he says emotions are my down-fall...
then i show him
how destructive words can be.
-

you might catch me slipping,
ever so slightly.
you may slide by
or slide in,
and i might lose focus.
-
clocks ticking til the moment i awake from this slumber,
til this naive,
way too easy,
no give but take,
let's up.
-
i can *******,
like i can ******* up in the head,
but ill use you for my rituals instead.

mouths moving,
still not sure what you speak
or why you speak...
-
no one seems to agree with me,
shut the **** up.

with a loaded gun to my head
and a sincere smile;
i wish you'd speed it up...

for several years
i've written poems about
boys & men,
heart-breaks
and trends
and cries
of who's and why's.
-
notice a pattern in the way i spill words.
notice how i sway,
clumsily.
notice how i chase
the boys & men
that run from me.

my nerves wreck upon confronting,
i'd rather stand back
at the back of the room.
find me at the nearest exit,
off-setting the center of attention.
avoiding conversation with
dismissive head-nods
& wondering why i came...
-

if you'd ask,
i'd tell you darkness is my preference.
-
though,
gory meets glory
and glow,
you should know
that i am dark and in part,
i am light.

selective silence,
in particular,
to whom and of what i speak.
-

obscured vision
of my limbs turning stiff,
bearing branches and leaves.
i look at trees and think,
"my, wouldn't that be amazing"
to be as strong and sturdy,
to be so still
and still so worthy;
to be so grounded,
and earthy.

energies channeled on behalf of
heat & friction,
fast paced-motion
and fingers gripping throat;
turned themselves against themselves
then gained strength.
-
sacred energy,
no longer strictly in heats of moments;
now there's heat in every moment.