Maybe there is still a hope that is deep inside. Maybe there is a place where love is found. Maybe there is still a pull towards a life worth mentioning here. Maybe there is an island where I can go and come back to life.
Is everything okay? Is there a rope that keeps me connected to you? Has it been severed and have I been let go? Has this cloth fully been sliced, or is there a thread still hanging on?
Maybe there is a hope that I can find in the night. Where the darkness enters the light and doesn't get extinguished. Maybe there is a longing to keep holding on. Maybe I am not fully understood by the monsters in the dark.
Is everything okay? Is there a moment that keeps me connected to you? Has the ocean washed it back into the salt? What was once a comfort and joy is counted as lost.
And what of it? What does it matter that I have been fired from my duties? Told to eff off and that everything was my fault. When it takes two to tango, has the hope been drowned under my dried soul.
And what of it? What does it matter that my lungs are contracting faster and faster? Told that everything will get better and trying to believe it. When it takes one to tango because the other no longer wants you to lead.
Has hope been severed? Has love increased inside this shriveled man? And what of it? Does it matter? Do I matter?
Maybe there is a way out. Maybe the end will justify the present exclusion of joy. Maybe just maybe the hurt will wash off into the sea. Where the salt will purify it and one day I will be home.
Will I find a place where I belong? Will anything make sense in this city of lost dreams and jokes? Will I understand why I have been placed in this concrete prison? Only time will tell.
Maybe there is still a hope that is deep inside. Maybe there is a place where love is found. Maybe there is a wave in the ocean that will bring me back home. Maybe there is an island where I can go and come back to life.
Until I find it... I'll be here. Until I find it... I'll learn to carry on. Until then... Until what? Maybe I give up... I'm... Tired...
I wrote this a short while after my fiance left me.