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280 · Aug 2015
N V
R Aug 2015
N V
I just want to stop thinking about you for at least a few moments.
Being busy helps, but my heart still finds a way to ache...ugh.
280 · Jun 2015
d & depression
R Jun 2015
i hate all these highs and lows,
why can't i just be
high on
you?
280 · Apr 2013
Not enough for you. (9w)
R Apr 2013
I'll never be
b r o k e n
enough for
You,
Will I?
280 · Jul 2015
i.
R Jul 2015
i.
i don't think it's a coincidence anymore.
the universe is rarely so lazy.
oh ****
280 · Oct 2015
5w
R Oct 2015
5w
i take it all back,
and a comma
I'm currently shaking and crying, whats new?
280 · Jun 2013
Want me? Work for it, babe.
R Jun 2013
I'll give you a
piece of my
mind
after you spare me
a token of your
heart.
I'll let you know
what I want to
find
and I'll even give
you a good place to
start.
280 · Oct 2014
Parked
R Oct 2014
I parked outside her house, watching the leaves as they fell from the trees, and I realized that maybe nothing will always be green. Everything changes from the wind to my weight, and I know this is something that I'll always hate.
Prompt
279 · Dec 2015
R, 12/20
R Dec 2015
i heard you died last night.
it was an overdose they said.
maybe crack?
maybe ******?
who knows...
you used so much.
you'll never know him.
she was upset,
but then she was slightly happy.
but now she's just worried.
he'll never know you.
he might blame them for
never meeting you.
maybe he won't even care.
but you ****** it all up.
too ******* self-absorbed in yourself
and your need for speed.
so honestly,
here are my condolences.
but all in all,
i'm glad that you never had
the chance to be a father.
you didn't deserve it
anyways.
this is probably horrible but he ruined it for himself
being a father/a mother is an honor, and he threw it all away...for what?
279 · May 2013
I believe (5w)
R May 2013
you deserve so much more.
279 · Apr 2014
Love Facts #10
R Apr 2014
You know you're in Love
when you start singing and
making up new melodies
that remind you of her
lips.
279 · Apr 2013
Lol my face
R Apr 2013
The inside of my soul is black.
My brain never stops.
I'm being told death is
A new beginning.
And I'm starting to believe
It.
278 · May 2015
Amy II
R May 2015
a bag full of clothes
and my favorite book:
I didnt know what it meant
I just knew that you were gone,
that you wanted nothing to do with me.
I figured I'd leave you alone,
give you some time to yourself.
You seemed better off without me anyways.
But I didn't know what that bag of clothes
and my favorite book
would do to me.

As soon as I got home,
I opened up the bag
and the first thing I noticed was your scent.
God...I missed my best friends scent.
It's weird, you never really miss something like that
until it's gone.
And I never really thought I'd have to miss that.
I tore through the bag as tears flowed down my cheeks
and my heart broke more and more as I realized
just how many skirts, shirts, and dresses I had shared with you.
God, I miss you.
I miss being able to share my clothes with you
and I miss hearing your laugh.
I miss that time we spent all night talking on the phone
or in your room.
I miss that time you tried to teach me how to twerk,
And I failed miserably.
I miss telling you that your dreams of New York would become reality.
And I miss you, just in general.

I know you've cried because of the pain I've put you through,
And dear god am I sorry for the way I hurt you.
You, more than anyone in this ****** world,
Deserves happiness and love.
I'm sorry for what I did,
For hurting you in the worst way possible,
And I am so sorry for being the complete opposite
Of your best friend.
I love you, and I do not deserve your forgiveness,
but I just need you to know this.
I just need you to know how sorry I am
and how much I love you.
278 · Apr 2013
Last Night (5w)
R Apr 2013
My nightmares were
About you.
277 · Jul 2015
13w
R Jul 2015
13w
It's all going to end anyways, so why not end it all now?
i don't think this one is about suicide but you can read it however you like
don't we all do that anyways?
277 · Nov 2015
A Curse
R Nov 2015
she said I'm this way due to a bloodline curse.
that it's already been broken, but
because i've apparently "decided" to live this way
I will continue to suffer for my
"lifestyle".
I was told today that because I'm not straight I will continue to suffer in my life unless I choose to not be who I am????
I'm not suffering because I'm not straight, I'm suffering because I was once a ****** person who did ****** things.
277 · Oct 2015
Untitled
R Oct 2015
i'll have to move on one day, and i guess its time to start the process, isn't it?
sadly
we barely even had a beginning
R Mar 2015
you reap what you sow, correct?
277 · Jul 2015
Star Struck
R Jul 2015
the universes are aligned in our favor
277 · Nov 2014
Untitled
R Nov 2014
And if you would read between the lines
You would realize that not everything
Is about you.
277 · Jun 2015
10w
R Jun 2015
10w
your tongue spoke in ways that your words never could
i like writing as if i have an interesting life tbh
276 · Nov 2015
Untitled
R Nov 2015
This stupid letter remains in my pocket everyday, as if I'm going to give it to you.
Sigh
276 · Apr 2013
Death
R Apr 2013
What if I died
Tonight?
276 · May 2013
:3
R May 2013
:3
I **** you not,
I'm falling for your eyes.
Words of love
276 · May 2015
C I
R May 2015
C I
And she's a wild thing:
Smoking and drinking and
Doing every guy on the block.
But she's also a human:
She loves and needs and breathes
And she cries when her
Heart is being broken
a p    a   r           t

And she knows me:
A girl who cries and dies,
A girl who loves and needs,
A girl who wants more but
believes she deserves less.

She knows I'm better than that,
Just like I know she's worth so much more than
Those gross guys on the corner of the street and
The tears she cries because of them.

Maybe one day we'll both learn that
heartbreak is just an instrument that
never goes out of tune
and that our hearts will never truly
heal unless we stop giving it to so many others
and start giving it to ourselves.
After all, if we keep our hearts
they can't ever really be broken,
right?
276 · May 2015
Labels
R May 2015
While at church
they asked us a very simple question,
"What label(s) have you given yourself?"
I thought for a second and I shuddered at the thought.
So many different horrible labels laid themselves on my heart
and a few of them stuck out:
Burden,
Unlovable,
Disappointment,
Selfish,
Undeserving.

M­any more came to mind, but these just kept coming back.
I am a burden, because I constantly feel like I annoy everyone and that I am just getting in the way. I'm just worthless, there is no point in burdening people with my existence.
I am unlovable, because how could anyone love me with the things I've done? How could anyone ever love me? Even she couldn't ever love me fully after what I did.
I am a dissapointment, because I am not who my family thinks I am. I know the second I come out, they will shun me. There is no doubt about that. And I've just been slacking with everything. While I may be the "most intelligent" on my family, I am most definitely not the most stable. My highs and lows are starting to get the best of me, and I am so afraid to cry for help. I'll never be as good as them, so I am not only a disappointment to my family, but to myself as well.
I am selfish. Holy hell, I am so selfish. You always told me that I was unselfish, but on the day you found out, it was all I heard. You yelled at me quietly as you sobbed, and I looked at you with tears coming down my face as you asked how I could be so selfish and how I could hurt you like that. I'm sorry. Im sorry. I'm so sorry. I'll never get that image of you out of my mind, it's on a constant replay.
And I am undeserving, because how could I ever deserve something so beautiful ever again? I don't deserve anything but the worst life could give me. Those few weeks after, anytime I cried I had people come and hold me and say, "how could you ever deserve this kind of pain? You don't, you're the sweetest and kindest person I know." But that's the thing, i did deserve it. After what I did to you, I deserved all of the pain in the world. I still do, don't I?
275 · Apr 2013
Dark Soul (10w)
R Apr 2013
I can't see,
Darkness is the brim of my
Soul.
275 · May 2015
10w
R May 2015
10w
If I don't leave now, then I'll never get away.
Maps//The Front Bottoms
275 · Jan 2016
2016
R Jan 2016
how good it felt to leave everything behind
and start the year off right with
you
hope everyone had a lovely night..i know i did :)
R Jul 2013
I have always wished for a
Happily ever after.
I never really got one
Because I don't
Exactly deserve
One.
274 · Aug 2015
N IV
R Aug 2015
I'm having such a hard time with how I feel about him.
I just want to know him more, but I don't want to mess it up this time.
I want him to know how incredible I think he is...but the words seemed to escape me every time I was given the chance.
I'm hoping that this week, maybe I'll be lucky enough to be given just one more chance to tell him.
Maybe this will go nowhere, but ill never know unless I try...right?
274 · Nov 2015
Untitled
R Nov 2015
It's not like I want to move on...but I have to.
274 · May 2015
text message (sent):
R May 2015
for awhile I tried to believe that love could withstand anything, because it's what I've been conditioned to believe. but love isn't like the fairytales, no, not at all. it's full of tears and heartache and it sometimes makes you so incredibly blind and naive. but love always prevails right? no, wrong. love, while it may be something that can transcend past all of space and time and through all of the dimensions, it can be cruel, and once you're in its grasp, it takes you as prisoner and it decides whether or not your time spent in it will be beautiful or destructive, and it also decides what your end will look like--will you come out alive or will you shatter, with pieces of yourself scattered around?
I hope the next time is beautiful and that it won't have to end, but I'm learning that forever is quite a short amount of time.
274 · Oct 2015
5w
R Oct 2015
5w
why couldn't it have worked?
sigh
273 · Apr 2015
8w
R Apr 2015
8w
I've never wanted to understand someone so much.
And it would seem that you want to understand me as well.
273 · Apr 2013
You're worth
R Apr 2013
It's funny,
How much I care about you.
I'm actually, for some reason,
Crying as I write this.

Your eyes...
They're so blue.
You have this one picture
Your eyes look so glossy,
Perfect.

Your lips are pouty
And slightly pink.


What would I do to
Kiss your lips?
Many, many things my dear.

For you, I think I'd give up every life I've got
To live.

You're worth all my lifetimes and more.
273 · Apr 2013
This is me, get over it.
R Apr 2013
I'm not enough.
I'm not her,
To be honest,
I'm *nobody Important.
273 · Oct 2015
Good Good Father
R Oct 2015
Oh, I've heard a thousand stories
Of what they think You're like
But I've heard the tender whisper
Of love in the dead of night
And You tell me that You're pleased
And that I'm never alone

You're a good good Father
It's who You are, it's who You are, it's who You are
And I'm loved by You
It's who I am, it's who I am, it's who I am
Quite possibly at the Top of my list of my favorite songs.
God keeps me strong, He makes me whole, He makes me new.
I'm never alone for He is always with me.
273 · Nov 2015
10w
R Nov 2015
10w
and even on my worst nights,
*im still into you
I'm still into you//Paramore
We'll have our chance soon enough.
272 · Jan 2015
Untitled
R Jan 2015
Burn burn burn
I've never tasted fire until I tasted thee
271 · May 2015
Cosmos:
R May 2015
and through waves, others in the universe will hear us.
I've been doing a lot of research on radio frequencies and it's fascinating.
271 · May 2015
Untitled
R May 2015
How many times have I thrown up the words "Please stay", only to have them shoved right back down my throat?
Too many times to count
271 · Dec 2015
9
R Dec 2015
9
"well...here's the reason you have your headaches!"
you said my C1 is outta place...way outta place.
one of my ribs is kind of outta place, too.
and a few more of my vertebrae as well.
"did you take a lot of painkillers to rid yourself of the pain?
your stomach lining is practically gone!"
yes...much more than i should have.
that's why i'm on the medicine to help rebuild it, you know.
"describe your pain on a scale of one to ten, please."
it's a nine...
"a nine? in your condition, i'd expect a 10, if not more.
you need to start treatments right away if you want
this to go away."
honestly? i've felt much worse.
wonder if he can treat me for a broken heart?
probably not.
271 · Apr 2015
Ray
R Apr 2015
Ray
I'm sure most of you have noticed that my name is Ray on here now, and I would really appreciate it if those who know me in real life to start using Ray as often as possible. It would make me quite happy :) thank you!
271 · Apr 2013
They know...
R Apr 2013
They know....
they know
I'm done.
Finished.
My family is ruined with the image of their
Little girl being touched.
Why'd you tell?
Why?
270 · Jul 2013
That Boy
R Jul 2013
I miss him so
much that I
actually prayed
about him
(I never pray
so this is
weird.)
270 · Jan 2016
Untitled
R Jan 2016
last weekend I was getting better
and then I got worse
and this weekend?
well,
what's the point of going
up
when you can so easily keep
going
down.
no point in anything anymore, really
I'm sorry I hurt you too
270 · Dec 2015
3.
R Dec 2015
3.
i'd give my heart to you if i could, but you deserve a heart that's warm to the touch and still beating on the inside.

*(these walls are frozen and i can't allow you to be turned cold like i am)
for you
269 · Sep 2014
10 word story
R Sep 2014
You kiss my lips like how you kiss my heart.
Trying to write some actual love poems, I've been so illiterate lately and I can never think of anything to write anymore :( I do love you L<3 happy seven months my darling girl.
269 · Apr 2013
Seasons of our love.
R Apr 2013
Autumn
Was the time I fell.

Winter
Was the time I knew.

Spring
Was when I tried to understand.

Summer
If I meant anything to you.
268 · Jan 2016
Untitled
R Jan 2016
I shouldn't have begged for a second chance.
I was right when I said I didn't deserve it.
I don't deserve anything good, you know?
I tried to be someone who did, but I'm not.
I can't be.
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