Tark Wain

Tark Wain Apr 2016

Love is not unbreakable
It is not undeniable
Nor is it everlasting
Love can not conquer worlds
Love isn't hard to define
because that implies that it can be
Love exists (if at all) in fleeting moments
so quick that if you blink you'll miss it

We can not see the proton
We can not touch gravity
We can not hear silence
We can not taste air

We can not feel love

Tark Wain Apr 2016

I should have never met you

You said there would be a next time
and in that moment I wondered if there wouldn't be
and there wasn't
is that my doing
or was it all inevitable
did there have to be a next time
that wouldn't occur
it was never going to end easily
so what if it just never ended
what if by next time
you didn't mean next week
or next year
but sometime down the road
if there's always a next time
then nothings truly over right?
It's amazing the lack of finality in it all
I just can't let it end
I'm obsessed with writing story book endings
with characters I know all to well
Happily ever after isn't an ending
it's a cop out
nothing ever ends well
that doesn't make sense
if something was so great why should it end
which leaves two possibilites
A it was never that great to begin with
or
B it hasn't truly ended yet
My heart wishes it was B
but my mind knows it's A
which *****
it does
do you think the eiffel tower was the first thing the french came up with
there must have been other suggestions right?
other options
that didn't allude to that great big beautiful tower
i'm getting drawn into the abstract
but the point stands
the eiffel tower is an iconic message
but at a time it was nothing
just an idea behind an idea
maybe nothing is what we want it to be
maybe we build our own diorama's and view life how we see fit
it would make sense
you see what you want
but if you turn around you'll see the world for what it is
not the candy coated box where you dwell
but an open room where objects lay where they lay
for no other reason than that they lay
I'll never be perfect
I know that
but I think I'll always try to perfect my world
make it better... for me of course but the nobility is just in it's own right
you're too random
you don't fit the script
so maybe you should have never read lines
in the first place

Tark Wain Mar 2016

I Stand Alone in a Quiet Room

I Stand Alone in a Quiet Room
It is hauntingly beautiful
I run my hand along the walls
I feel the texture
It feels safe
The silence is comforting
I turn the light on
Nothing in the room can escape my gaze

I Stand Alone in a Quiet Room
As a woman's hair is pulled
As she is thrown around
Screaming and yelling
For someone she knows can not hear her
She struggles to regain her balance
As her virginity is taken
And then she is left to rot

I Stand Alone in a Quiet Room
As a child starves
Because where he lives
Food only comes once a month
Even though his ancestors used to hunt for themselves
But their ways were deemed "savage"
He is left here
Wailing away in a refugee tent

I Stand Alone in a Quiet Room
Even though just a mile away
A man is beaten on the street
Because the way he walked was different
Because the way he talked was different
Because a man's hips shouldn't move like that
He cried the whole time
I didn't hear any of it

I Stand Alone in a Quiet Room
How selfish of me
But I shouldn't open that door
Then I would hear
And the silence is comforting
The noise is terrible
It consumes my every thought
I will stay here

I Scream in a Room
I am no longer alone
As someone pins me to the ground
taking everything I hold dear against my will
Yet no one will come
Because they are either gone already
Or they are standing alone
in their own quiet rooms

Tark Wain Feb 2016

Am I....?

If a tree falls in the forest
and no one hears it
and presumably if the tree fell
it follows that it was dead
if all these things happen
is the tree real?
does it exist?
is it tangible?

let me backtrack
there's a sprout
and it blooms
grows taller
grows branches
and then one day
as you well know
it falls

was it real?

reality is subjective
it makes me wonder
what real is
we are real
in the sense that we, right now, have consciousness
but that's not what I'm worried about
in the grand scheme of things
in the forest that is our universe...

Am I...?

No
I'm talking about a tree
in a forest
not me
in this world
was it real?
tell me
tell me

did it matter?
did any of it matter?
the time lighting took off a slab of bark
the time two birds made love on it
the time a squirrel nestled inside it
the time a leaf fell and smacked a little boy in the face
yes it happened
but was any of it REAL?

These are somber thoughts
they reek of depression
angst
i've put up walls around myself
which are fine to keep out intruders
but it seems I did not give myself the key
what am I hiding?
what do I not want me to know?

Am I...?
I found it
the key
I need to finish the sentence
but I can't imagine the weight of that question
how can I question that of myself
do it
ask

Am I.......
.....
...........
real?
Does any of it matter?
and if some of it does
am I losing sight of those things
have I lost my connection to reality
am I alone
is this all there is?

If I fall in a forest
and no one hears it
and presumably if I fell
it follows that I was dead
if all these things happen
was I real?
did I exist?
Was I tangible?

Tark Wain Feb 2016

Struggling

I'm struggling to write the first few lines of this poem
1. because I haven't written in awhile
and 2. Because I think it will be a very good poem
and don't want youto abandon it
trust me
we give up too easily
for example
when I'm older I want to write movies
but when I watch a movie I constantly check my phone
even if I like the movie
we are worse off than we know
I've been thinking
lately
that is a lie
it's only been recently
very recently
regardless
why I do write best when I am depressed?
why is that when I am most profound
why must my life be strewn about around me
for me to have a grasp on literary prose
then again is it wrong of me
to consider my only important writing
the ones that can be deemed "good"
is that unfair to myself
there's a select few I always come back to
they are very good
but I was hurting a lot when I wrote them
were they worth it
maybe
I remember something I read one time
it was written by a woman
and she was talking about her pain
and her writing
she said that pain was now fluid in her life
all that really mattered was her writing
no matter how much the pain hurt
as long as her writing benefited
she would welcome it with open arms
what a **** way to live
maybe it's just nostalgia
that's *******
you wrote better before
you know that
I'm right
I've become a better person
and a worse writer
and both
frighten me

Tark Wain Dec 2015

Fate

Fate
F
A
T
E
Fate

F
for friendship
for firsts that last for forever
for felicity fidelity and the occasional felatio
for freedom from fear
for feeling... even when you thought you'd forgotten
for yes ******* but also
for fenagling fanoodling and fondling
for familiar
F

A
for absolute
for ASAP ATM and AWOL
for any day now we'll fall out of love
for alright this can't last
for all the time this was possible?
for always
for absent absinthe abstaining and affirming
for affinity
A

T
for trying
for tell me your favorite color one more time
for trash being someone's treasure
for time we get to spend
for tenderness and togetherness
for the truth even when it's hard
for thank god for typography
for take my hand
T

E
for everything
for everyone looking at us like we're crazy
for excuse me for finding something that matters
for eclectic electric elements
for especially
for exceptions
for explicit emotions
for enrichment
E

it takes 4 letters to spell a word
but one more to make it work
and that letter is
U

#love

Tark Wain Dec 2015

That's A Feeling

A team of black doctors
working to save the life
of a KKK member

That's a feeling

A man shot dead
attempting to stop
the **** of a woman he didn't know

That's a feeling

A man not getting a job
because "He Was Mexican"
even though he grew up in Maine

That's a feeling

A Muslim teacher
stabbed by a student
who didn't want to be taught by a "terrorist"

That's a feeling