Chirrup, chirrup, chirrup,
I
wish that bird would
shut the *** up,

how can I concentrate
on motivational ****
with all that noise
going on.

Anyway
I think the whole world's gone Jumanji
the hunter's out to get me
there are lions in the bathroom
and no room to manoeuvre,

only Thursday and I'm trying
but Thursday's trying me,
someone, please untie these ropes
and set this poor fool free.