"God?"

"Yes, my son."

"Oh, wow, thanks for answering, dude."

"What can I do for you?"

"Well, it's like this. I have a ******* in-grown
toenail and it is causing me major gyp."

"Have you seen a doctor?"

"You're joking mate. I can't even get to talk to a receptionist."

"And you want me to heal your toe?"

"Yea, basically. Can you help me, Lord?"

"There. You are now free from pain."

"Jesus! My toe is missing! Why would you do that?"

"Why would you bother me with such a ridiculous request?"

"Cos, my toe hurts, and I can't get to see anyone medical."

"Goodbye, my son. Take care of your remaining toes and you
will continue to be pain free."