My entire childhood contained in a Disney princess gift bag
Torn and overflowing
A relic from one of my replacements

I don't know their names  
Her do-overs

New children cancel out
Old mistakes

She sends me photos, report cards, awards  
Proof that I existed
In a time before I crumbled
Before she trampled me

I wonder if she terrifies them

There is a Mother construct in my mind
Born of tender moments witnessed
Of hallmark cards
Imperfect but striving

Maybe she loves them
Some way she couldn't love me
A constant reminder of the man she threw away
A life that brings shame
Locking away the proof
The photos
The same place she kept her heart

We've both moved on, now
But I don't mourn her
The loveless ruthless mother

I mourn the construct I imagined
That I never knew her tenderness
Never heard those words