Jul 2020
i'm stuck in this bomb of a body;
heels pressed into the knowledge
that things will always go wrong.
finger cocked on the hair-trigger that is my mind;
whether the blast will go inwards or out no one knows.
either way, the result will hurt everyone close
to this disaster that is me and myself;
the only thing i can be trusted to do
is sabotage my health -
i fail on purpose at everything else,
heels pressed into the knowledge
that things will always go wrong.
finger cocked on the hair-trigger that is my mind;
whether the blast will go inwards or out no one knows.
either way, the result will hurt everyone close
to this disaster that is me and myself;
the only thing i can be trusted to do
is sabotage my health -
i fail on purpose at everything else,
Note: This was written 8 months ago. I was in an abusive situation, and I'm out now. Things still aren't great, but it does get a little better from here on out.
