To battle off intruders
I hired a dog named Goober
He came to me packing heat
I think it is a Luger

He's not a German Shepard
Though his collar and holster are made of leather
He graduated Obedience School
Proudly wearing his Letter Sweater

I pay him in dog biscuits
Which cuts down on doing dishes
As we toss ideas around
When problems arise Goober licks it

He came with papers so all could see
Showing he is the best of breed
Also to lay out on the floor
In case Goober feels the need

Goober has been a great asset
All the intruders around here left
In case you feel the need to ask
...Just don't ask the cat