seeing
Years later
She puts on a smile
And walks by

She ignored him
Because he had too much time on his hands
To sit and think about her
No one else allowed in
She was hidden like a secret
Talk of the present and future
As intoxicated as the state of love always made
He never saw her again

Miles off the ground
Thoughts lingering
Anxiety has rid my body of peace
The stretch of time gone
Has worn my heart thin
But still it beats
Waiting to go home

Memories cherished
Brought back to life
A return to a normalcy
The day spins away
Wheels on a familiar track
The lurking shadow of reality
Forgotten

Everything as it should be
Everything familiar
Everyone family
Wrapped up
In this perfect moment
Cherished
Not to be forgotten
Just as it used to be

Calm and collected
The shattered pieces
Picked back up
Once again forming
Perfect crystal
The time to return home
Bringing a confidence back
Once forgotten

Things start to fall apart
Eyes wet
With pressure building
The compulsion for perfection
In this anticipated moment
It almost seems surreal
In its reality
But as reality sets in
The dream starts to fade
Even before its begun

All my life
I've seen girls and woman
Told to hate their own faces
Refusing to go outside
Without a face painted to perfection
Eighth grade -
Girl with blonde hair
Doesn't believe me when I say she's beautiful
When she lets me in
Her house
Wrapped in a blanket
Canvas blank
She nervously lets me stay
Two years after college -
Girl with brown hair
Doesn't believe me when I say she's beautiful
When she asks me how she looks best
And I say "without makeup"
She stares and says
No when do I look most beautiful
She nervously laughs

All my life
I've seen boys and men
Told to hate their own faces
Nose down ninety-five percent of the day
Eyes can't meet others
Freshman year of highschool -
Young boys face spotted with change
Ashamed without confidence
Feeling too small
Too insignificant
Lacking perfection
Ten years later -
A man with short brown hair
Eyes feeling too sunk in
Face not sharp enough
Cheeks hollow
Body twisted made to feel ugly
Almost letting go

time
is not something that just
passes us by
something that just
schedules our days
disappearing faster
than we can plan for

time
is all around us
embracing us
allowing for hours to turn to minutes
to turn to seconds
to an instant
frozen forever
in our memories

if there was not enough time
in this world
then we would not be here
the time is here
it is ours
we must take it
get lost in it
it will always be there
before and after
time is not "of the essence"
time is the essence

Who captains the ship
Off in the distance
Do they ever hesitate
Or fear what is beneath them
Does the fog and rain scare them
Are they fearless
Brave in the face of a vast ocean
Do they feel relief when they see land
Do they miss their family
Or is the sea their home

Desperate
For something to push back
My hands are on the concrete
Trying to feel the weight of the world
Pushing back

I can't even imagine
How it felt
What it felt like to be here
It must have been
Something like this
Above a bookstore
In a bar
Your mind can feel at ease

Plainclothes
Strolling
Through the neighborhood
Looking kinda like
You and me
The only difference is
The license to ****
Playing
Like a bond movie
With human lives
This ain't
M16
This is
USA
Where a police badge
Can take your life away

What happened

Friends fallen off
Relationships uncommitted
Family moved away

I guess it's so

In fall leaves come off
In winter things turn to ice
In summer hibernation ends

The things we don't remember
Are the things we care to forget
But who makes that choice
And why
The things we spin our wheels on
And others that don't have a chance
Who is the dj
Playing these songs on repeat?

Let us run
Like cars in the street
Let us fly
Like planes in the sky
Let us go
From the reigns of complacency
Let us forget
Who we are

So that we may one day find ourselves again

You can want something
So badly
From someone else
But you cannot change
Who someone else is
This is the beauty of people
That everyone is different
It just hurts
When those close to you
Act like that difference
Is what tears you apart
Not what brings you closer

Two men
Once boys
Now pass each other
Silently on the street
Eyes linger
Sparking distant memories
The body changes
The eyes don't
Eyes then torn apart
Thrown back into their destined paths
Two friends
Once so close together
Thrown in separate directions
Carrying down their own paths
Where did the past go?
It seems to still be so fresh in our memory

More liquor stores built
Than community centers
Letting that hole
That so many have
Fill
Till they drown