It's 4:31 am and I'm sitting alone, more dead than alive
I watch as darkness invades the moon, a tear falls from my eye

Old stains of hurt, left on these blank pages to remind where i am
Lost, in despair and so cold that sometimes i forget i am a man

Not just a shadow that i see falling across the room on a wall
Cursing my life, for making me who i am and destroying it all

4:35 am, and it feels like days and weeks have passed by
I don't remember much, i have no clue why i started to cry

It's been always there, inside of me and it feeds on my pain
Winter turns to spring, spring to summer and fall, but it never change

4:40 am, i pick up the blade and poke my wrists
I made it this far and i can't carry on, i have to end it

I remember being happy when i was young, i remember being sad
Being alone on birthdays, 'cause there was no friend i had

I remember having fun on the beach, going mad in the snow
And all this while i was decaying inside, i just didn't know

I knew what love felt like, but i could never replace it with pain
I could never fit in, i was the odd one out, a ******, 'the strange'

4:57 am, i feel the urge to **** myself increasing every minute
I pick up my gun and start putting bullets in it

I can still walk away, if i can make it through this night
But the demons have consumed me, I'm just too weak to fight

I know I'll hurt many people, people who still care
I don't know what to do, i can't find my strength anywhere

I know i've let you down and you were always there for me dad
And it makes it so much more unbearable, that mom, i can never get you back

5:11 am, i guess the only time i smiled was when i was with you my lil' sis
I wish i could take you to the park one last time, there's so much I'm 'gonna miss

I wish i can turn this noise down, which compels me to pull the trigger
But i can see who i am, who i will be clearly in this mirror

I don't want to live in pain, i don't want to be like this
Enough of these lies, therapy and pills, I'm full of that ****

It's the only way out, but i know life can still turn around
Everyone has a story, they don't die and one day they're found

But what if, i won't ever be?, I'll regret i let this moment go to waste  
For i know I'll never do it again, if i don't now, it's a lifetime of wait

I'll die with nothing but hate, at least i can feel the love today  
I don't want to lose that too, get old and die anyway

I don't want them to remember me as a monster, but as a man
Who loved them in his own way, but i know they won't understand

5:30 am, i wish i had been the son you always wanted and couldn't have
Even though you love me, you deserved better than me dad

Lil' sis, i was there when you were born, the most beautiful thing i had ever seen
You'll always be my angel, you and i have always been a great team, sweet dreams

I wish i was there by your side mom, when you took your last breath
You know i loved you, but i felt betrayed when you told me you're 'gonna be dead

I just want to die, i can't shut down the voices in my head
It's been weeks and months and i haven't slept

5:40 am, i pick up the gun, i know what i have to do
I'm sorry sis' but i guess from now on it's 'gonna be just dad and you

6:00 am, sweat trickles down my forehead, I'm afraid and scattered
Maybe I'll meet you soon mom, if there is someplace better

Finger on the trigger, i know it's time for me to leave
I won't let pain take over, i have to put it to sleep









door opens















Little Leslie - yaaawwn.... You forgot to wake me up! Who's 'gonna...... WHAT is that timmy ?









Timmy - I'm sorry but i have to...





















(minutes pass by)








Little Leslie - ok, go ahead, do whatcha 'gotta do, but...... remember you're leaving me all alone by myself, mom is gone now..... and dad barely speaks, all i had was... you,now.... you can too leave!






Timmy - i don't know what to do..  












Little Leslie - just come down and make me breakfast, I'm late for school








(moments pass in complete silence)










Timmy - Leslie.... (starts crying)...i'm sorry i won't....even think about it....... ever again, i....i..i promise!









Leslie - you know i love you and so does dad








Timmy- i know, i love you more than anything









Leslie - than just be my annoying older bro and dads pain-in-the-*** son, it will get better, and that's my promise!








timmy puts the gun down and takes her in his arms, smiling while tears trickle down his eyes and says " how about some ice-cream for breakfast today, princess ?"





































It's 6:31 am and the sun is beginning to rise.