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Mike Hauser
Poems
Oct 2014
No Elephants Allowed
Pardon me sir,
But you'll have to check your Elephant at the door
Why I've never been so insulted in my life!
This Elephant my friend is a very good friend of mine
I realize that sir,
But we have strict policies at this bar
What kind of establishment are you running here
When two friends can't sit and enjoy themselves a beer
Pardon me sir,
But the last time something like this ensued
We called up the law they called up the zoo
Seems there was nothing that we could do
It was madness and mayhem all over the place
You wouldn't believe the mess those animals made
There were Goats in the kitchen, Monkeys tending the bar
Giving free drinks and free food to the girls
And those **** Giraffes took all the ceiling fans out
Not to mention the mess that was scattered about
With the Hippos and Hyenas laughing it up
It took us forever to get the place scrubbed
So I must insist sir like I said before,
Would you kindly leave your Elephant checked at the door
Written by
Mike Hauser
Sunny Florida
(Sunny Florida)
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