i had a dream
that you were here
holding me safe
in this dream
i wanted to talk to you
so i was simply going to open
my eyes, and talk to you
i woke                                                             ­                         
i opened my eyes                                                             ­      
and instead of you holding me                                            
the reality of your absence                                                     
weig­hed down                                                             ­           
because i was awake                                                            ­  
and you slept                                                            ­              
six feet down                                                             ­             
never to wake again                                                            ­  
this is why i don't sleep
because i'll wake up alone
the nightmares of your death
used to keep me awake
now the dreams of your life
makes me not want to sleep
because i want to sleep forever
six feet down
held safe in your arms
never to wake again

i've no effort                                            
i just want to sleep                                                
but the world    
or everything    
and everything
disagrees,                                
protests                              
and it seems
only tears                                                    
or just crying                                                          
tires me out                                                  
exhausts me                                              
just enough                                                          
for me to fall
into a subconscious
sleep or
maybe sleep
- might be
sleep -
but it's just                              
not     e n o u g h                                
to sustain me                        
and it has
resulted in
self formed                                                            
sadness                                                                      
that unfortunately                                                
results in blood                                                
all    t o o    much                                                                
i'm too sad
i cry myself
to half — maybe
— sleep