Overwhelming it is
to read your writing
to peak through your life
to know that your struggles are real

Drowning I am
in tears bursting with the memories of you & I
in blood overflowing from wrists that you used to hold
in thoughts exploding over the letters you wrote

Paralysing it is
to have you near me when I am invisible
to hold you close when I no longer sense touch
to hear you scream my name when I am mute

Losing I am
from battling your past
from listening to what is right
from promising not to want you/*us