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Feb 2022
Shadows are real
they move when you don’t want them too
When you think your taking steps further away, and they slowly move closer towards you
Flash light and colors in your face, sending you signals
But I’m only human, don’t they know I’m not bilingual?
Or has the crack made me lucid
Feel the presence of the other side
Why did they choose to torture me?
Because I didn’t hide? Because I kept getting High?
Maybe because I was close
This devils dying to taste me, inching closer every time I crush his powder.
Making ticks on the clock louder, every minute of every hour.

Our connection was inevitable, I could tell how bad he wanted to break through
Enough for him to convince me,
crashing my car was how I’d get to you.
Your cheeky in the way you move
Fed on my weakness because you’d know I’d listen
But you’ve mistaken my blood shot eyes, for ones that glisten.
How could you think I’d be that easy?

I’m stronger than you realize, It insults me you mistook me for a phoney
You’ve been taunting me for years, how infuriating that your voices haven’t made me enough lonely
Your angry, losing patience in the divided line
But your poison kept me alive when it came down to my life and a telephone line

I’m a fool, not foolish. Near sighted, not blind
You made me weakest, gave false hopes on becoming yours and no longer mine

I’ve realized maybe you wanted me to meet my real demons
While they flashed red and blue in the taillight behind

I can’t decide if you wanted me at the bottom
As payment for my sins
Or gave me an opportunity to start solving all the real problems,
The ones from within.
I can’t find the right words yet.
I’m hoping this was our last dance
But I mean it when I say I met my maker
I know this time is my time, a real second chance.
Ri
Written by
Ri  29/F/New York
(29/F/New York)   
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