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Jennifer Staples Feb 2015
I no longer cry for him, but I'll always die for him. He meant that much to me, he was my world. I still feel the sting of the pain from his words and actions. Those, I fear, will never disappear. I'm not 'in love' with him anymore, but I will always love him. He'll hold a special place in my heart forever. I don't long for him at night time anymore, and he's not constantly on my mind anymore either, is this a good thing? I got a chance to see him and hang out with him, and it wasn't awkward, and I didn't feel the overwhelming urge of just wanting to hold him like he was mine to hold. I honestly didn't feel anything, but pain, hurt, and a hint of disgust. Is that bad? He's not mine, and I don't want him to be mine. But, why do I keep the drawings of him, or the Christmas card he gave me, or the pictures of him. All they do is bring back memories, and reminds me of how much his words, "I love you, Jenny... Now and Always" were all a lie, and they remind  me of how much I was so deeply in love with someone whose love for me vanished for whatever reason. All they do, is remind me of all the pain he caused me, and all the unseen tears I shed over him. I should get rid of them, to end all the pain they remind me of right?
So, this is about my ex, I was in love with him, and now this how I feel....

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