a single dog
walking alone on a hot sidewalk of
summer
appears to have the power
of ten thousand gods.

why is this?

Dear Mr. Bukowski,

I found what I loved the most in this world,
and I let it **** me,
destroy me,
devour me...

...now what?

I'm the type of girl who feels a little too useless
who believes that everyone has to leave a mark.

I'm the type of girl who believes she must save everyone.

I was so busy trying to save someone else,
I forgot for a moment that I too could drown.

... to tell you the truth.

you are delightfully
uncomplicated --
rational, funny,
no-nonsense, no drama,
and with you everything is
simple
and black-and-white.
but me, I'm used
to my life in shades of grey
and intrications
interest me --
what is life without a little
chaos?
oh, if only I could love you --
but all I've ever truly loved
is her confusion
and how delightfully
complicated
that made things.

i know words can't describe
Your love
i know words can't describe
Your majesty
i know words can't describe
Your grace
i know all the words in the sky
and all the words on the earth
cannot describe You.
all words cannot explain
who You are.
with my words
i'll paint Your love
with my words
i'll paint Your majesty
with my words
i'll paint Your grace.
i know all the words in the sky
and all the words on the earth
cannot describe You.
i know all words cannot explain
who You are
but i will try.

how can i not believe in You
when creation is singing Your praises?
how can i not believe in You
when the roaring seas declare Your majesty?
how can i not believe in You
when You are everywhere?
You are in the highest mountain
on the tallest tree
in the greenest forest
in the deepest sea.
You are in a child's smile
in a baby's laughter
in a lion's roar
in a sparrow's tune.
it's all You.
it's all Yours
and i am Yours, too.

i am
tangled and caught
in my sin
disgusted and horrified that
i've done it once again
and i want to cry
but i can't
and i am so sorry
and i forget about You
and who You are
and what You do
but at the end
i always remember
who You are
and what You do
and i hear Your voice
it's singing
a tune of forgiveness
a tune of grace
the sweet tune enters my soul
and my heart
it courses through my blood
and it makes it
white as snow
it makes my brokenness
beautiful.

We are molecules
and atoms
on a zit
on the ***
of the universe.
Why do we
make big deals
out of anything?