I am a prisoner

In a cell i made myself

Help me

Let me out of here

My other self is stronger

Saying i should just stay here in the cell

She's making the words that would help me out of of here pass through my other ear

She's saying things that makes me afraid of going out

and just stay in the cell

She's too strong

What do i do?

I been locked up in this cell for a long time now

Please

Help me escape

How can i love myself

When she say's i'm worthless

I wanna trust others who are saying that i matter

but as i said, she's making those words pass through my other ear

I am not alone

But i am alone

I only get to go out this cell in public
I fake a smile

Wear a mask to hide these tears

I can't let people know about my demon which is my other self

Because i know

No one will ever understand me

No one would dare to save me

I don't matter

But please

I'm begging you

Save me from me

Save me from the demon inside me

I'm tired of pretending

Pretending that i'm okay

Pretending that i'm happy

Pretending that i'm strong

I want to cry freely

Express the real me

I don't wanna fake a smile no more

No one wants to go deeper

Nobody wants to see the demon inside me

No one dared to save me

And it's so unfair

For i help others but no one helps me

I see the demons of others and i never left those people

They left me

Can't you see?

I'm tired of helping and not receiving any help

Please, for once i wanna receive help

You are the most wonderful person i've ever met

You lift me up when i'm down

You hurt me with truth

And that's better than telling me what i want to hear

You met me at my best

You stayed at my worst

And you're still here with me

You are the moon that gives brightness to my dark world

You are a goddess inside and out

You

I love you

I love everything about you

And you

You can't be mine

I just want to give up but i can't for there are many people who roots for me

If i leave them, they'll cry

It won't be easy for them to forget about me

The me that i never knew

The happiness that they saw in me will be gone

Happiness that i never saw myself

All the things they loved about me will be gone

Things that i never saw myself

But if i'm not gonna end this now, how long will i suffer?

I've been suffering for a long time now, so you mean to tell i have to suffer more?

Is the pain i'm feeling right now not enough?

Oh well, since when did i became enough? Hmmm, that's right! Never in my life

Not even a single day in my life

I'm sorry i'm just tired of finding my worth

You'll understand if you're in my situation

Now that you know how hard my suffering is

Is it okay now to leave the people who believes in me?

Please tell me that that's already an enough reason

Please, let me rest

Feeling like where ever i am

Where ever i go

I don't belong

I exsist but do i really exsist?

It's like i'm screaming for attention

But no one hears it

Or maybe they refuse to listen to it

I'm tired of feeling alone in a crowded room

I hear everyone but they can't hear me

I hear their laughters

Everyone is happy without me

Everyone have someone to talk to

While i don't

I want to break these walls

I want to befriend people

But i'm afraid that i might just build walls all over again

I'm tired of being alone but scared of having friends

Baby, tell me why can't i love you the way you love me?

Why am i choosing you as a friend??

I don't deserve you, baby
You love me even if i don't return the love

I tried several times to push you away from me, but there you are, hurting, but still loving me

You don't deserve me, i don't deserve you
Please, free yourself from me
I can't love you
But i love you

I love you, but not in the you want me too
You deseve better
Please, let go

Be with someone who'll love you the way you want me to love you

Be with someone who makes you happy the way i make you happy

Be with someone who you can be yourself with, like you being yourself with me

Be with someone i'm not
Because you see, i do love you
I make you smile
You can be yourself with me

But, that someone can't be me
I'm not that someone
Yes, i do love you, but believe me i'm not that someone

You don't deserve me
I love you but not in the way you want me to
You don't deserve me

I dated an actor

He told me that he loves me.
He told me that he'll fight for me.
He told me i'm the only one.

Hey, guess what? It was an act all along.

Stuck.

All those good nights and good mornings are now a memory

It will forever remain a memory because you're not mine anymore

All those i love you's and i love you too's keeps haunting me

Baby, i wish we could turn back time from the old us, the happy and in love us.

Now it's just me, no you, no us

I'm left alone stuck with your precious memory while you're making new memories with your new world.

My whole world got ruined by the person who helped me build that world.

Baby, tell me how could i ever forget you, please teach me how

You taught me to love you, now teach me how to forget you

I most of the time hate rain

But on the other hand

I'm thankful for the rain

For it helps me hide my tears

And let out the pain I'm hiding

It's most of the time my enemy

Because I hate its thunder and lightning

But the truth is i can't accept more rain in my life

For it has been raining in my life since day one

I've been sad since i started to have a mind of my own

And all I want is for the rain to stop

I wanna see the sun shine on me

All i want is to experience happiness

Is that too much to ask?