Where have you gone?
No light in your eyes and no voice in your words.
Everything is gone,
This isn't the one I thought I knew...

Dear ~~~
I just want to let you know,
Before I fall apart on you,
Or I fall for you--
I live in a shipwreck of my own design,
Am scared of what I am capable of,
And admire the frightening
Endless
Night sky.
I step cruelly on
My own emotions and those who
Twist my own words and
Use me as a door mat,
While twisting my knife deeper into my heart,
But my tears are invisible
And my screams are silent.
You need to look beyond my smiling,
Look into my eyes.
They only smile when you are here.

I'm missing you,
A warm presence,
The only time I dare to be myself.
And yet,
Better than I am
When I'm around you.

Did I walk away
Or was it you?

U
G
L
Y

Slides off my tongue,
The words I use to talk to you,
And the words I use to describe myself.

I gambled with fire,
Gave my mind away,
It turned my heart to dust,
And now it turned way.

Avoid answering
By asking unrelated questions.

It works every time,
Even when it wasn't wanted.

Like the last burst of a storm,
The last stroke of a brush,
The last detail added...

I
Gave
Up the fight.
Now
will you?


Would you call it cowardice
To kick someone who
is down and
surrendered?

Even you don't know my fears,
Sometimes I don't.
I try to hide them from myself,
But they just eat
Eat
EAT
On my insides,
Begging my attention,
Boiling in my acidic blood,
Screaming in my ears,
My mind,
I'm growing numb to my surroundings,
Dissolving into my own background,
Yet it still
Eats,
Burning holes in my heart,
The soles of my shoes
Wearing thin as I try to run from it
Only to return
Again.

Above the keyboard are hands,
Working hands, trying to create something beautiful.
They can feel out the words,
But they cannot hear or see.

Above those hands are arms,
That can hold,
But they cannot see either.

Looking at you,
You are not just something beautiful.
You are beautiful, inside, outside,
Even if you can't see,
Even if you can't hear,
Or touch
Or smell
Or taste,
Your heart can.

And create something beautiful.