Everything is small today
Closed in
And choking.
Walls are built
From judging gazes
And doors
Are fumbled to lock
Through fear.
My fear
The only certainty I
Own today
It is the spaces of my mind
Is the beat in my chest
The twist in my gut
And all the dust that settles
On the stuff
I no longer think I love.
I cant look at them
Happier in their times of health
I feel like a ***** among them
Stranger bent and twisted
They wonder why i visited
At all
If i cannot stand to smile.
What is that
My lips are downturned hurt
And muscles ache
With the strain
Of keeping it together
If i should loosen my hold
Just for one toothy lie,
The i should fly apart
Around the sadness
Then who would clean up
That mess?