I don't know when it happened but it just started getting heavier

Getting up
     it could take days
Going back to sleep
     it could take years
Putting away my phone
    it could take forever

And do you also think gravity is getting on me? Doing its best to make
                      everything
                 so
        ****
heavy

As if I should be punished for wanting to stay up in the clouds
                everywhere I go
                                         everything I do

As if I should not get any release
As if I should have learned that I must not escape to pink skies and air
As if I should have gotten used to loving grey ceilings, asphalt and wind just as much

As if there wasn't anything else to long for
As if this should be it
As if this actually is it.