I was on my laptop playing a high stress game
And I switched tabs and saw that telegram had a notif
My heart beat a million times per second
I could feel it beating through my chest
Much like the time we spent in my backseat, professing our love to each other

My heart beat fast
Palms sweaty
It’s a lot like falling in love
But you aren’t here

I check the message and it’s not you
My heart continues to beat as loud and as fast as it was
Am I relieved that it wasn’t you?
Why did I feel so anxious, thinking it had been you
I wished it was you
I really wished

I hoped you talked to me again
And yes
I am upset that it wasn’t you

Why do we reserve things for special people in our lives?
That thing just gets ruined when they’re no longer there

My heart still beats fast
Trying to calm down
I felt all the symptoms of nervousness all at once
I really hoped it was you
But alas you’ve left my life
I should stop hoping it’s you

I am disappointed it’s not you
Please come back.