“I am hoping
To hang your head

On my wall
In shame-“

I let my body become breathless,
A battered rag doll
Willingly letting
The life
Slowly trickle out of my nose
Drip down my lips
And vanish
Into the musty air.

“I want to wear

Your smile on my sleeve
And break

Your heart like a horse
Or it’s leg.”

I have a small life,
It only stretches a span
Of about five miles.
My bed
To my job.
It used to go on
For hours
And find you
In your darkest moments.
I would travel on grungy
Public transportation
Just for your
Sunshine smile.

“I want to call you thine

To tattoo mercy
Along my knuckles.”

Tattoo mercy
Across my neck,
Plead for the life giving
Powers
Of my own throat
As I feel the oxygen drain from me
In all too familiar
Panic.

“I hope

To have you forgotten
By noon.”

You were my
Most consistent
Safe place.
I wanted to cradle your dreams
And worries in my arms
And restore your love of life.
I love you.
You were the first person
I could look at
And know that my love for you
Could cause a moon landing.
And I never want
To forget that feeling.
I go back to it
In the middle of the night
When I feel incapable
Of doing good.

But you’re trying to break my heart.

And that will not stand.