i once believed in my lifetime
that life is guaranteed with security
people tell me constantly
that i don’t have to ever worry
“the future’s vivid & bright,
no need to be in a hurry.”

until my wicked thoughts arrived without a warning
and slowly, transformed me into another being.
these thoughts lived a little too long inside me
before i even knew it, i then believed in them so badly.
doubt and questions clouded the once well-assured me
as i tried to live the illusion of my monstrosity.

will my mind ever taste the feeling of being free?

the answer came in a form of my identity’s inevitability:
that my mind’s only playing cruel tricks constantly;
the wickedness that i so preciously keep next to me
has never been the way i am supposed to be.
this revelation about the real me never came easy
but it has finally set my mind and heart free