i went from craving
desires,
sxxxually.
to spurning alliance,
definitely.
from the stroking of ego,
walls evasively caressed;
to a glimpse of all that’s righteous,
& a conscience yet undressed.
drowning in depth of
intimacy,
clouding respective
intuity.
fxxxcking the **** out of my
actuality.
in reality,
there was no mutuality.
only a tempered battle flee,
consisting of my soul’s attempted plea,
to be free.

down play my intelligence
one time
then you’re irrelevant.
i’m witty
not so hesitant.
my instinct
nearly
heaven sent;
a part of
my inheritance.
you rival
my benevolence,
like Ann Frank in the Netherlands,
i hide behind my diligence.
my innocence,
equivalent
to my feeling
ambivalent.
-

i see no point in investing my energies where they are not appreciated or understood.
i will not tirelessly try to make my presence known when there is not a spec of effort to acknowledge.
i have no interest in stroking dying egos
or watering plants that are complacent in their withering.
i will not make a space for what intentionally brings me to my knees, no matter the emptiness i suffer.
-
alone or accompanied,
i am living.
free & fearlessly,
wearing armor made of distance.
moving carelessly,
no regrets
& no resistance.
still
you are not worthy,
but you are who you are.

you make everything your sword.
running back to misconceptions,
strength & wit play the accord.
un-intimidated by wisdom,
unbothered,
unchanging.
consistent and complacent
but the patience is ranging.
from steady to dying
unfit but you’re trying.
misfit,
no denying
there’s nothing to confide in.
but you envision a love,
unkind,
unrequited.
in desperate need of
a simple teaspoon of new guidance,
dismiss all of the bad energies you’ve invited.
we’ll only survive if we fight it.

you’re my bestfriend,
like a side-kick made perfectly for me.
you’ve seen the deepest parts,
beneath the skin
like no one else can see.
i carried you inside,
& now my soul remains outside.
a fairy,
fearless,
magical,
unique
sent here to guide.
-
i call you daughter,
i call you light,
i call you healer of the sight.
i call you queen
my heart your throne,
i call you spirit of the moon.
being with more meanings than one,
a product far beyond the sun.
you were created out of mercy
to remind me of a love.
-
to spread and
teach the world on how to smile again.
you are my friend,
a keeping love until the end.
long as you’re here
ill be alright,
ill keep on smiling,
keep the fight.
you are my friend
& ill love you til the end.