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Sep 2014 · 1.1k
--- Sep 2014
I am busy
Without any rest
I am happy
Happier than I have been in a long time
I'm finding where I belong and where I am called
Every day I find more truth, more life
But you, old friend, seem lost
You don't seem to want to talk
And I've rarely seen you in the last six months
I don't know what's wrong
But people still constantly ask me
"Where is he?"
Looking at this site again makes me angry, and I don't like it.  Maybe you'll see this, I need to get back to work.
Jun 2014 · 524
That's It
--- Jun 2014
I didn't want to do it today
Didn't want to ruin today
But I couldn't lie to you
I'm sorry
But this is what is right
To me, at least
I know you are sad
That you don't want to hear from me
But I do care
So I kept my promise
I expect you to keep yours
I don't know if I'll post again.
Jun 2014 · 524
Going Home
--- Jun 2014
It was just getting good
I was enjoying myself
My escape
But now I'm back to reality

I don't want to be home
Jun 2014 · 496
--- Jun 2014
I've thought
I understand
I hope
I'm right

It's not to be taken lightly
Jun 2014 · 573
--- Jun 2014
It's easy to take the easy way
Easy to pretend that what is, isn't
Living without a care because you don't believe in caring
Dying without a care because your life didn't matter
You made it to the roof, but you kicked away the ladder
It carried you up, but you say it isn't there
How does that work?  Don't ask me
Because I'm wrong, right?  Listen
You know it's right but you choose left
Walking away because it's easy, that road leads to pain
To death and burns, cuts
Rainbows fade, unicorns aren't real, but it sure is fun to pretend
It's fun to write nasty things, fun to offend and upend
Fun to push and pull, throw rocks, fire shots
Chainsaws don't give a peaceful sound
Guns hurt your ears, harsh sounds
It's merely a sound, but harsh sounds can break your ears
Harsh thoughts can break your mind
Thoughts of death can bring it, hasten it
No need to be chasing it.
Not sure where I was going with this.
Jun 2014 · 598
Don't hide, just seek
--- Jun 2014
Hiding never helped
Hiding only hurts
Because you forget you're hiding
You just think nobody cares
Instead, stand up
Throw down
You own this place
You own this earth
You deserve just as much as others
Don't hide, because you won't be sought
Seek, for you may just find what you want
Jun 2014 · 408
--- Jun 2014
Jun 2014 · 374
Waking up
--- Jun 2014
I awake
And I reach for
But I feel only pillows
May 2014 · 649
On the Horizon
--- May 2014
The rain is here
You want to drown
But there is light
On the horizon

Sticky wet heat
Clothes are so gross
But there is cooling
On the horizon

Doubting my existence
And fathoming things bigger than us
But there is peace
On the horizon

Stress and tests
Useless work
But there is Summer
On the horizon
Trying to feel hopeful
May 2014 · 447
--- May 2014
I love deep talks
About science, philosophy
But the aftermath is bad
I feel small
But with my faith
I am also small
But I am part
Of something larger
And good.
I'm so confused
But it'll be okay
Because even if philosophy and science make me
Insignificant and subjective
My reality is defined by contentment
And love
I still love science and philosophy, but I think I need to separate it a little.  I know what makes me feel right, that is enough
May 2014 · 1.8k
--- May 2014
What does a nightlight do?
What is it?
Not the children's kind
The person
A light in the night
The warm lamp in the dark room
The one who hugs you when all seems lost
The one who, when lost, cannot seem to find themselves
So the darkness needs to unite
We need to unite
To rekindle the nightlight's bright
May 2014 · 334
That Beauty
--- May 2014
She is so amazing
So beautiful
So smart
So interesting
But she doesn't think she is.
Accept a compliment for once, sweets...
May 2014 · 417
Princess (2)
--- May 2014
Well, you see, throughout the princess's life, she was attacked by little goblins.  She could usually fight them off, but it took her days sometimes.  Well, when she took the warrior in, she went into the kitchen to try and find something that would help him.  Of course, the door was left open.  A huge goblin, one of the biggest ever, seemed to wander in.  She heard it and froze in place.  The stomps were getting closer.  By now, though, the warrior who couldn't see the goblin was regaining some balance.  He got up and swing his sword around a couple times.  After one swing, he had accidentally beheaded the beast.  There was blood all over his sword and he didn't know what happened.  The princess rushed in when the stomps stopped and saw the monster lying dead.  The warrior was inspecting it as it became visible, nobody could see the goblins before.  She ran and hugged him for his valiant act, but it was an accident.  He was just happy to have been in the right place at the right time.  As she hugged him, her weakness started to show through again.  She was so happy to be protected, she hadn't been before.  She didn't want him to keep wandering.
May 2014 · 368
Princess (1)
--- May 2014
Once upon a time, there was a princess.  Though she was always playing with the boys, she really wasn't boyish.  She was beautiful, the most beautiful in the land.  Everyone noticed, but nobody ever said anything.  None of the boys ever told her they loved her because she was just too good.  Sadly, she only thought they believed her to be ugly.  Nobody seemed to appreciate her, so she became more and more rough.  When her body was too different in places, she couldn't do that anymore.  Instead, she became a very bold person and tried to scare everyone.  She wanted to seem strong, even if she was weak.  One day, when she was an adult and had moved out, a wandering warrior happened upon her working in her herb garden.  He was so struck by her beauty that he could hardly stand, so he leaned against a rock, hoping to get his balance.  He never really caught it again, though, and she worked for several hours without seeing him leaning there.  When she got up, though, she noticed him.  She rushed over to help him an brought him inside, unaware that her sheer amazingness was what was weakening him.
Sorry, not exactly poetry.  I don't know
May 2014 · 592
The Rain
--- May 2014
It soaks you to the bone
It gets in your socks
It gets in your mouth
Your eyes
Your shirt
It's dark
It's cold
It makes the day seem like a waste
It isn't all bad

It encourages the starting of fires inside
It encourages closeness
It encourages blankets
Candle-lit power outages
Or the watching of movies
It makes plants grow
It feeds the birds
And, of course,
It makes YOU happy
You now who you are.  :)
May 2014 · 435
Take it!
--- May 2014
Take my hand
Take my hand
Don't fall down to
Your neverland

You're falling and you'll
Never land
So take my hand
Not neverland

We'll make it grand!
Completely grand
So take my hand
Take my hand
May 2014 · 417
--- May 2014
I'm uncomfortable
And I don't know why
I don't know what is wrong
But I can't fix it
May 2014 · 337
--- May 2014
Do you ever walk away
And hope you'll be pulled back?
May 2014 · 383
--- May 2014
You leave
You guys are unwilling to be
But I guess
You were always about the easy way
May 2014 · 273
This Road
--- May 2014
I walk this empty road
I know not where I am going
And I forget from whence I came
And I am glad

I am glad for solitary emptiness
The radio is naught but static
I have music around, but I hate it
It makes me remember

These wonderful ruins
This beautiful decay
I relish my thoughts
Even I do not understand them

Sometimes I see another wanderer
I see the trail left behind
The art and the terror
And I pity

This end is just a beginning
This death is my life
For some, this is hell
But heaven is a state of mind
I wrote this for a class.  Thought I'd share it.
Apr 2014 · 412
--- Apr 2014
My debt has been paid
Unspeakable crimes, I'm guilty
Still he died for me
Apr 2014 · 498
I notice
--- Apr 2014
I don't think about it much
You really do care.
I don't think I try nearly as hard
And that makes me sad
But I just want to say
You make me happy
Apr 2014 · 469
1 year
--- Apr 2014
I'm officially crazy
Both about you
And otherwise
Apr 2014 · 797
--- Apr 2014
A cheap shot
Kicked where it hurts
Is exactly what this feels like
Stabbed in the back
And in the front
Images that make me see red
To forget and forgive
I'm so angry
But I can't let it out
Don't want to hurt those who I care
I don't know who I blame
Maybe myself
I'll put these feelings away on the shelf
In some drawer
Lose them
And try to be selfless
I'm so lazy
Apr 2014 · 317
Finding smiles
--- Apr 2014
Be hopeful
Because that smile
Might be right around the corner.
All you have to do is
Find it.
It's there
I promise
Apr 2014 · 314
--- Apr 2014
I have nothing to say
Nothing to write
Nothing to feel
No, not anymore.
Everything has changed
My eyes are open
And I want to close them
But what I've seen can never leave
You cannot undo the past
Cannot undo my past
Cannot bear to see the future
Apr 2014 · 231
--- Apr 2014
I see the cycle
And well, it is terrible
When will this crap end?
Apr 2014 · 236
--- Apr 2014
The day gets worse
I am angry for some reasons
Guilty for others
And my optimism for later is gone
I hate this

I don't cry often, but
I feel too close
--- Apr 2014
This storm will blow over
And it'll be alright
I think I'm ready to try
Apr 2014 · 395
--- Apr 2014
I am exhausted
Body and Soul
And yet
Struggles continue

I just want to sleep
Apr 2014 · 510
--- Apr 2014
It's getting warm out
I can enjoy being outside
The only issue
Short-shorts are in season
And I'm blinded by the pasty-****-white legs
Filling the school
Apr 2014 · 428
Sunlight too
--- Apr 2014
Overbearing heat
No snow in sight
It's perfect
My element
I am home
Apr 2014 · 1.0k
--- Apr 2014
The sun is always welcome
Beating down on me
Pushing the sweat out
Tearing off the gloom
I am seldom happier
Than when I am in the sun
Apr 2014 · 257
--- Apr 2014
Sometimes running
Sometimes in the shade
Sometimes herding
Sometimes wanting to play

Always happy
Apr 2014 · 1.8k
--- Apr 2014
All day
And I still found
Great things
I am beginning
To trust in the lord
And to know what is right
And why
Apr 2014 · 250
He Pulls
--- Apr 2014
The other guy
Deceives me
Makes me worry
But I know where to look
To find peace
Apr 2014 · 531
Boring (Haiku)
--- Apr 2014
Today I feel useless
I lay in bed despairing
Time crawls when you're sick
Apr 2014 · 474
Sick (Haiku)
--- Apr 2014
I feel really ****** today
Headache and stomachache won't leave
So I think about you
Apr 2014 · 204
Good-bye (Haiku)
--- Apr 2014
I miss you, you know
"I don't want you to go!" It
Makes me miss you more
Apr 2014 · 196
It is good (Haiku)
--- Apr 2014
I am learning to trust
God will not forsake me, never
Never been so at peace
Apr 2014 · 175
Smiling (Haiku)
--- Apr 2014
I read a book here
She would be really proud of
Me, doing what she likes
--- Apr 2014
I think that all I
Need to do is talk to mom
But I will be angry
Mar 2014 · 563
Is it true?
--- Mar 2014
Sometimes I don't know
What I should do
Will it hurt somebody?
Maybe I'll just stay in bed
Mar 2014 · 7.2k
--- Mar 2014
Why does music always have to
Be self expression or support some cause?
I just want to relax when I listen
Not consider my life
Or at least, not always
Mar 2014 · 605
--- Mar 2014
Become part of the mindless masses
Be secure in your lack of identity
And then wake up when you are brave enough to be insulted
Mar 2014 · 347
--- Mar 2014
And here I sit
Refreshing my email
What do I expect?
Mar 2014 · 427
The Glass Bottle
--- Mar 2014
Why is it empty?
Has it been emptied?
Or has it just not been filled?
Interpret as you wish.
Mar 2014 · 1.1k
--- Mar 2014
What is your happiness?
Mine is

A hot day
Shared with my love

Games to play
Without any price
But not illegal

To my heart's content
With very little risk

Anime to watch
With all the time to finish them
And all the seasons to come

I could go on
But tell me
What is your happiness?
Imagine it
Perhaps write about it
I would love to know
Mar 2014 · 339
All I can ask
--- Mar 2014
All death could ever ask for is life
All hell could ever ask for is heaven
All hate could ever long for is love
All the earth could ever want is the sky
And all I could ever want is you.
For my love.
Mar 2014 · 685
The fall
--- Mar 2014
The unending fall
Without a beginning
Is no fall at all

Nobody falls
Without jumping
Or being pushed
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