I paused the movie to hear the couple fighting outside.
She said "You haven't talked to me at all tonight!"
and he said "What?"

But I know what they really meant to say was "I get stupid when I see you and I don't know what to do about it."
Then she slapped him and ran back inside crying.
It was an awkward moment for me in someone else's life.

It made me think about the video on how penguins mate forever.
And about how we're not penguins and how monogamy makes promises like traps
And how the only thing we have in common with penguins
is that we give each other rocks
and that means I love you until the sun explodes.

And how?

How come penguins can get it more right than us?
They can't even fly.

And when I watched this kid clutch his face as he wondered what he did wrong,
I can't help but ******* hate
all the happy penguins for him.

You stupid penguins,
you all look like you're going to a fancy party all the time
you stupid penguins
you run like your pants are down
you stupid penguins
you're gonna have someone to sit on the couch with forever
and you can't even fly!

What happens when you realize your penguin lover is immature
and he overeats the fish
and he's always late to things?

What happens when you realize your she-penguin has really bad penguin depression and you don't know how to deal with it?

What happens when you realize you both met too early and now you're different penguins?

I'll tell you what happens.
They stay together.
You know why?
Because he gave her a ROCK.
That's why.
Because, to penguins
rocks mean more than mortgages
and wanting to go to Hawaii
and step children
and sprinklers
and school districts.
They can keep a marriage alive with some instincts
and a ******* egg to sit on.
PENGUINS
Stay together longer than 50% of any couple you've ever met

And they can't even fly!

But maybe a bird
that knows how to fall in love better than us
doesn't need to know how to do that.

I am a penguin, a stupid bird,
That trained her wings to swim
In circles through dark cold waters.
Contrary to popular belief not
All penguins mate for life,
Warm water penguins do,
But emperor penguins only stay
Together for winter and most
Of that time it’s a long distance
Relationship. They use the idea
Of each other to keep warm.
I wonder if emperor penguins
Break up when spring comes,
Or do they simply go their
Separate ways without explanation.
I am a warm water penguin who’s
Found herself in foreign waters.  
Do not fall for emperor penguins
Yes they are tall and beautiful,
But they only need you for winter.
He will call you pretty and say
He misses you, he will see you in
The spring. These words are not for you.
When the sun breaks through
He will not answer your calls.
He will not say goodbye, and you
Will not be able to enjoy the warmth
Because you long for the delusion of winter
Because you worry that you wasted your
One shot at love or rather he did.
Stupid bird, now you know:
You can believe in love at first sight
But there is no guarantee that
Your penguin will love you back.