Old Neil crossed the ocean for it
Van Gogh died longing for it
Wars have been started because of it
Poe died poor and broken without it
Morrison had it but couldn’t grasp it
Shakespeare died with its taste in his mouth
His quill dripping with its potent potion
Its evasiveness lingers in my father’s eyes
I am pale and hollow without it
I’ve danced with it ...
Stared into convincing eyes
Yet I stand with empty hands
An empty heart
Many have traveled far and wide
And just as many will grow old
Searching
For a
"Heart of gold"

******* ducking

Never ever clever

Just evasiveness

Cowardice

Not a facit of wit

like Matt says

WW3 is on its way

///

see / if you are just a kid

you may not understand what it's all about

But

Those that do are stressing on it

And you are around them all the time

"""""""

Your teachers
Your parents

Your neighbors
Etc

The older you are the clearer you see it
The more deeply you feel the stress
and know what it is

And if you are a kid you feel ( and completely so )
Everybody else's stress but you think it's origins

Is inside yourself ........

and hence ......... The depressions

The sense of unworthiness
The lovelessness
Etc

//

Now
To explain myself a bit

I am 70 years old

Kinda isolated

//

I talk to the elders ( so to speak )

They are very busy !

The 40-50 year olds are still saying
It's just a political thing

But by their stress we know they know better

//

I try to talk to them

But they get agitated quite easily

( which is how you can know they know )

///

kids do what you kids out there do

So there's no need to describe it

•

All I've been trying so say to you -- is

Please stop hurting yourselves

& that the forces that are driving you

Are not your own but our horrors

And that it seems that the combining

*** with love

Is kinda messing up your heads

And

That both are sacred

But they are not the same thing

•

Love is more universal and only if you start

By each one really loving all of the rest

As a natural phenomena

( in fact -- a natural Right )

As a prelude to the " pairing up " business

Can you survive

•

( happiness ?

we can talk of THAT later ! )

//

So

if I have seemed harsh or seem harsh or seem harsh

In the future

It's not from lack of love

///

Matt says

Sept 2015 !

THE COLLAPSE OF AMERICA !

The people I still talk to say the same

/:/

I don't say this to stress you out

But the stress levels and the public evasiveness

Will intensify drastically in the months ahead

"""""

So like I said

IT IS REALLY THE TIME TO LOOK COMPLETELY

TOWARD YOUR INNER STRENGTH

TO LOOK TOWARDS EACH OTHER

AND TO NOT SEEK SALVATION IN FANTASY

Forged while in utero (the crucible concocting conception),
the fluke of biology begat
me – a happy go lucky boy, whose vulnerable uber travails
susceptibly sprung sly as a cat
on a hot tin roof, where the faux pas survivalist diktat
burrowing into my figurative,
   elusive, and divisive gofer hole decreed éclat
where solitariness didst a ford

   driven psychologically by obsessive fiat
a compulsion to grip tightly
   with distorted, dispirited and disgruntled guilt
evasiveness where schizoid personality disorder
   rudely rued the day halt
ting natural development
   of body, mind and spirit, a rampant insult

finding thyself as a kid alienated, deviated, and gravitated by jolt
like electric shock from how peers responded to knocked
down confidence, egoism, faith, et cetera within self locked
and linkedin to an identifiable causes
   (which said malady) – marked
by painfully being shy, debased fortitude,
and intimidation noted

prominently when thee papa found him walking toward me,
where he orbited
from the dark side of me noggin
   with no intent at harm, yet a portent
welled up inside

   mine chromosomal maternal and paternal quotient
whereat this unease generated an unspoken radiant
cowering reaction training thyself crouch with silent
body language that bespoke volumes expressing torment
with nary a clue (meaning approximately  
   xl plus years ago) only the unguent
of magic powers to disappear

   since silent springs restrained thee to vent
and only when this sole son started a family of his own and went
back to visit parents did a diminution
   sans cower take the shortest xing

in heyday of inferiority spurred (a veritable bee line back
tummy honey combed hive), or if feeling especially intense – a yurt
would answer the call of duty, and once inside
close all the zippers.

.




WE ARE ALL  .... BROKEN !

(We read this line many times every day )

WE ARE ALL ..... ( therefore ) BREAKERS !

( nope ! -- never see this one ! )

::

THIS EVASIVENESS ABOUT TAKING RESPONSIBILITY
IS GETTING ME MAD !

( no ! No! no !  )

None  of this RESPONSIBILITY **** around here !

This is VICTIM CENTRAL !

//

so

The deal seems to be

That some nebulous force

( possibly even actual reality )

Is BREAKING helpless but innocent people

With no human agency

& that there's nothing that can be done

But to cut our bodies

Write poems about it

& have

LET'S FEEL SORRY FOR OURSELF
sessions

For we are but the plaything  of an evil god

/:/

******* !

))

WE

ARE HURTING EACH OTHER !

WE ARE HURTING EACH OTHER

BECAUSE WE KEEP DOING THINGS

IN A BRAZENLY STUPID MANNER

AND DONT FEEL LIKE MAKING

THE EFFORT TO LEARN ABOUT LIFE !

:/:

WE ARE ...: broken :...NOT BECAUSE WE HAVE

BEEN ABUSED

BUT BECAUSE WE ARE ABUSERS !

::

We have traded in our humanity

To be part of this herd mentality

•

In short

WE ****