My intentions weren't to hurt you. I wasn't as good as a friend as I wanted to be. I do care about you because I want you to get help. I still want you to get the help you need, but I know I  can't help you the way you need. It would be selfish for me even to pretend I could. I hurt you and you hurt me.   I wish you could see how much I honestly care about you. I hope one day you will.

you've been gone longer than you were even here (stop trying to add me on social media)

you don't get to be written about (anymore), don't get to see where I am, how I've grown

fairy tales do exist, you just weren't mine (sixteen year old me would be crushed)

I remember the times when we used to laugh
at any little thing
There was no tension, no silence
No feelings of emptiness

I remember the times when we used to smile
at any little thing
at each other, while the sun rays beat off our youthful faces
Not a worry in the world

I remember the times when we used to talk
about any little thing
all of the time
with no silences creating a barrier between us

I remember the times when we used to hold hands
for no reason at all
Your fingers wrapped gently around my delicate hands
firm and protective, strong like you were never going to let go

I remember the times when we used to kiss
passionately and longingly
Our lips intertwined
puckering for more

But mostly I remember the times when we used to love
unconditionally
undoubtedly
wholeheartedly
Like no one else in the world mattered.