how was it
that the same lips that ensnared his affection
could ensnare the silence
of death?

I've had to discard my watch
And duct tape my clocks
Into a black electrical silence

Time is never enough
And with him,
I wish it'd stop
Completely

I am who you long to see
Yet who you will never cease to be

I am what you envy most
But I am more dead than a ghost

I am little, small and weak
Yet I do more, much more than speak

In my eyes I hold the key
But to get it, you must first unsee

For days of cold when lights grow dim
I am yours- I am him.

Over the tabletop
Nothing to do
They're lonely and empty
From not touching you

They lounge and they dance
They tap and they wait
But your skin's not there
And they anticipate

The day that they'll find
The touch that they crave
On the hips of the one
Who they intend to save

And meanwhile, my heart
waits on and forever, stuck
swinging like my fingertips
without love's luck

Why do you darken my door once again?
What is it I've done
to deserve
this
e m  p   t    y    
s      p       a        c         e          ?

To spite you,
I'll welcome you.

To scold you,
I'll embrace your cold.

shiver, shiver

Here you come again,
lancing at my dreams,
my hopes,
my visions,
all of which I want to capture on paper,
but all of which you turn out
like horses from a stable
into the wilderness beyond
the reach of my pen.

Desperate.
It is not your namesake, no;
neither is it mine.

It does not belong to the man who searches for wisdom,
to the girl who bleeds her fingers on typewriter keys.

O, desperation, make me a statue
that others may look upon my emptiness
and feel
whole.